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Author Topic: Dumbest dwarven death?  (Read 21790 times)

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Re: Dumbest dwarven death?
« Reply #90 on: November 04, 2011, 08:46:16 pm »

Does "Starving to death because he's been throwing tantrums because he's hungry" count?

Yes, but I think if he had died because he was trying to eat lava cookies would have been better.

But certainly that is better than a lot we've had.
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nightdagger

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Re: Dumbest dwarven death?
« Reply #91 on: November 04, 2011, 10:53:05 pm »

As a result of a siege, a tantrum spiral, an immigration wave, and another siege, my fortress dwindled down to the last dwarf.  Miserable, on the verge of going crazy, he's running down a three tile wide hallway, chasing a large rat in hopes of eating it (at least I would like to think that's what he was doing, most likely the rat was just running away from the dwarf) while being chased by a goblin maceman.  The end draws near, as the tunnel he's running down is a dead end.  They reach the end of the tunnel, the rat jukes the dwarf, the dwarf jukes the goblin, and the chase continues back into fortress proper, Benny Hill style.

This continues until they reach my food stores.  The large rat promptly guzzles 24 units of dwarven wine in a single gulp, the dwarf, apparently realizing now that he's been chasing Ratzilla, screams and runs out of the front doorway of the fortress, seemingly having had enough of the fortress.  He escapes the goblin, runs to the edge of the map, chills out there for a few minutes, and then realizes he's still hungry.  And runs back into the fort.  Right into the goblin.

Good job, Urist McRumblebelly.
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sobriquet

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Re: Dumbest dwarven death?
« Reply #92 on: November 04, 2011, 11:20:51 pm »

Wha..........?  O_____o    ONLY THREE FATALITIES?

wow.  just....wow.



wow - I'm rather derailing - fact is that I've only had 3 dwarves ever die on me in any of my forts. 2 were from failed moods, and the last one was from a FB syndrome.
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Ultimuh

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Re: Dumbest dwarven death?
« Reply #93 on: November 04, 2011, 11:41:13 pm »

As a result of a siege, a tantrum spiral, an immigration wave, and another siege, my fortress dwindled down to the last dwarf.  Miserable, on the verge of going crazy, he's running down a three tile wide hallway, chasing a large rat in hopes of eating it (at least I would like to think that's what he was doing, most likely the rat was just running away from the dwarf) while being chased by a goblin maceman.  The end draws near, as the tunnel he's running down is a dead end.  They reach the end of the tunnel, the rat jukes the dwarf, the dwarf jukes the goblin, and the chase continues back into fortress proper, Benny Hill style.

This continues until they reach my food stores.  The large rat promptly guzzles 24 units of dwarven wine in a single gulp, the dwarf, apparently realizing now that he's been chasing Ratzilla, screams and runs out of the front doorway of the fortress, seemingly having had enough of the fortress.  He escapes the goblin, runs to the edge of the map, chills out there for a few minutes, and then realizes he's still hungry.  And runs back into the fort.  Right into the goblin.

Good job, Urist McRumblebelly.

That's just hilarious.  :P
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Eric Blank

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Re: Dumbest dwarven death?
« Reply #94 on: November 05, 2011, 12:07:23 am »

I heartily agree. You just can't beat the idiocy of the dwarves. :P
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Re: Dumbest dwarven death?
« Reply #95 on: November 06, 2011, 07:53:52 am »

My mason got raped by a goblin thief while she was building a wall.
Thats about it at this moment :P
(i didnt play for very long)
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Re: Dumbest dwarven death?
« Reply #96 on: November 06, 2011, 02:39:49 pm »

A mason who drowned after walling himself inside a pump stack. Of course the reason he needed to wall anything was to repair the stack after a miner trapped himself in that very same spot while digging it out.
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Kallin

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Re: Dumbest dwarven death?
« Reply #97 on: November 06, 2011, 06:55:41 pm »

My mason got raped by a goblin thief while she was building a wall.
Thats about it at this moment :P
(i didnt play for very long)

Wait, actually raped?
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Re: Dumbest dwarven death?
« Reply #98 on: November 06, 2011, 07:14:53 pm »

My mason got raped by a goblin thief while she was building a wall.
Thats about it at this moment :P
(i didnt play for very long)

Wait, actually raped?


Can you imagine the baby? It would be evil (well more evil), disregard all life (well dwarves already do that), and be able to destroy the world. (Again dwarves).

With red eyes.

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Re: Dumbest dwarven death?
« Reply #99 on: November 06, 2011, 07:40:56 pm »

My mason got raped by a goblin thief while she was building a wall.
Thats about it at this moment :P
(i didnt play for very long)

Wait, actually raped?


Can you imagine the baby? It would be evil (well more evil), disregard all life (well dwarves already do that), and be able to destroy the world. (Again dwarves).

With red eyes.
It really makes you wonder, huh...
The only real difference is Red eyes, Green skin, and beards...
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Re: Dumbest dwarven death?
« Reply #100 on: November 06, 2011, 07:44:12 pm »

I forgot another thing - IT WOULD BE IMMORTAL

Lordraymond

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Re: Dumbest dwarven death?
« Reply #101 on: November 06, 2011, 10:25:25 pm »

NEW DUMBEST DEATH AGAIN!

Alright, I started a world on a whim, and I decided to exchange a prebuilt expedition leader with a hunter with a few preplaced social skills, mostly for the armor and crossbow. I start off my fort, everythings going well in initial digging, then, no more than two minutes in I get the message "Urist McHunter has bled to death"

Naturally I'm like, 'what...?' at one of my dwarves with no tasks just randomly dying, especially my best equipped one. Then, I check the reports and see a one-page combat log: He decided to shoot a copper bolt at an alligator, which promptly literally ripped him in half. Guess I'm starting a fort with six dwarves!

Even worse, the first migrant wave just arrived with only two, a miller and a farmer, so no help there. On the bright side, the miller came with adequate combat skills and only novice milling, so he gave me a free iron battleaxe.
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zehive

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Re: Dumbest dwarven death?
« Reply #102 on: November 07, 2011, 12:46:15 am »

I forgot another thing - IT WOULD BE IMMORTAL
baby ducks are products of rape.

Ultimuh

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Re: Dumbest dwarven death?
« Reply #103 on: November 07, 2011, 12:53:45 am »

On the bright side, the miller came with adequate combat skills and only novice milling, so he gave me a free iron battleaxe.

Seems like some times the game tends to apologize for it's sadistic tendencies..
..Or maybe not.. maybe it tells you things have just begun..
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Lordraymond

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Re: Dumbest dwarven death?
« Reply #104 on: November 07, 2011, 01:11:12 am »

On the bright side, the miller came with adequate combat skills and only novice milling, so he gave me a free iron battleaxe.

Seems like some times the game tends to apologize for it's sadistic tendencies..
..Or maybe not.. maybe it tells you things have just begun..

Inb4 miller is first dwarf to mood/berserk
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