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Author Topic: The Dwarven Caring Thread  (Read 4650 times)

melphel

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Re: The Dwarven Caring Thread
« Reply #30 on: October 13, 2011, 11:17:57 am »

Let me tell you the story of Unlucky Bim.  Archers had taken my courtyard, and I sent the axes in to get rid of them.  The squad all popped out of the ground at the same time, but they we're surrounded and outnumbered.  This poor sap got an arrow embedded into his lower spine the second he made it to the surface.  He never saw it coming.  Bim had severe nerve damage, couldn't walk, stand, or grasp...I'd bet he probably couldn't speak either.  He had to crawl around everywhere at this excruciating pace.  It was always easy to pick him out of the crowd, he was the one flashing different colors and barely moving, and yet all his fellow dwarfs just walk past and ignore him.  I felt terrible, because of me, this creature is paralyzed in the worst way, denied the glory in battle of his comrades, denied the satisfaction of mastering a craft, denied a normal fun filled life that every dwarf deserves.  He was just a cripple, miserable about his injuries (which never healed) and miserable about being relieved from duty.  I gave him a grand noble's room (much to the displeasure of my mayor), kept him close to food stockpiles so he didn't have to go very far, and freed him of doing any intensive work.  His sole responsibility was to bring food and water to the wounded, just to keep him preoccupied.  Bim had trouble doing that too.  I'd see him crawling for days on end to the well and back.  I decided to make things easier for him and build another well closer by, almost flooding my fort a third time.

There was a second Bim in my military, this one was known as Lucky Bim.  He was the kind of bastard that manages to charge into a group of enemies, kill one, and then run about in circles until reinforcements arrive, not receiving a single wound in the process.  Lucky Bim had a few notable military achievements, mostly from doing his idiotic charge and run around tactic.  I imagine Unlucky Bim spited Lucky Bim very much.  And perhaps Unlucky Bim had his prayers answered.  One day a forgotten beast showed up, one with deadly blood.  Lucky Bim was a captain at this point, and it was his squad's turn.  They made short work of that ancient monstrosity.  However, Lucky Bim's luck had run out.  He didn't make it up the stairs before his flesh rotted off his bones from the inside out.

I maintain that Unlucky Bim was a hero, and Lucky Bim was an arrogant prick.
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Loud Whispers

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Re: The Dwarven Caring Thread
« Reply #31 on: October 13, 2011, 12:23:48 pm »


Anyways... Well I modded antmen queens to lay eggs (someone said that they did this and in adventure mode millions of them rushed him and things got FUN)... and locked them in a pen where they pumped out A LOT of ant serf babies.
The babies then go into a holding chambre, where gobby snatchers always find their deaths...
And the babies grow up into war antmen.

could you upload the raws for me? (I suck at modding)

On topic, I always have a soft spot for cats. I always do my best to protect them.

When they're *PERFECT* yeah, but right now I've got things to fix, mainly being the damn queens** won't lay eggs in the nest boxes and just live birth hundreds* of baby ants. I suppose it's better because the native underground ants also multiply like MAD, though I don't think that's good for your FPS :/

*Exaggeration
**Set pet value to 1, took 7 queens for my starting 7 dwarves... After the first year they started making babies D:

Also looking back at my murderous dorfy nature (I remember a quote about someone saying dwarf fortress makes them into a homicidal maniac), me, ALL games make me like that, and I've decided to make the fortress of Eden.

A massive sealed fortress (no way in or out), self reliant, and every thing has to be ABSOLUTELY controlled.
I'm considering this 'ol movie I once saw, where everyone lived TOTAL lives of joy, but the population had to be an EXACT number, or the system would crumble. But that would violate my rule of no killing the Eden dwarves :(
On the other hand, I also plan to build a tower with a 20 story drop, with maybe 4 or 8 standing pillars each with their corresponding levers, with the rest of the floor covered in retractable bridges connected to said levers.
If you've guessed it, you're probably smiling with shadenfreude, as I plan to fill it with dwarf children, and only the strongest and fastest will survive. First the slow plunge to their deaths, and secondly the strong must push any others off the edge who stand on their pillar! THen I'm left with only the best recruits for my army!!!
It's BRUTAL GENIUS :D :D :D***
 
***See what I mean, I play my games like some sort of demented karma, for some to live well, others must die hard, and fight harder.

LONG LIVE THE FORTRESS

Di

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Re: The Dwarven Caring Thread
« Reply #32 on: October 13, 2011, 02:04:40 pm »

took 7 queens for my starting 7 dwarves... After the first year they started making babies D:
Wait what?  :o
On topic, I do care of FB's and I try to contain them and drop them something to play with, recently due to my oversight one made it to a meeting hall, resulting misunderstanding has led to death of said beast and one wardog, I wasn't happy even though this one wasn't good bio-weapon, right now there are two captured monsters and 5 roaming free until I prepare chambers for them.
As bearded midgets, I don't care of any dwarf any more, yet still there's 150 of them and still counting.
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http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=103080.0 Fix sober vampires!
http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=91442.0 Dwarven Cognitive Science

FrisianDude

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Re: The Dwarven Caring Thread
« Reply #33 on: October 13, 2011, 03:05:38 pm »

I try to keep married and parental Dwarfs out of my militias and I try to keep -every- Dwarf safe and will coffin and slab any who do happen to snuff it most ignominiously.
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A tiny, foul-tempered humanoid creature that dwells in the evil mountains. They are known to enjoy drinking liquor and will take any unguarded supplies of booze.

xordae

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Re: The Dwarven Caring Thread
« Reply #34 on: October 13, 2011, 03:22:32 pm »

I care about all my dwarves. I hate losing children to thieves the most.
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Loud Whispers

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Re: The Dwarven Caring Thread
« Reply #35 on: October 13, 2011, 06:28:39 pm »

took 7 queens for my starting 7 dwarves... After the first year they started making babies D:
Wait what?  :o
On topic, I do care of FB's and I try to contain them and drop them something to play with, recently due to my oversight one made it to a meeting hall, resulting misunderstanding has led to death of said beast and one wardog, I wasn't happy even though this one wasn't good bio-weapon, right now there are two captured monsters and 5 roaming free until I prepare chambers for them.
As bearded midgets, I don't care of any dwarf any more, yet still there's 150 of them and still counting.

Ant queens.

And ant babies.

And lots of them.

The gobby snatchers practically rained from the sky.

EveryZig

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Re: The Dwarven Caring Thread
« Reply #36 on: October 13, 2011, 09:23:52 pm »

The gobby snatchers practically rained from the sky.
Now I want to use extensive channeling and pressure plates / hatches to make goblins actually rain from the sky onto my military.
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Soaplent green is goblins!

Loud Whispers

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Re: The Dwarven Caring Thread
« Reply #37 on: October 14, 2011, 12:53:33 am »

The gobby snatchers practically rained from the sky.
Now I want to use extensive channeling and pressure plates / hatches to make goblins actually rain from the sky onto my military.

I wouldn't, do you know how hard it is to get blood stains out of your adamantine breastplates without an !!OXY ACTION FACE WASHER!!?!

Dreadful mess.
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