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Author Topic: Endless RTD - Steampunk Nazi Fiasco  (Read 56660 times)

Sinpwn

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Re: Endless RTD - Steampunk Nazi Fiasco
« Reply #210 on: February 04, 2012, 05:47:41 pm »

Roar a battle cry and charge the far left guardsman. Introduce him to Old Faithful's bayonnet.
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Gatleos

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Re: Endless RTD - Steampunk Nazi Fiasco
« Reply #211 on: February 05, 2012, 10:18:00 pm »

Magic in this universe is freakin' weird, man.

Turn 33 - Body Harvest
Take the gauze and cloth out of my mouth for one thing. Raise a few petty necromantic creatures from one of those corpses I've been hauling around.
Now regular skeleton: CLICK CLACK TAKE HEADS.
"There! Over there! if you don't have a head then take one of theirs, they aren't using 'em!"
(...) You run to the bottom of the stairs and whip out your ritual dagger, then proceed to saw through the neck flesh of two of the Nazi corpses. Uni-Skeleton, with the strength of his new beefy arm, tears through the spinal columns and places one of the heads atop his bare shoulders. With a snap, you fuse the head to him! He smiles creepily with his new lips and sits on the skiff. Meanwhile, you enchant the remaining head with necromantic energy!

A cluster of tentacles sprouts from the underside of the severed head, and it springs to life and crawls along the floor! Its vocal chords don't appear to be intact, as it can only make slightly sickening gurgling sounds. It begins rubbing against your leg like a cat.
Naz'querel: 4
Qzth'thekwel: 3
Uncle Fg'rel: 3
You got 10 experience!
You are now maxed out on necromorphic constructs.
(...) Uni-Skeleton stands up and sprints across the room toward the group of Nazis, windmilling his arm rapidly! (ATT) (DEF) He swings at the second Nazi from the left with his beefy arm, but the Nazi ducks under his blow and staggers backward!
Try to tell the janitor that I mean him no harm, etc in German.(In other words, try to calm him down. We might be able to get some info from him.) If I can't, try in english.(He might know it.) If he gets hostile, knock him out.
(...) You pin the janitor's arms to either side, then force him to look you in the eye. Your soul burns with a firey hate as you stare him in the face and hiss,
"EINHORN FUNKELT."
The janitor looks terrified, nodding his head in submission and appearing to pledge allegiance to you. He scrambles to the back of the skiff and cowers in the corner as you release him.
Jump onto that goddamn mecha and meleewrench that Nazi out of there. Then steal the mecha.
"Hiyarreeeergh!
(ATT) (DEF) Using the barrel of the forward machine gun for leverage, you swing into the air and land on the mecha! Your wrench flies true, smacking the pilot upside the head and knocking him senseless! You heft his body out of the mecha and hop inside.
Cautiously walk up to him.
(...)
"I say, do you-"
The ninja backflips over your head and lands behind you, placing a combat knife to your throat!
Who are you, and why are you dressed like me?! Answer!
Roar a battle cry and charge the far left guardsman. Introduce him to Old Faithful's bayonnet.
(ATT) (DEF) You stab blindly forward with the bayonet, stumbling and flailing ineffectually! The Nazi guardsman trips over his own feet but still manages to completely avoid your pathetic attack!


(ATT) (DEF) The second Nazi from the left fires at Uni-Skeleton, but he cartwheels to the side to avoid the cloud of lead!
(ATT) (DEF) The last Nazi on the left counters Fekod's wild stab with a burst of machine gun fire, but Fekod too bounds out of the way and avoids the assault!


A vague rumbling sound can be heard from above, and a drop of liquid lands on Fekod's nose. He wipes it from his face and stares at it. It appears to be water, tainted with oil-based paint.

Spoiler: Nazi Guardsmen (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: Mech Pilot (click to show/hide)
Status

Player: lawastooshort
Name: Hilda J Gherkin PhD (Agent Rouge)
Bio
Location: Entrance Hall, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: A large wrench | Sexy Catsuit | Radio | Pain-Poms | Walther Pistol | Bandage
Wounds: [HP:100/100]
Skills: Misc. Object Usage | Competent Masseuse | Noodle Limbs | One-Two Punch

Player: BullDog
Name: Zack The White (Agent Pearl)
Bio
Location: Entrance Hall, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Healing herbs | Nazi Uniform | Scripture of Lumithos | Bandages x7
Wounds: [HP:100/100]
Skills: Speed Reader | First Aid | Light of Lumithos | Incandescent Orb | Salve of Lumithos | Gauze of Lumithos

Player: dermonster
Name: Derm (Agent Fuchsia)
Bio
Location: Entrance Hall, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Pink Cloak | Tome of Eldritch Lore | Ritual Dagger | Booze Bottle | Bandages x2
Wounds: [HP:57/100] | Missing Tooth x5 | Light Bleeding
Skills: Necromancy (Level 1) | Raise Minion | Morph Undead

Player: Sinpwn
Name: Fekod "The Master Explodinator" (Agent Pewter)
Bio
Location: Entrance Hall, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Old Faithful | Funky Hat | Leather Trench Coat | Eye Patch | Tabasco Sauce | Empty Bottle | Bandages x4 | Spiky Rocks x2 | Small Gems x3
Wounds: [HP:93/100] Missing Left Eye | Missing Left Arm
Skills: Explosives Expert

Player: micelus
Name: Baron James Ostal (Agent Heliotrope)
Bio
Location: Level 5 Foyer, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Skeleton Key | Balaclava | Cloak | Grappling Hook | Bandages x2 | Heavy Machine Gun
Wounds: [HP:100/100]
Skills: Master Thief

Spoiler: Uni-Skeleton (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: Nazi Head (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: Nazi Janitor (click to show/hide)
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Think of it like Sim City, except with rival mayors that seek to destroy your citizens by arming legions of homeless people and sending them to attack you.
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Dermonster

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Re: Endless RTD - Steampunk Nazi Fiasco
« Reply #212 on: February 05, 2012, 10:31:25 pm »

Morph Nazi head.
"Okay, you go down there, eat their brains, and maybe control their spinal column. I dunno, we'll see how that goes. Doesn't work, we'll add it in later. Good luck, and (Incomprehensible)-speed."
Nazi head: Climb the guards, be the headcat.
Uni-Fleshton: You require more limbs. Gather them.

« Last Edit: February 05, 2012, 10:53:42 pm by dermonster »
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I can do anything I want, as long as I accept the consequences.
"Y'know, my favorite thing about being a hero is that it gives you all kinds of narrative justification to just slay any ol' jerk who gets in the way - Black Mage.
"The bulk of [Derm]'s atrocities seem to stem from him doing things that [Magic] doesn't actually do." - TvTropes
"Dammit Derm!" - You, if I'm doing it right.
Moved to SufficientVelocity / Spacebattles.

BullDog

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Re: Endless RTD - Steampunk Nazi Fiasco
« Reply #213 on: February 05, 2012, 10:50:54 pm »

Talk to the janitor in english, see if he knows it.
If so, ask him about the layout of this place, like how to get to Hitler's office/room. Also ask if there any traps.
Also pilot the skiff close enough to Fekod that he can get on quickly if he has to. Try to stay out of the effective range of those guns, though.
« Last Edit: February 06, 2012, 12:09:20 am by BullDog »
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Sinpwn

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Re: Endless RTD - Steampunk Nazi Fiasco
« Reply #214 on: February 05, 2012, 11:28:33 pm »

Haul ass to the skiff.
"Drive! We have no time! this place is gonna flood!"
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BullDog

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Re: Endless RTD - Steampunk Nazi Fiasco
« Reply #215 on: February 06, 2012, 12:07:38 am »

Make sure Derm is aboard, then head over to Fekod and pick him up.

While doing this, ask the janitor, in english, for directions to Hitler's office/rooms.

If he fails to understand, try with my german. If I get understandable info and the way is big enough for a skiff, go that way. If not, or it isn't, go into any passageway big enough for the skiff.(Except for where we came, of course.)
« Last Edit: February 06, 2012, 03:30:31 pm by BullDog »
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micelus

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Re: Endless RTD - Steampunk Nazi Fiasco
« Reply #216 on: February 06, 2012, 12:28:59 am »

"I'm Baron Ostal! Who else? Maybe we happen to be from two different  dimensions or whatever."
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You win Nakeen
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Inanna is my husbando

lawastooshort

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Re: Endless RTD - Steampunk Nazi Fiasco
« Reply #217 on: February 06, 2012, 04:02:13 am »

"Gosh. Ok!"

Get on the skiff if my mecha will fit. Shoot any Nazis that try to stop us!

If it won't fit...er Power up the jetpack and get the hell out of there following the skiff! Or something.

Edit: yeah. Follow yon skiff at top speed, firing at any Nazis who try to stop us!
« Last Edit: February 06, 2012, 02:10:51 pm by lawastooshort »
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Gatleos

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Re: Endless RTD - Steampunk Nazi Fiasco
« Reply #218 on: February 07, 2012, 02:04:19 pm »

Bleeding wounds now specify the part that's bleeding for quick reference. Turns out Derm improved on my wound system when he copied it, so I'm copying it back. :P
Also, I updated the rules post to better explain combat rules.


"Is that a dimensional vortex above the entrance hall? What's he doing?!"
"Uh, sir... we've got another problem."
"What now?!"
"It appears... Team LX isn't... completely gone."
"What?!?"
"One of them escaped this timeline's tavern incident, and he's already deep in the Citadel."
"..."

Turn 34 - James Ostal 2: Electric Ninjaloo
Morph Nazi head.
Nazi head: Climb the guards, be the headcat.
Uni-Fleshton: You require more limbs. Gather them.

(...) Using a bit of leftover magic, you cause Nazi Head to grow sharp fangs!
"Okay, you go down there, eat their brains, and maybe control their spinal column. I dunno, we'll see how that goes. Doesn't work, we'll add it in later. Good luck, and (Incomprehensible)-speed."
(...) The Nazi Head ignores your command, continuing to rub and nibble on your leg.
(ATT) (DEF) Fleshton and the Nazi incompetently dance around each other, neither making any headway in the fight.
Haul ass to the skiff.
(...)
"Drive! We have no time! this place is gonna flood!"
You run forward to meet the approaching skiff, diving onto it as it passes by!
Head over to Fekod and pick him up, then Hilda, if she says yes, and then Derm and his minons if he says yes.
While doing all this, ask the janitor, in english, for directions to Hitler's office/rooms.
If he fails to understand, try with my german. If I get understandable info and the way is big enough for a skiff, go that way. If not, or it isn't, go into any passageway big enough for the skiff.(Except for where we came, of course.)

"Flood?!? Hilda, Derm! Want me to pick you up?"
(...) Derm gags as you pull him backward by his collar and throw him and the Nazi Head onto the skiff. With the immediate passengers aboard, you activate the thrusters and zoom forward at top speed toward the others! Fleshton and Fekod dive onto the skiff as it passes!
BLARGH
(...)
"I'm Baron Ostal! Who else? Maybe we happen to be from two different dimensions or whatever."
"You..."
The other Ostal takes his knife away from your throat, and you turn around and take off your mask. He does the same, revealing a face identical to yours.
"How did this happen?"
"I have no idea. Maybe our superiors do?"
The other Ostal pulls out his radio and tunes it to the correct channel.
"Command! Come in command, do you know what-"
"Er, uh- The number you have dialed is not in service. Please hang up and try again."
"Something fishy is going on."
Suddenly, a noise from nearby! Someone's coming!
Follow yon skiff at top speed, firing at any Nazis who try to stop us!
(...)
"What?! FLOOD?"
You look up at the ceiling, where there is an exquisite painting of the Nazi ruler sitting atop a shining throne. The Nazi's face begins to melt and bleed across the subtly sloped ceiling.
"JEEPERS CREEPERS IT'S MELTING JUST LIKE THE BEGINNING OF THE PAGEMASTER EVERYBODY RUN!!!"
The skiff zooms past and the mecha boosts off the ground as the Nazi guardsmen stare on in awe.


The three remaining able-bodied guardsmen chase after the convoy!
(...) The Nazi closest to Hilda chases after the mecha, bounding into the air and grabbing hold of the cockpit! The mecha begins to wobble in the air and descend as the Nazi chokes Hilda from behind!
(...) The Nazi with the chipped collarbone jumps out in front of the skiff and gets run over, the prow of the craft smacking him upside the head and putting him down for the count! The skiff continues forward as Fleshton hops on-board.
(...) The second Nazi from the left chases after Fleshton as he hops onto the passing skiff, diving onto the craft and opening fire on (...) Derm! (ATT) (DEF) Several bullets pierce Derm's arm, tearing apart the muscle and grazing an artery! He recoils in pain, falling to the floor of the skiff! The Nazi advances on Zack, ready to knock him away from the wheel!


Blackened water begins to leak through the ceiling at an accelerating rate, splashing on the floor. Several patrolling guards enter the entrance hall from the barracks area, look terrified for a moment, and run back the way they came.

Status

Player: lawastooshort
Name: Hilda J Gherkin PhD (Agent Rouge)
Bio
Location: Entrance Hall, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: A large wrench | Sexy Catsuit | Radio | Pain-Poms | Walther Pistol | Bandage
Wounds: [HP:100/100]
Skills: Misc. Object Usage | Competent Masseuse | Noodle Limbs | One-Two Punch

Player: BullDog
Name: Zack The White (Agent Pearl)
Bio
Location: Entrance Hall, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Healing herbs | Nazi Uniform | Scripture of Lumithos | Bandages x7
Wounds: [HP:100/100]
Skills: Speed Reader | First Aid | Light of Lumithos | Incandescent Orb | Salve of Lumithos | Gauze of Lumithos

Player: dermonster
Name: Derm (Agent Fuchsia)
Bio
Location: Entrance Hall, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Pink Cloak | Tome of Eldritch Lore | Ritual Dagger | Booze Bottle | Bandages x2
Wounds: [HP:51/100] | Missing Tooth x5 | Wounded Arm | Heavy Bleeding (Arm)
Skills: Necromancy (Level 1) | Raise Minion | Morph Undead

Player: Sinpwn
Name: Fekod "The Master Explodinator" (Agent Pewter)
Bio
Location: Entrance Hall, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Old Faithful | Funky Hat | Leather Trench Coat | Eye Patch | Tabasco Sauce | Empty Bottle | Bandages x4 | Spiky Rocks x2 | Small Gems x3
Wounds: [HP:97/100] Missing Left Eye | Missing Left Arm
Skills: Explosives Expert

Player: micelus
Name: Baron James Ostal (Agent Heliotrope)
Bio
Location: Level 5 Foyer, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Skeleton Key | Balaclava | Cloak | Grappling Hook | Bandages x2 | Heavy Machine Gun
Wounds: [HP:100/100]
Skills: Master Thief

Spoiler: Fleshton (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: Nazi Head (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: Nazi Janitor (click to show/hide)
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Think of it like Sim City, except with rival mayors that seek to destroy your citizens by arming legions of homeless people and sending them to attack you.
Quote from: Moonshadow101
it would be funny to see babies spontaneously combust
Gat HQ (Sigtext)
++U+U++ // ,.,.@UUUUUUUU

BullDog

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Re: Endless RTD - Steampunk Nazi Fiasco
« Reply #219 on: February 07, 2012, 02:15:19 pm »

Keep driving out of there! Hope someone protects me! If the Nazi gets/is close, kick him off! Don't crash!
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micelus

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Re: Endless RTD - Steampunk Nazi Fiasco
« Reply #220 on: February 07, 2012, 02:38:17 pm »

"Best we hide; questions later."

Find a place to hide and identify what is coming.
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Do you hear that, Endra? NONE CAN STAND AGAINST THE POWER OF THE DENTAL, AHAHAHAHA!!!
You win Nakeen
Marduk is my waifu
Inanna is my husbando

lawastooshort

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Re: Endless RTD - Steampunk Nazi Fiasco
« Reply #221 on: February 07, 2012, 02:46:09 pm »

Ah man, I leave that skiff alone for 10 seconds and you go and get it hijacked!

"Wraarrghhhllhhhgggkkkkg!"

Keep following the skiff at maximum speed and then when near a wall/ceiling manoeuvre the mecha in such a way as to turn round, reverse at maximumtoplethal speed, fire all weapons for maximum recoil speed-addition, and slam that Nazi into the nearest solid wall/ceiling repeatedly till he leaves my mecha alone!
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Dermonster

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Re: Endless RTD - Steampunk Nazi Fiasco
« Reply #222 on: February 07, 2012, 03:33:27 pm »

You BASTARD! I just got myself fixed!
Stab guard.
Uni-Fleshington: Eat guard
Nazi-head: Headcrab time!
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I can do anything I want, as long as I accept the consequences.
"Y'know, my favorite thing about being a hero is that it gives you all kinds of narrative justification to just slay any ol' jerk who gets in the way - Black Mage.
"The bulk of [Derm]'s atrocities seem to stem from him doing things that [Magic] doesn't actually do." - TvTropes
"Dammit Derm!" - You, if I'm doing it right.
Moved to SufficientVelocity / Spacebattles.

Sinpwn

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Re: Endless RTD - Steampunk Nazi Fiasco
« Reply #223 on: February 07, 2012, 05:16:42 pm »

Help Derm stab the nazi. Stab stab stab.
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Gatleos

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Re: Endless RTD - Steampunk Nazi Fiasco
« Reply #224 on: February 09, 2012, 08:45:41 pm »

I like how the wizard who's supposed to be standing in the back away from danger has easily taken the most abuse so far. And that's saying something, when another player is missing an arm.

Turn 35 - High-Speed Showdown
Keep driving out of there! Hope someone protects me! If the Nazi gets/is close, kick him off! Don't crash!
(...) The skiff rockets across the room as you apply the throttle, heading straight for the junction.
"I hope this works..."
You suddenly slam the steering wheel to the left, causing the skiff to tip on its side and head for the downward stairway!
Find a place to hide and identify what is coming.
(...)
"Best we hide; questions later."
Both you and the other Ostal (OO) fly up into a corner of the room and cling to the edge of the ceiling, waiting for the danger to show itself. A moaning figure soon staggers from the demolished bathroom, clutching his bleeding chest. You've seen this man before, somewhere, but it takes you a moment to recognize him in the flesh. He bears a striking resemblance to the Alien Tyrant, Adolf Hitler!
Keep following the skiff at maximum speed and then when near a wall/ceiling manoeuvre the mecha in such a way as to turn round, reverse at maximumtoplethal speed, fire all weapons for maximum recoil speed-addition, and slam that Nazi into the nearest solid wall/ceiling repeatedly till he leaves my mecha alone!
(...)
"Wraarrghhhllhhhgggkkkkg!"
The mech swings 180 degrees in midair, its boosters swapping directions and accelerating it toward the wall! With a great crash the mech slams into the wall at massive velocity, shattering the Nazi's spinal column and ribcage! His body slumps off the back of the mech and falls to the floor as the mech drifts away from the wall, its boosters finally giving out and allowing it to descend to the ground.
Stab guard.
Uni-Fleshington: Eat guard
Nazi-head: Headcrab time!

Help Derm stab the nazi. Stab stab stab.
"You BASTARD! I just got myself fixed!"
(ATT) (ATT) (ATT) (ATT)
Derm, Fekod, Uni-Fleshington III Esq., and the Nazi Head descend on the Nazi who done shot the Derm, their minds bent on murder!
(DEF) (DEF) (DEF) (DEF)
The Nazi bends out of the way to evade Fekod's bayonet. Meanwhile, Derm tosses his ritual dagger at the Nazi's face! The Nazi deftly catches the projectile, then hurls it back at Derm! (ATT) (DEF) The sharp dagger hits Derm in the chest, carving a deep gash and puncturing the lung! As if in response to the Nazi's offense against their master, Nazi Head and Fleshton pounce on the Nazi! Nazi Head leaps onto the Nazi's face, biting and scratching at him with its tentacles and tearing up his face! Fleshton lunges at the guardsman and tears into his chest with his teeth like some sort of minimalist zombie!

The skiff veers wildly into the wide staircase leading downward into the Citadel, banking nearly 90 degrees to the side and surfing along the curved wall of the stairwell! The bottom of the skiff carves a swathe into the wall, kicking up a trail of dust on the way. At last an opening arrives, and Zack pulls a hard right out of the stairwell and into a large, open hallway flanked by windows! The Nazi and undead horrors continue to battle in the center of the skiff as it zooms down the hallway.

The ceiling of the entrance hall finally blows apart under the weight of the torrent of water, giving way to the great flood! Water gushes from the collapsed dome in the ceiling, rushing across the floor of the entrance hall. A lone figure slowly descends from the gaping hole in the ceiling, their cape flapping in the rushing mist. Hilda stares at the figure as it touches down and begins walking across the room toward her.

Status

Player: lawastooshort
Name: Hilda J Gherkin PhD (Agent Rouge)
Bio
Location: Entrance Hall, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: A large wrench | Sexy Catsuit | Radio | Pain-Poms | Walther Pistol | Bandage
Wounds: [HP:100/100]
Skills: Misc. Object Usage | Competent Masseuse | Noodle Limbs | One-Two Punch

Player: BullDog
Name: Zack The White (Agent Pearl)
Bio
Location: ?, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Healing herbs | Nazi Uniform | Scripture of Lumithos | Bandages x7
Wounds: [HP:100/100]
Skills: Speed Reader | First Aid | Light of Lumithos | Incandescent Orb | Salve of Lumithos | Gauze of Lumithos

Player: dermonster
Name: Derm (Agent Fuchsia)
Bio
Location: ?, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Pink Cloak | Tome of Eldritch Lore | Ritual Dagger | Booze Bottle | Bandages x2
Wounds: [HP:41/100] | Missing Tooth x5 | Wounded Arm | Punctured Lung | Heavy Bleeding (Arm) | Heavy Bleeding (Chest)
Skills: Necromancy (Level 1) | Raise Minion | Morph Undead

Player: Sinpwn
Name: Fekod "The Master Explodinator" (Agent Pewter)
Bio
Location: ?, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Old Faithful | Funky Hat | Leather Trench Coat | Eye Patch | Tabasco Sauce | Empty Bottle | Bandages x4 | Spiky Rocks x2 | Small Gems x3
Wounds: [HP:100/100] Missing Left Eye | Missing Left Arm
Skills: Explosives Expert

Player: micelus
Name: Baron James Ostal (Agent Heliotrope)
Bio
Location: Level 5 Foyer, Nazi Citadel
Inventory: Skeleton Key | Balaclava | Cloak | Grappling Hook | Bandages x2 | Heavy Machine Gun
Wounds: [HP:100/100]
Skills: Master Thief

Spoiler: Fleshton (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: Nazi Head (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: Nazi Janitor (click to show/hide)
Logged
Think of it like Sim City, except with rival mayors that seek to destroy your citizens by arming legions of homeless people and sending them to attack you.
Quote from: Moonshadow101
it would be funny to see babies spontaneously combust
Gat HQ (Sigtext)
++U+U++ // ,.,.@UUUUUUUU
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