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[Clutzy]

Excepting Divorce was far, far less common back in the 1400's.

As in, it was probably more socially acceptable to muder your wife *cough king Henry cough* than to divorce her.

Still, widows should get remarried after a mourning period. Widowers too.

Wait, was? ...shit.

It also helped that generally the wifey was not expected to live long. Unless she was Legendary in childbirth.

[FearfulJesuit]

I'd be frightened if Childbirth became a skill.

[Frelus]

Isnt there a sig floating around the forums "this is a dwarfen baby. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. It menaces with spikes of beard" or so?
Soooo many new possibilities.
Wait....
Skill lowers production time, right?
If I have 5 legendary birthgivers, Could I flood enemy sieges with a tsunami of babies?
Hah, WEAPONISATION INITIATED

[Karnewarrior]

I'd be frightened if Childbirth became a skill.

Legendary Birther?

Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa

[nightwhips]

I'd be frightened if Childbirth became a skill.

Legendary Birther?

Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa

Urist McFertile cancels job: have baby. Looking for infant.

[Loud Whispers]

I'd be frightened if Childbirth became a skill.

Legendary Birther?

Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa

Urist McFertile cancels job: have baby. Looking for infant.

Can you imagine the terror if the mother ended up on a candy serrated disc hallway... Bits of baby raining down on the enemy....

[Karnewarrior]

I'd be frightened if Childbirth became a skill.

Legendary Birther?

Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa Pop whaaa

Urist McFertile cancels job: have baby. Looking for infant.

Can you imagine the terror if the mother ended up on a candy serrated disc hallway... Bits of baby raining down on the enemy....

When people ask me why I don't flinch at the worst, most violent, depraved games, I will show them this post, and this game.

And they will understand.

[Yoink]

This thread... Truly, just classic. The cuckolded husband 'admiring a fine sock lately' was genius.
Grinding birthing skill in adventure mode could be fun.
NO WAIT! A birthing danger room, only instead of spears it has... Wait, too far?

[Loud Whispers]

This thread... Truly, just classic. The cuckolded husband 'admiring a fine sock lately' was genius.
Grinding birthing skill in adventure mode could be fun.
NO WAIT! A birthing danger room, only instead of spears it has... Wait, too far?

NSFW

But baby blenders totally are.

Wait, do you think having the spouse cheat with literally everyone in the fortress count as a basis for divorce?
I wonder if the mother would be depressed at seeing her babies weaponised as ballistae munitions

[Aspgren]

If the mother is going to birth at such speed why not save time and let her BE the ballistae?

[Yoink]

Yes, just set the... What do you call the ballista version of a bowstring? What ever it is, just have it held ready just below the mother's legs, and release it as soon as each baby pops out.

[Loud Whispers]

If the mother is going to birth at such speed why not save time and let her BE the ballistae?

But then how would you put the explosives and the bolts on the babies?

Thing is, there are dwarf babies, they would probably land on the poor victim, and proceed to cave in it's skull, and beat it to death with it's own limbs.

Then become mayor.

[raptorfangamer]

mother ballistaes?
pfft. everyone knows babies were, and still are, meatshields!
...
oh wait, they can be used as that, but also as expendable bombs...
quick, see if we can genetically engineer those dwarven mothers so babies are legendary biters!

[King DZA]

You know, ever since I was able to grasp basic biology, the entire process of procreation, from conception to birth, has creeped me right the fuck out.

This thread has not helped.

[krenshala]

[ steps over to the rails for a moment ... ]
Divorce doesn't happen in DF because if a dwarf wanted to get rid of hir significant other, Necro would be providing the necessary lighting (a dim yellow-red, slow moving, very warm glowing light source), just after the appropriate lever was pulled.

[ steps back over to the ongoing discussion ]
Just cage the Legendary Birther, place the cage about the middle of your trap hall and connect the cage to a pressure plate that triggers on hostiles.  Hit plate, open cage, get swarmed by angry tantruming dorf babies that want to punch your skull through your brain, rip limbs off an beat you death with them.

Oh, and remember ... the dwarves don't pick the socks, the socks pick the dwarves.  [Where did we leave that thread about the sock temple with the trapped bridge, and attempting to keep the fort alive as The Sock claims your populace one dwarf at a time?]