Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Necro910]

Your observation skills are grand master.

[raptorfangamer]

*first day at dwarf fortress*
"well, I got past my eyes violently bleeding and exploding, this seems like a fun game! lets embark here!"
miner cancels dig: interrupted by buzzards
"what-who-why-when-where?"
*sees how buzzards start stealing stuff*
"why-how-what-I-dont-understand"
your settlement has been abandoned
"thats it, back to the tutorials"

but, that was a while back, in 40d or so...

[trees]

I thought embarking on a major river would be a cool idea. The dwarves thought parking the wagon on top of it, in the middle of a huge ravine, would be a cool idea. This was an embark where everyone was a peasant and all I brought was a fire-safe rock and a lump of tetrahedrite. The ice thawed and everyone drowned before we could dig ourselves out.

[Crioca]

Under 30 seconds. I embarked on a terrifying evil biome with a spire that I didn't know was there. Undead hydra raced straight out and pinned all of them in the tunnel I was digging. This was the first week I started playing.

[Captain Mayhem]

Never had as quick defeats as these guys, but the quickest one yet was just earlier today (not counting those games where you leave instantly. That's not losing fun, that's just being picky about locations).
About an hour. I'm still somewhat of a newbie at this game, so most forts have so far been borderline-paranoia safe with death by FPS or HFS exclusively. Never embarking without multiple metals, never on an aquifer, never in evil territory. Been using the danger room exploit ever since I heard of it. The most advanced mechanical thing I've ever done was a colloseum with a plethora of levers and drawbridges.

Today, I was stupid enough to think I could consider myself a veteran. So I embarked on a completely flat terrifying glacier, with an aquifer. Lost my one soldier within a few minutes to a zombie polar bear, the rest managed to dig in within the underground igloo I made in the meantime.
From there on, I simply had no idea what to do at all. Digging the stone anywhere below the ice layer just revealed water, so no stone for me. No wood either, except for the three from the wagon. No place to farm, barely any life on the map... I lasted about an ingame month before I realized it was completely hopeless for me.

Back again in the safety of my old fort. Definitely going to try that again, though, because it was a lot more fun than the huge ass megaforts with ~10fps, 250 dwarves and too much metal to handle, that I usually do.

[DrKillPatient]

Embarked in a taiga to test the snow leopards / giant snow leopards I modded in (also added a variant of mammoths from genesis), and I seem to have set the population for the giant snow leopards to some incredibly high number. As soon as I hit <enter>, all seven dwarves were set upon by a cloud of what looked like hundreds of angry felines. Roughly 10 seconds of evisceration before the fort crumbled.

[Loud Whispers]

Never had as quick defeats as these guys, but the quickest one yet was just earlier today (not counting those games where you leave instantly. That's not losing fun, that's just being picky about locations).
About an hour. I'm still somewhat of a newbie at this game, so most forts have so far been borderline-paranoia safe with death by FPS or HFS exclusively. Never embarking without multiple metals, never on an aquifer, never in evil territory. Been using the danger room exploit ever since I heard of it. The most advanced mechanical thing I've ever done was a colloseum with a plethora of levers and drawbridges.

Today, I was stupid enough to think I could consider myself a veteran. So I embarked on a completely flat terrifying glacier, with an aquifer. Lost my one soldier within a few minutes to a zombie polar bear, the rest managed to dig in within the underground igloo I made in the meantime.
From there on, I simply had no idea what to do at all. Digging the stone anywhere below the ice layer just revealed water, so no stone for me. No wood either, except for the three from the wagon. No place to farm, barely any life on the map... I lasted about an ingame month before I realized it was completely hopeless for me.

Back again in the safety of my old fort. Definitely going to try that again, though, because it was a lot more fun than the huge ass megaforts with ~10fps, 250 dwarves and too much metal to handle, that I usually do.

PUT YOUR VETERAN HAT BACK ON, AND MARCH  RIGHT ON INTO THAT DAMN GLACIER!!!

Train hard, win easy, lose fun.

[Virodhi]

Short and miserable for my dwarves, no doubt, but it took about ten minutes real time due to nosediving fps. Flat volcano just below the surface of a glacier, on a world that had been modded to be much colder than usual. I honestly think my dwarves were already dead by the time the meltwater flash-froze around them. I like to think some industrious yeti will come upon the site and dig out some delicately steamed treats for himself.

[C0NNULL]

... I'm still somewhat of a newbie at this game, so most forts ...

Today, I was stupid enough to think I could consider myself a veteran.

I see what you did there, do you? *watches incoming flaming cows and ducks* [Ducks down, not incoming flaming ducks and cows. Thought I'd clear that up before you asked.]

[darthsuegar]

Back in 40d, my shortest was probably one of my first fortresses, the first time I met a cave crocodile...after that, most of my "short" fortresses were due to me embarking with no food or drink thinking I could easily get both of those. Oh boy, how wrong I was.

[Prixel]

My FIRST time playing.
*embark*
Oh hey! There are my dwarves!
....what does those "b"s stand for by my dwarves?
*unpauses*
Urist Mcminer has bled to death!
Urist Mcminer2 has bled to death!
Urist Mcfarmer has bled to death!
Urist Mcfarmer2 has bled to death!
Urist Mcfarmer3 has bled to death!
Urist Mclumberman has bled to death!
Urist Mcfisherdwarf has bled to death!

[Ubiq]

The shortest one I ever had was self-inflicted. Since we have freezing trees, I added in other temperatures as well with one of them being the Lava Dome, which has a constant temperature of 12000. I embarked with a few Lava Dome logs as a test and the entire middle section of the map burst into flame instantly because it was a grassland.

Outside of that, I've embarked in the middle of a group of Giant Capybaras before; they're actually worse than Giant Badgers thanks to their ability to cross rivers and ponds to kill your dwarves.

[Loud Whispers]

The shortest one I ever had was self-inflicted. Since we have freezing trees, I added in other temperatures as well with one of them being the Lava Dome, which has a constant temperature of 12000. I embarked with a few Lava Dome logs as a test and the entire middle section of the map burst into flame instantly because it was a grassland.

Outside of that, I've embarked in the middle of a group of Giant Capybaras before; they're actually worse than Giant Badgers thanks to their ability to cross rivers and ponds to kill your dwarves.

Giant badgers come without number, and come with fury.
Rivers freeze. Badgers do not.
>Urist Mcminey cancels dig, interrupted by Tyrannosaurus Badger<

[Putnam]

Spoiler: Huge screenshots (click to show/hide)

[Urist Imiknorris]

I knew someone would have an immediate river thaw story.