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Author Topic: I do Believe i have been taken for a fool.  (Read 5237 times)

DJ

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Re: I do Believe i have been taken for a fool.
« Reply #30 on: October 31, 2011, 06:18:13 pm »

There's degrees of favours, and car repair is on the high end. You don't accept favours like that from people for nothing, the least you do is offer some money. And you especially don't ask for them for nothing. From what I gather OP didn't just up and offer to repair it for no reason, she's been not so subtly hinting that she needs help with her car and then she basically tricked him into repairing it when they were supposed to be hanging out.
« Last Edit: October 31, 2011, 06:20:47 pm by DJ »
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Ogdibus

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Re: I do Believe i have been taken for a fool.
« Reply #31 on: October 31, 2011, 06:32:09 pm »

.
« Last Edit: July 01, 2013, 06:10:23 am by Ogdibus »
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Uthric

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Re: I do Believe i have been taken for a fool.
« Reply #32 on: October 31, 2011, 06:41:34 pm »

I think he's trying to figure out whether he should pursue a relationship with this person.  Knowing whether or not he was being used helps determine if it is possible.  If he knew for certain that he was being used, I would say that commenting on reciprocity would be helpful emotional support, but it seems a little to soon for that.


reciprocity ( had to look it up)

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Neonivek

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Re: I do Believe i have been taken for a fool.
« Reply #33 on: October 31, 2011, 06:43:11 pm »

What makes you think that every date must end up in sex? Just because you go out with someone doesn't mean you necessarily want to sleep with her, you know.
OK, sorry, let me rephrase that:
what the hell made you think you'd get a date just for helping her out once or twice? Girls aren't obliged to repay kindness with a relation you know...
They're also not obliged to exploit guys they notice are attracted to them. Just like people aren't obliged to steal unguarded property or kick abandoned puppies.

Technically she is not obliged to exploit guys they notice are nice.
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Uthric

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Re: I do Believe i have been taken for a fool.
« Reply #34 on: October 31, 2011, 06:57:50 pm »

who would of thought this would be such a big thing
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Ogdibus

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Re: I do Believe i have been taken for a fool.
« Reply #35 on: October 31, 2011, 08:41:15 pm »

.
« Last Edit: July 01, 2013, 06:10:57 am by Ogdibus »
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Necro910

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Re: I do Believe i have been taken for a fool.
« Reply #36 on: October 31, 2011, 08:54:02 pm »

who would of thought this would be such a big thing
x3  It must strike a nerve with a lot of people.  It's likely many of us have been on one or both sides of this sort of situation.
MPD?  :P

Uthric

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Re: I do Believe i have been taken for a fool.
« Reply #37 on: October 31, 2011, 10:11:19 pm »

so any one else wishing to give advice?
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Uthric

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Re: I do Believe i have been taken for a fool.
« Reply #38 on: November 01, 2011, 12:23:56 am »

564 views, you think there would be more people to post what they think is going on.
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Vector

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Re: I do Believe i have been taken for a fool.
« Reply #39 on: November 01, 2011, 12:25:21 am »

564 views, you think there would be more people to post what they think is going on.

Given that you already got your answer, multiple times, from many different people, I can only assume that you're looking for someone to say "She's playing hard to get!  Go after her!"

Don't even think about it.
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"The question of the usefulness of poetry arises only in periods of its decline, while in periods of its flowering, no one doubts its total uselessness." - Boris Pasternak

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Tellemurius

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Re: I do Believe i have been taken for a fool.
« Reply #40 on: November 01, 2011, 12:32:50 am »

564 views, you think there would be more people to post what they think is going on.
Give up damnit, you already tried and you got nothing in the end. Either keep the relationship as friends or push her aside and find someone else.

Itnetlolor

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Re: I do Believe i have been taken for a fool.
« Reply #41 on: November 01, 2011, 12:37:23 am »

I'm in agreement here. You've already gotten your answers; don't become the kind of Nice Guy other nice guys want to kick the ass of for making them look bad. If it's as Vector said, I'd stay as far away from obsession as possible. It never ends well.

Having been a Nice Guy myself in the past, pursuit only gets you deeper into the pit. Being given hope only helps the ego, none more than that. Your situation and future encounters won't improve with just hope alone. This also applies to anyone else that makes it a serious business about getting a woman (IE- the types that want to get laid more than anything; admit it, Nice Guys are guilty of this too.). The best advice is give up and worry about (only) yourself. Sure you'll come off as/eventually turn into a bit of an asshole (or at least a seasoned veteran in attitude), but as evidence shows (IE- The most dominant Nice Guy complaint), that's what women want. Not necessarily the 'Asshole' per say, but someone that looks out for themself, and not whoever they're with (or have eyes for); in most cases, exclusively.

Similar can be applied as to what guys seek in women. Sure, the damsel in distress, and numerous other feminine/romantic tropes, are nice fantasies; but in reality, they're actually quite impractical and annoying. Who wants to save a woman, or in fact anyone, from everything under the sun? The satisfaction only lasts so long until you finally get bored of saving them, or it gets in the way of your schedules.

Albeit, I'm still single myself (and trust me, I followed every trope and cliche that Nice Guys do to get a women they like to return the favor. None of them work.), but I don't care anymore. BTW, with my more recent personality, practicing what I preach, and so forth after giving up, I've actually been, at least, given a glance of attraction from some women at times (even though I'm mostly blind to such things, as is (side-effect of being a Nice Guy for so long; radar is dead or severely atrophied from prolonged failure), and have to be informed by whoever's with me who took notice). Put enough effort in improving yourself, and the roles will be switched, and you can decide what to do with the next Nice Girl (or good person) that comes your way, and show attraction towards you. You have no idea how much more satisfying that position is, than chasing someone. When you're the one being pursued, then the ball is in your court this time.

In case none of this gets through to you or anyone else (I'm looking at you tl;dr's), then listen to this: Don't let the bitterness of failure make you bitter as a person. It'll only make everything worse in the long run, and that class of asshole is repulsive to everyone. The only kind of people that attracts are the kind of internet trolls that live off of ruining livelihoods and reputations. And those people suck.
« Last Edit: November 01, 2011, 01:20:00 am by Itnetlolor »
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Scaraban

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Re: I do Believe i have been taken for a fool.
« Reply #42 on: November 01, 2011, 03:05:14 am »

Speaking as a repulsive asshole, just let it go. You got burned, sever ties, uproot life, on to the next town, move on.
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Uthric

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Re: I do Believe i have been taken for a fool.
« Reply #43 on: November 01, 2011, 02:00:39 pm »

any way, the original thing i said about just having other stuff to do was right to start with.

i stopped out there to get a burger and ignored her, she came down there to speak to me first. ended up taking a early lunch to come chill at my place, next week in less something comes up we going to the movies/ or what ever.

SO, any way i appreciated all the comments even the hateful ones



what i learned form this next time i'm fucked up don't think, and if i do drink till i cant remember what i thought about


« Last Edit: November 01, 2011, 02:13:24 pm by Uthric »
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Vector

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Re: I do Believe i have been taken for a fool.
« Reply #44 on: November 01, 2011, 05:45:04 pm »

I'm not sure where you got "hateful" out of anything anyone has said, but whatever.  Good luck, and don't kill yourself with alcohol.
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"The question of the usefulness of poetry arises only in periods of its decline, while in periods of its flowering, no one doubts its total uselessness." - Boris Pasternak

nonbinary/genderfluid/genderqueer renegade mathematician and mafia subforum limpet. please avoid quoting me.

pronouns: prefer neutral ones, others are fine. height: 5'3".
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