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Author Topic: Roll to Seek the Grail!  (Read 51024 times)

lawastooshort

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Re: Roll to Seek the Grail! Turn Seven: The Grail!
« Reply #75 on: October 17, 2011, 12:31:04 pm »


EDIT: FANART!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I can do the other two later.

Awesome. If wolfchild posts I'll try to do another turn this evening, i.e. 3-4 hours time.
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Ultimuh

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Re: Roll to Seek the Grail! Turn Seven: The Grail!
« Reply #76 on: October 17, 2011, 12:32:14 pm »

You don't want to see it anyway. >.>

So the sheer ugliness made that server crash.. I think I better avoid it then..
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SeriousConcentrate

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Re: Roll to Seek the Grail! Turn Seven: The Grail!
« Reply #77 on: October 17, 2011, 12:54:37 pm »

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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SerCon Shorts: This Is How You Do It - Twenty-three one minute or less videos of random stupidity in AC:U, Bloodborne, DS2:SotFS, Salt & Sanctuary, and The Witcher 3.

Ultimuh

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Re: Roll to Seek the Grail! Turn Seven: The Grail!
« Reply #78 on: October 17, 2011, 01:53:23 pm »

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

THE HORROR!

Seriously however, I don't think he looks so bad.. I have seen.. worse..
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wolfchild

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Re: Roll to Seek the Grail! Turn Seven: The Grail!
« Reply #79 on: October 17, 2011, 04:36:05 pm »

In his rage Meynard starts swinging his warhammer, o specific target/b]
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You really can both sig it.
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lawastooshort

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Re: Roll to Seek the Grail! Turn Eight: Prepare the Trebuchet!
« Reply #80 on: October 18, 2011, 04:17:50 am »

Eighth turn!
England; the Dark Ages; Castle Lombard; the hour of the toad.


Run to a different part of the castle and hide somewhere! While I'm there, find something to inconspicuously dress up in. A...

...DISGUISE.


“Have at thee, scoundrel! You have smashed our Grail!” cries the French doorsergeant-at-arms as he draws his sword at Sir Feyman the Judging, Slayer of the Black Knight and Smasher of the Grail.

Sir Feyman bravely ducks under the Frenchman’s sword and flees! The French men-at-arms turn quickly about to follow, but Sir Feyman cunningly pulls a nearby rug from under their feet! They fall! In the confusion the intrepid infiltrating knight makes good his escape, finding another part of the castle in which to hide. As the alarm bell rings in the castle keep and men-at-arms start to rush about, Feyman searches for some way to disguise himself. A… disguise, perhaps, he thinks to himself.

After a couple of minutes further of frantic yet watchful searching he finds himself in the castle barn – and there, in the corner behind several resting cows, he finds a cowsuit in which to conceal himself. He hurriedly jumps inside and fastens the fastenings, and stands there cowlike amongst the interested bovines [6]. Several searching soldiers rush into the barn and prod the hay with their halberds, but to no avail! The fiendish Englishman cannot be found!

They leave, and from within the barn he hears the rushing about of armed men as the castle prepares for battle; he hears the cries, “Man the walls!”, “The English are coming!”,  “Prepare the trebuchet!”

Before he realises what is happening, Sir Feyman the Judging, Slayer of the Black Knight, Smasher of the Grail and Imitator of Cows is being led out into the castle grounds amongst a small herd of cattle, accompanied by several soldiers and a small group of geese. There are many Frenchtypes about; he decides the best course of action would be to play his role to the utmost: perhaps the cows will be led out to market! He will escape! He convincingly lets out a gentle moo.

In his rage Meynard starts swinging his warhammer, no specific target

Outside the castle walls, Sir Meynard realises his falcon does not seem to be returning. With his hangover gone, he uses his new-found clarity of mind to fully explore his blinding rage: he swings his warhammer frenziedly about his head! He fells a nearby tree! It falls upon him! It cracks his brain! It smashes his leg! Sir Meynard is knocked unconscious [1].

State Entered! Unconscious!
Wound Acquired! Broken leg!

Sir Keardwall had returned to his place before the walls after losing at an arm wrestling match. He had been distracted, of course, by his opponent’s sheer ugliness...
So he was standing there when he heard something fall from above.
"Hark! The cowardly wretches in the castle are throwing things at us!" He bellows, drawing his sword. Then he notices what it is, and his eyes bug with rage. "The Grail! The bastards have thrown the Grail at us, the ultimate act of vile treachery!" He charges roaring at the doors again, this time not taking 'no' for an answer. "They have defiled a Holy relic! They shall all be killed!"

Filled with furious and righteous anger, for there is no other kind available to a Knight of the Round Table who has just witnessed the destruction of one of the Seven Holy Relics of Our Lord, except perhaps burning and vengeful righteous doom-bringing anger, Sir Keardwall the Stony, Defeater of Bandits and Loser of Armwrestles, once again draws his blessed sword and charges at the castle door, prepared for glorious vengeance or death.

He hacks upon the door with his sword! He appears to cause a split [4]!

Pulsing with adrenaline from his victory, Sir Conchobar roars with fury at the mistreatment of the Grail. He charges the door in sync with Sir Keardwall.

Beside Sir Keardwall, roaring with fury and the adrenaline of chivalrous armwrestling victory, rushes his companion Sir Conchobar the Gruesome. Wielding his man-weapon Fiddles overhead, he charges at the door. He brings Fiddles crashing down! In one mighty blow [5+1 assistance bonus] he cleaves the door in two! It crumbles, and Fiddles is bruised upon the face.

Behind the door stand half a dozen surprised yet ready Frenchtypes!




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Sinpwn

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Re: Roll to Seek the Grail! Turn Eight: Prepare the Trebuchet!
« Reply #81 on: October 18, 2011, 06:14:08 am »

Sir Conchobar begins the cleaving of the frenchmen, allowing them to get a full view of the face of the man that will end them.
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Yoink

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Re: Roll to Seek the Grail! Turn Eight: Prepare the Trebuchet!
« Reply #82 on: October 18, 2011, 06:15:58 am »

Sir Keardwall, not about to let the foul deeds of these frenchmen go without a good solid tongue-lash, holds one restraining arm before Sir Conchobar as he stares down the enemy from where they stand, just inside the castle.
"You mangy curs! You feeble-minded vinegar-swilling dogs! You have spat upon all that is good and Holy, bared your unworthy buttocks towards God himself, and damned yourselves to an eternity in a place darker than night and more swelteringly hot than a Jerusalem Tavern! Make your peace with God, for shortly you shall meet Him! ...Tell Him Sir Alan Keardwall said hello!"
With that out of the way, he shall chaaaaarge, sword swinging to end their pitiful existences and send them screaming to the afterlife! There shall be no mercy for these blasphemers!
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freeformschooler

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Re: Roll to Seek the Grail! Turn Eight: Prepare the Trebuchet!
« Reply #83 on: October 18, 2011, 07:26:38 am »

Sir Feyman would pretend to be the best of cows, being led out to the market! This ruse not need to last long. And, once at the market, he could escape, and perhaps inquire about the REAL grail! It seems unlikely the French would store a replica if they had the real thing...
« Last Edit: October 18, 2011, 07:37:36 am by freeformschooler »
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scriver

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Re: Roll to Seek the Grail! Turn Eight: Prepare the Trebuchet!
« Reply #84 on: October 18, 2011, 07:35:58 am »

the Lombards
Suddenly Italians?

Also, I like the way this is going. If you keep up the injury rate, there won't be long until Baedocáf can join in on the questing. I wish you the worst of lucks! :P
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freeformschooler

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Re: Roll to Seek the Grail! Turn Eight: Prepare the Trebuchet!
« Reply #85 on: October 18, 2011, 07:37:14 am »

the Lombards
Suddenly Italians?

Also, I like the way this is going. If you keep up the injury rate, there won't be long until Baedocáf can join in on the questing. I wish you the worst of lucks! :P

Pffffffffff screw me and my first-level history class, making me mix up Castle Lombard with the not-so-grand civilization.
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scriver

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Re: Roll to Seek the Grail! Turn Eight: Prepare the Trebuchet!
« Reply #86 on: October 18, 2011, 07:41:34 am »

Oh, I had missed that that was the name of the castle. Sneaky bastards, those Frenchmen.

Also Lombards are totally the Italian equivalent of Normans anyway so weren't you actually just making that comparison, showing off your knowledge about the origins of European tribes and their migrations? ;D
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Love, scriver~

lawastooshort

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Re: Roll to Seek the Grail! Turn Eight: Prepare the Trebuchet!
« Reply #87 on: October 18, 2011, 08:08:52 am »

Their Lord is called Guy de Lombard.

Er. Market. Yes. Quite.
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freeformschooler

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Re: Roll to Seek the Grail! Turn Eight: Prepare the Trebuchet!
« Reply #88 on: October 18, 2011, 08:10:28 am »

Also Lombards are totally the Italian equivalent of Normans anyway so weren't you actually just making that comparison, showing off your knowledge about the origins of European tribes and their migrations? ;D

Yes.

Of all the tribes/civilizations to troll Rome, Lombards had one of the longest runs.

I actually don't know that much about it.
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wolfchild

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Re: Roll to Seek the Grail! Turn Eight: Prepare the Trebuchet!
« Reply #89 on: October 18, 2011, 08:13:01 am »

"Doctors are for weaklings" Maynard would say if conscious, but he is not, you might be able to sneak a bit of doctoring in there if yo do not tell him
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You really can both sig it.
But... That would break the laws of sigging! We can't have everyone running around with the same quotes. IT MAKES THEM UNFUNNY FASTER!
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