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Author Topic: Dwarves and beastfolk...and a slightly disturbing thought..  (Read 11264 times)

Loud Whispers

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Re: Dwarves and beastfolk...and a slightly disturbing thought..
« Reply #45 on: November 26, 2011, 03:12:41 pm »

So... some type of magical strike into an area, then tens of years later the area is full of small, self-destructive, alcohol-reliant, bearded tree-huggers that live forever?

O_O
Nightmarish...

Now all we need is to teach them how to use weapons and mechanisms.

caknuck

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Re: Dwarves and beastfolk...and a slightly disturbing thought..
« Reply #46 on: November 26, 2011, 05:21:21 pm »

Great. Now I'm going to view my zoos as elaborate sexatoria. I will have a female of each non-grazing species in specialized cages next to booze stockpiles. And stadium seating.
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sambojin

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Re: Dwarves and beastfolk...and a slightly disturbing thought..
« Reply #47 on: November 26, 2011, 09:29:37 pm »

If this does get implemented, I think the question is more of "How do I keep my dwarves as a pure species?" than "Just how did that dwarf-giants mother fit it all in?".

If I end up with an elf/dwarf, how do I get that person back to being a dwarf?

Do I hit him very hard with an axe, hoping to end up with at least half a dwarf? At least 1/2 of him dies a dwarf.

Do I drop him off a cliff and instruct a necromancer to only sew the now exploded dwarven bits back together? An undead dwarf is still dwarfier than an elfdwarf.

The required dose of cave-in dust general anaethestic followed by precision serrated disc cosmetic surgery? He'll at least "look" like a dwarf (and a bit like most goblin seigers).

Or do I just burn off all the elvy bits with magma, leaving a normal if somewhat charred dwarf? Like what usually happens to elf bits, no matter what they're connected to?

Should we make a poll the moment it's implemented for the most effective or funniest ways of de-elfisizing dwarves. Like we usually do?

I'm not racist, or sexist, or even homophobic. But elfdwarves is just unnatural. There has to be a cure.......
« Last Edit: November 26, 2011, 09:37:59 pm by sambojin »
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Loud Whispers

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Re: Dwarves and beastfolk...and a slightly disturbing thought..
« Reply #48 on: November 26, 2011, 09:35:49 pm »

Well lets see;

ElfDwarf v.2

*Can manipulate trees.
*Never dies of old age.
*Alcohol inter-dependant.
*Berserk when inebriated.
*Devours enemies.
*Can shape the Earth with bare hands.
*Easily offended by the existence of the enemy.
*Capable of taming and weaponizing mother nature.
*Capable of creating and weaponizing everything mechanical and subterranean in nature.
*Builds Doomsday weapons.

This sounds very dwarfy indeed.
Of course you can just get your medical dwarves to chop this, put that on, stitch that up and...

Dwarf v.1
*Dies horribly, suddenly and voilently.
*Alcohol dependant.
*Berserk when forever.
*Turns enemies into mugs.
*Can shape the Earth with bare hands.
*Builds doomsday weapons.

Of course, all of this madness can be avoided by making sure this is never implemented.

sambojin

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Re: Dwarves and beastfolk...and a slightly disturbing thought..
« Reply #49 on: November 26, 2011, 09:44:22 pm »

I guess there might be some sadistic pleasure to be gained in making elfdwarves into lumberjacks and carpenters. Or kobolds into brokers. Or badger-dwarfmen into plant gatherers.

"But I don't want to deforest the entire map and turn it into beds and bins."

"Shut up, drink your grog and do it. Or we'll burn all your elf bits off you freak."
« Last Edit: November 26, 2011, 09:46:00 pm by sambojin »
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Loud Whispers

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Re: Dwarves and beastfolk...and a slightly disturbing thought..
« Reply #50 on: November 26, 2011, 09:48:43 pm »

But wouldn't an ElfDwarf raised in a Dwarf Fortress be without all cultural flaws inherited by Elves? So all the physical benefits of Elves with no disadvantages. Added with all the cultural flaws of dwarves and absolutely no benefits :P

restricted

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Re: Dwarves and beastfolk...and a slightly disturbing thought..
« Reply #51 on: November 26, 2011, 09:56:36 pm »

... I think they already have implemented this, at least in previous releases. Cacame was a shining example.
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sambojin

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Re: Dwarves and beastfolk...and a slightly disturbing thought..
« Reply #52 on: November 26, 2011, 10:21:42 pm »

So being bigger, faster and immortal is an advantage? Hmmmph.....

Well, back to the freaky midget/giant porn and hedgehogs being buggered.......
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IronValley

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Re: Dwarves and beastfolk...and a slightly disturbing thought..
« Reply #53 on: November 27, 2011, 08:36:38 am »

If we go on the basis of badgermen = man + badger, (which is quite a disturbing image I tell you!), I foresee a LOT of catmen appearing in Dwarwen fortresses around the world(s).

Now imagine man + giant badger.... I dare you!
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Kogut

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Re: Dwarves and beastfolk...and a slightly disturbing thought..
« Reply #54 on: November 27, 2011, 11:05:50 am »

Actually, there are two kinds of frogs that are closely related, live next to each other, and will ocasionaly interbreed at the edges of thier territory, but they always seem to outcompete the hybrids, even though they are fertile. At least I think I remember reading that... Suffice it to say, defining species there was problematic...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hybrid_zone
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Loud Whispers

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Re: Dwarves and beastfolk...and a slightly disturbing thought..
« Reply #55 on: November 27, 2011, 11:20:25 am »

Frogs with frogs are one thing, that kind of breeding causes new species. Breeding that frog with lets say, a cat, would be impossibleh L:

Frelus

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Re: Dwarves and beastfolk...and a slightly disturbing thought..
« Reply #56 on: November 27, 2011, 01:12:31 pm »

But wasn't it horse+donkey=mule?
And I don't think horses and donkeys are of the same species.
greetz
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Re: Dwarves and beastfolk...and a slightly disturbing thought..
« Reply #57 on: November 27, 2011, 02:23:19 pm »

If it ever gets in, I would try to make a Dr. Urist Moro fortress and breed an ultimate specie.
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Loud Whispers

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Re: Dwarves and beastfolk...and a slightly disturbing thought..
« Reply #58 on: November 27, 2011, 03:46:51 pm »

But wasn't it horse+donkey=mule?
And I don't think horses and donkeys are of the same species.
greetz

Male donkey + Female horse, their genetics are alike enough. Sure. Are you saying a Dwarf would be compatible with a badger or an elf?

powell

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Re: Dwarves and beastfolk...and a slightly disturbing thought..
« Reply #59 on: November 27, 2011, 05:15:34 pm »

A dwarf civilization sacks a nearby kobold camp and enslaves the kobolds.  Then a caravan brings kobold sex slaves to your fortress for your nobles.  Maybe that will stop them from making mandates.
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