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[jc6036]

Well, now that I've leeched all of the fun out of the meme and it's reasoning, thank you for explaining. I really need to get internet at my home :-/

[G-Flex]

*facepalm* You guys are reading too much into what I said. It seems that you took it literally. I was just saying that humans have certain hormones that give them a large urge to reproduce, and that it was uneccessary during this day and age, and acting upon those urges is completly natural.

You could boil down a lot of human behavior to naturally-selected inclinations that don't necessarily apply very well in the modern era, though. That's hardly limited to sex.

[jc6036]

Yeah, that's how a lot of my outlook on life was formed :-/

[Footkerchief]

Well, there's a number of reasons.

You're seeing someone about that, right?

[Vector]

Well, there's a number of reasons.

You're seeing someone about that, right?

... No?  I mean, why would I?

[scriver]

I assume Foot's refering to reason B. The psychological trauma/consequences/whatever you call it over the smaller and bigger pond.

[Vector]

Ah.  If that eventually evolves into something other than the occasional nightmare and reflexive fear of being touched or stood close to (especially breathed on =/), I'll think about it.  The thing is, I go to the psychologist, they go "... your file says you have Asperger's, as does your behavior," and what next?  All of that falls under clinical variance.  Maybe I'll be in a position where I can actually see someone who can help treat me someday, but right now my health insurance doesn't permit for that because I'm above 18, and no one's interested in working on autistic problems in adults.

If I went back to those folks, I'd probably be back to seeing a postdoc every two to four weeks, because that's the best they're willing to do for someone high-functioning in all the money-making ways.  Besides, I'm not even clinically depressed anymore, or even anhedonic, so I'd be lucky to even get that.

[Tack]

What I find amusing is that I'm the complete opposite. A fair bit of ostracism in high-school, as well as a deep-rural upbringing actually made me very dependent on people. I hug pretty much anyone who is more than a slight aquaintance, unless it's unacceptable for social reasons, etc. And I really don't like going for drives by myself, or sleeping with the door closed.

To that end, I'd say I'm very casual about who I sleep with. I don't do one-night stands, however I feel like that's more opportunity and personality- based, rather than by choice. For me, as long as the friend (wb), girlfriend, partner or drinking buddy isn't liable to get emotionally attached, I'm happy. However, seeing as for most other people sex leads to this attachment, I've been kind of avoiding the whole act for a fair while.

[Vester]

I hug pretty much anyone who is more than a slight aquaintance, unless it's unacceptable for social reasons, etc. And I really don't like going for drives by myself, or sleeping with the door closed.

This is pretty much standard practice here, at least with friends of the opposite gender. The other option is the cheek kiss (beso). I think we all just really like touching people in ways that have no intimate component.

Of course you're really unlikely to see two guys hugging each other.

[Duke 2.0]

 Look up Love Languages for some thoughts on body contact and why some places are odd(Relatively) about it. My family knows my love language is physical touch so every time we bump into eachother hugs happen. Other friends I don't know so much? Banal conversation I guess. My professor gave a good analysis on Bro Hugs though.

[ed boy]

Concerning sex and relationships:

Although I find nothing wrong with sex, I do dislike the emphasis on sex that exists today. Everybody in my demographic considers sex to be a necessary part of a relationship. The concept of a non-sexual relationship does not seem to exist.

Normally I would not have a problem with that, but unfortunately I have a genital birth defect. I would very much like to experience the non-sexual aspects of relationships, and maybe even the sexual aspects, but because of my defect I try to stay away from anything even remotely sexual. I would be more willing to participate in sexual activities if the other person knew about my defect beforehand, but it is a very embarrasing situation, and I would be very keen for 'ed boy has a defective penis' to not become common knowledge among my peers, so I am very reluctant to tell people.

[Alastar]

Personally, I find it slightly bizarre what a big deal sex and sexuality seem to be for most; intimacy, lust and appreciation are very different things to me.

I've avoided sex for years and don't really plan on changing that. While enjoyable, I found the expectations that seem to come with it awkward at best and demeaning at worst.

[Vester]

While enjoyable, I found the expectations that seem to come with it awkward at best and demeaning at worst.

Which expectations?

[Alastar]

That a sex partner has to be one of the more important people to me. That anything deeper than a casual fling assumes exclusivity. That I should be fine being held hostage emotionally. That I am to engage in heavy emotional manipulation myself, lest I be seen as cold and distant. That I am to be in the mood for sex more or less constantly (withdrawal of 'privileges' being supposed to phase me, declining myself being seen as either an affront or sign something is wrong with me). That I'm to agree with my partner on matters where I frankly don't.

I could go on. Not all of these, all the time... but enough, enough of the time to take the joy out of relationships.

*

What irks me most is that society and law mandate some silliness. There's marriage, and then maybe some other common alternatives get blessed with equal status. From a legal point, I'd like 'life contracts' that leave it to me who and how many people are close enough to me that there are formalised mutual responsibilities... independent of whether I share a bed with them or not.

[G-Flex]

That a sex partner has to be one of the more important people to me. That anything deeper than a casual fling assumes exclusivity. That I should be fine being held hostage emotionally. That I am to engage in heavy emotional manipulation myself, lest I be seen as cold and distant. That I am to be in the mood for sex more or less constantly (withdrawal of 'privileges' being supposed to phase me, declining myself being seen as either an affront or sign something is wrong with me). That I'm to agree with my partner on matters where I frankly don't.

I could go on. Not all of these, all the time... but enough, enough of the time to take the joy out of relationships.

That sounds less like you're describing expectations of real-life relationships and more like you're describing those on TV sitcoms. Granted, I suppose some people do treat real life like that.