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[Dermonster]

Drain the Guards vitality and add it to my own.
Head: Go for the spinal cord!
Skeleton: Sic' em!

That's a thing necromancy can do, right? Steal life force?
I need to use more dots.

[BullDog]

Stop the skiff. Be prepared to continue if it starts flooding here.
If the nazi is still alive, try to sneak up on him and knock him out with a blow to the back of the head. After the guard is disposed of, bandage all of Derm's wounds. Also use my gauze ability on him if time permits, try to restore his hp, but if I can't, use it on his lung.

[Sinpwn]

((By 'great flood' do you mean tidal wave big, or thigh-high tide big? If the former, there may be an inherent problem with stopping in the room down the stairway from the flood.))
stab stab stab stab.

[micelus]

Ostal whispers to Ostal, "On three, jump him."

"1...2...3"

ASSAULT HITLER! DYNAMIC ENTRY!

[lawastooshort]

((Blast. I'm in a Nazi mecha. He might reach certain conclusions. And the jet boost seems to have run out!))

"I am an agent of democracy and freedom! I am NOT a Nazi! I don't even have any friends that are Nazis! Are you friend, or foe?"

Flee as hard as possible towards the skiff, shooting apart any Nazis I come across.

((P.S. Go Ostals!!!))

[Gatleos]

Maaaybe this mission might be a little too suicidey. A little.
Turn 36 - Remove the Head or Destroy the Brain

Drain the Guards vitality and add it to my own.
Head: Go for the spinal cord!
Skeleton: Sic' em!

(...) You focus your will on the Nazi, targeting his life force...
(ATT) (ATT)
Nazi Head and Fleshton continue to battle the Nazi!
(DEF) (DEF)
The Nazi grabs Nazi Head from his face and tosses it off the skiff! It tucks and rolls along the ground. Meanwhile, Fleshton takes advantage of the Nazi's moment of vulnerability to deliver a hard hook to his face, knocking him to the floor of the skiff!

The Nazi passes out on the floor as you target his life force, giving you the perfect opportunity to rip it from his body! His soul is pulled from its fleshy prison, drifting toward you. Thinking quickly, you pop the cork of your wine bottle and take a few good swigs, then trap the soul inside! It seems you've managed to perform a higher-grade necromantic spell, pulling the souls of the unconscious from their bodies. The judges are impressed.
Naz'querel: 5
Qzth'thekwel: 4
Uncle Fg'rel: 3
You got 12 experience!
Unfortunately, of the many uses of the damned souls of your enemies, healing yourself is not one of them.

Stop the skiff. Be prepared to continue if it starts flooding here.
If the nazi is still alive, try to sneak up on him and knock him out with a blow to the back of the head. After the guard is disposed of, bandage all of Derm's wounds. Also use my gauze ability on him if time permits, try to restore his hp, but if I can't, use it on his lung.

(...) The skiff skids to a halt and you step away from the steering wheel, preparing your herbs and bandages. In a creative use of your Salve of Lumithos, you create balls of light inside the bullet wounds to push the bullets out of Derm's arm. You then go to work with the bandages, wrapping up his arm to quell the bleeding and prevent infection.

stab stab stab stab.

"Wait... Derm, ye didn't just sep'rate that Nazi's spirit from 'is body, did ye?"
"Uh... yes...?"
"Doesn't that make 'im a-"
The soulless corpse of the Nazi springs to its feet, howling and screeching!
"ZOMBIE!" "ZOMBIE!" "ZOMBIE!"
(ATT) (DEF) The Nazi zombie's cries of anguish are silenced as your bayonet passes through its cranium, blowing it apart and sending the rest of its body flying down the hallway! You lower your gun arm, zombie blood dripping from the bayonet.

ASSAULT HITLER! DYNAMIC ENTRY!

"On three, jump him."

"1..." "2..."
"3!" "3!"

(...) You both swoop down from the shadows and grab the Führer, holding him at knifepoint! He struggles for a moment, but you manage to subdue him.
"AGGGHHK! Was willst du von mir?!"
You can hear a great rumbling and creaking from above, as well as the sounds of evacuating personnel moving through the facility toward the surface city.

Flee as hard as possible towards the skiff, shooting apart any Nazis I come across.

"I am an agent of democracy and freedom! I am NOT a Nazi! I don't even have any friends that are Nazis! Are you friend, or foe?"
After approaching the mech, the caped figure presses a few buttons on a contraption on its wrist, then turns to look at you. Its eyes stare at you from behind a dark metal mask.
"Hmmm, I was told that the assault team in this timeline had been destroyed... stay out of my way, and you won't get hurt."
It steps around you, heading to the right down the hallway.
(...) You head off to the left, down the torn up staircase, plowing through several small groups of Nazis who are escaping up the staircase! At last you turn out into a hallway flanked by walls of glass. On the left you see the city of Meldania below through the window. Sunlight streams across the hallway through a break in the clouds. On the right, you see a medium-size hangar with rows of mechs like yours parked inside. Further down the hall you can see the skiff, where the others are sitting in a circle. A tentacle-covered head and mutilated Nazi corpse sit between you and the skiff.

Suddenly, you hear a noise to your right! A pair of abnormally large humans with automatic weapons for hands appear to be running across the hangar toward you. Oh my. Several panicking Nazis suddenly appear at the other end of the hallway, and freeze in place when they see you and the skiff-dwellers.

A klaxon siren sounds, calling for evacuation of the lower Citadel!

Status
Player: lawastooshort
Name: Hilda J Gherkin PhD (Agent Rouge)
Bio
Location: Mech Hangar Access, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: A large wrench | Sexy Catsuit | Radio | Pain-Poms | Walther Pistol | Bandage
Wounds: [HP:100/100]
Skills: Misc. Object Usage | Competent Masseuse | Noodle Limbs | One-Two Punch
Player: BullDog
Name: Zack The White (Agent Pearl)
Bio
Location: Mech Hangar Access, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Healing herbs | Nazi Uniform | Scripture of Lumithos | Bandages x6
Wounds: [HP:100/100]
Skills: Speed Reader | First Aid | Light of Lumithos | Incandescent Orb | Salve of Lumithos | Gauze of Lumithos
Player: dermonster
Name: Derm (Agent Fuchsia)
Bio
Location: Mech Hangar Access, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Pink Cloak | Tome of Eldritch Lore | Ritual Dagger | Bottle of Spirits | Bandages x3
Wounds: [HP:36/100] | Missing Tooth x5 | Wounded Arm | Punctured Lung | Heavy Bleeding (Arm) | Heavy Bleeding (Chest)
Skills: Necromancy (Level 1) | Raise Minion | Morph Undead
Player: Sinpwn
Name: Fekod "The Master Explodinator" (Agent Pewter)
Bio
Location: Mech Hangar Access, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Old Faithful | Funky Hat | Leather Trench Coat | Eye Patch | Tabasco Sauce | Empty Bottle | Bandages x4 | Spiky Rocks x2 | Small Gems x3
Wounds: [HP:100/100] Missing Left Eye | Missing Left Arm
Skills: Explosives Expert
Player: micelus
Name: Baron James Ostal (Agent Heliotrope)
Bio
Location: Level 5 Foyer, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Skeleton Key | Balaclava | Cloak | Grappling Hook | Bandages x2 | Heavy Machine Gun
Wounds: [HP:100/100]
Skills: Master Thief

Spoiler: Fleshton (click to show/hide)

Name: The Artist Formerly Known as Uni-Skeleton
Description
Inventory: Origami Bonewalker
Wounds: Undead
Skills: N/A

Spoiler: Nazi Head (click to show/hide)

Name: Nazi Head
Description
Inventory: N/A
Wounds: N/A
Skills: N/A

Spoiler: Nazi Janitor (click to show/hide)

Name: ?
Description
Inventory: Mop | Rag | Jumpsuit
Wounds: N/A
Skills: N/A

[Sinpwn]

"Ok, crisis averted, let's get this show on the road. Now."
See if this thing runs on a volatile fuel, if so, make necessary preparations to make it self-destruct on command.

[BullDog]

If I have enough time to do both, bandage up Derm's chest, then continue driving the way I was going. If not, just drive.

[Dermonster]

Right, thanks priest. Missed a spot there though. Now for mandatory post-combat improvement and harvesting time! My favorite time!
Gather my minions. Graft two more arms onto Fleshington so he has a full 360 range of attack, then grab a few stomachs and attempt to give the head some type of acid spit.


What I currently lack in quantity I shall make up for in quality!

I also appear to still be bleeding from the chest. Hmm.

[BullDog]

"Ah, don't know how I missed it. If I have enough time I'll bandage it."

[micelus]

"We demand freedom and all your technology! Say yes or I kill the dog too!"

[lawastooshort]

Retreat towards the skiff whilst shooting the two large things hard.

[Gatleos]

Protip: don't give totalitarian dictators time traveling technology. It always gets awkward.
Turn 37 - Extreme Multitasking

See if this thing runs on a volatile fuel, if so, make necessary preparations to make it self-destruct on command.

"Ok, crisis averted, let's get this show on the road. Now."
(...) You bend over the fuel tank, trying to collect a sample for test purposes. Just as you lean over it, however, the skiff jerks forward and you rake your bayonet over its surface! Fast and loose physics and statistical improbability make sweet, abstract love as your bayonet manages to simultaneously tear a hole in the fuel tank and ignite the fuel with a spark. A cone of flame jets out the back of the fuel tank, propelling the skiff forward at top speed!

If I have enough time to do both, bandage up Derm's chest, then continue driving the way I was going. If not, just drive.

(...) Grabbing Derm in a gentle yet firm headlock, you drag him over to you while mashing the accelerator and steering with your feet. Bullets fly over head and the skiff tumbles out of control down the hall as you clean Derm's wound and bandage his chest. The skiff tips over and once again skids along the wall of a stairwell as you finish the medical procedure, heading ever-deeper into the inverted tower and slamming into panicking Nazis on the way.

With a great heave, you slam the steering wheel to the right and burst out of the stairwell through a wooden door! The door splinters and sends shards of wood flying across the room as the skiff tumbles wildly through the air and jettisons the occupants. You tumble head over heels into a couch as the skiff plows through a coffee table and flies into the air, scraping along the edge of the wall and blasting through the wall at the other end of the room! Coming to your senses, you find that you've arrived in a study of some kind. A fire crackles in the fireplace, and in the dim light you can see a terrified, mustached man in a robe sitting in a chair across from you.

Right, thanks priest. Missed a spot there though. Now for mandatory post-combat improvement and harvesting time! My favorite time!
Gather my minions. Graft two more arms onto Fleshington so he has a full 360 range of attack, then grab a few stomachs and attempt to give the head some type of acid spit.

(...) You whistle for Nazi-head (telepathically of course), and he rolls over to the skiff and hops in just as it starts to accelerate forward. You instruct Fleshton to remove an arm from one of the dead Nazis, and manage to magically graft it onto his back before the skiff suddenly turns on its side and you have to hold on for your life.

BLARGLE

(...) Ostal 2 holds the knife tightly to Hitler's throat.
"We demand freedom and all your technology! Say yes or I kill the dog too!"
"Nein, nein! Ich spreche kein Meldanisch!"
A door nearby cracks open, and Ostal 2 reacts immediately by kicking Hitler to the ground and back-flipping into position above the door frame. A man wearing a lavish uniform steps into the room, and Ostal 2 drops down behind him and holds the knife to his throat. You point your gun at Hitler to keep him in check.
"Be quiet, Nazi swine."
The man in lavish uniform raises his head as the knife is pressed to his throat. As he does so, you realize that he too bears a startling resemblance to Hitler! He glances at Ostal 2, then over to you.
"Are you... Meldanians? You won't be getting any information out of him-"
He gestures to the Hitler on the floor.
"-he only speaks our native tongue."
"Wait... there's more than one?!"
You hear a loud crash not too far away, followed by a loud scraping noise. *sigh* Fekod.

Retreat towards the skiff whilst shooting the two large things hard.

(...) Reacting quickly, you turn the cockpit on its side and sidestep down the hall toward the skiff while firing on the two robots! They open fire in turn, sending a cascading wave of bullets down the hallway! Everything, like, goes all slo-mo, and the bullets are like WHOOOOSH and they leave little trails of glass behind them, it's really cool you should have seen it.

The two 'bots concentrate their fire on the mech, and you are forced to duck inside the cockpit to avoid the barrage of slugs. The mech takes a great deal of damage as it stumbles down the hallway, just reaching the edge of the stairwell at the other end. You are no longer in the robots' line of sight, but you can hear them coming toward you.

Spoiler: Robots (click to show/hide)

Two armored robots, chasing after Hilda.
Chewed up by machine gun fire

Status
Player: lawastooshort
Name: Hilda J Gherkin PhD (Agent Rouge)
Bio
Location: Mech Hangar Access, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: A large wrench | Sexy Catsuit | Radio | Pain-Poms | Walther Pistol | Bandage
Wounds: [HP:100/100]
Skills: Misc. Object Usage | Competent Masseuse | Noodle Limbs | One-Two Punch
Player: BullDog
Name: Zack The White (Agent Pearl)
Bio
Location: Level 5 Study, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Healing herbs | Nazi Uniform | Scripture of Lumithos | Bandages x4
Wounds: [HP:100/100]
Skills: Speed Reader | First Aid | Light of Lumithos | Incandescent Orb | Salve of Lumithos | Gauze of Lumithos
Player: dermonster
Name: Derm (Agent Fuchsia)
Bio
Location: Level 5 Study, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Pink Cloak | Tome of Eldritch Lore | Ritual Dagger | Bottle of Spirits | Bandages x5
Wounds: [HP:36/100] | Missing Tooth x5 | Wounded Arm | Punctured Lung | Heavy Bleeding (Arm) | Heavy Bleeding (Chest)
Skills: Necromancy (Level 1) | Raise Minion | Morph Undead
Player: Sinpwn
Name: Fekod "The Master Explodinator" (Agent Pewter)
Bio
Location: Level 5 Study, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Old Faithful | Funky Hat | Leather Trench Coat | Eye Patch | Tabasco Sauce | Empty Bottle | Bandages x4 | Spiky Rocks x2 | Small Gems x3
Wounds: [HP:100/100] Missing Left Eye | Missing Left Arm
Skills: Explosives Expert
Player: micelus
Name: Baron James Ostal (Agent Heliotrope)
Bio
Location: Level 5 Foyer, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Skeleton Key | Balaclava | Cloak | Grappling Hook | Bandages x2 | Heavy Machine Gun
Wounds: [HP:100/100]
Skills: Master Thief

Spoiler: Fleshton (click to show/hide)

Name: The Artist Formerly Known as Uni-Skeleton
Description
Inventory: Origami Bonewalker
Wounds: Undead
Skills: N/A

Spoiler: Nazi Head (click to show/hide)

Name: Nazi Head
Description
Inventory: N/A
Wounds: N/A
Skills: N/A

Spoiler: Nazi Janitor (click to show/hide)

Name: ?
Description
Inventory: Mop | Rag | Jumpsuit
Wounds: N/A
Skills: N/A

[Dermonster]

"Sir Fleshington! Capture and disable! Also turn inexplicably British!"
Capture man. Interrogate for relevant information. use threat of necromancy if he doesn't give.

[BullDog]

Look around the room. If the skiff is in this room, check how damaged it is. If not, then check on the janitor. Ask him for any useful information.