As Tala watched Pasha speak, she found herself remembering...
The presence of anothers eyes on her back. The Nobleman she was dancing with (The Minister of Finance, naturally) had not been just annoyed, he was close to furious. It had been an interesting night-fending off what seemed to her at the time just another hot blooded young man looking to get under her skirt, trying to placate the Minister so he wouldn't have one or both of them whipped...fun times.
She began to get gifts, soon enough. She had socked the wine away for celebration (especially the Galam Honey Ale, her favorite), threw away the scarves and the flowers...hit and miss. Some of them she placed in the window, knowing how it would excite him to see them. At first it was just a mean little game she was playing, but eventually Tala began to notice the presents became less expensive...and more personal. Such little things-a songbird carved made of blue glass, a box of liqoured Chocolates, Fresh Fruit (how he had known she loved blueberries, she had never thought to ask), an ivory hair clip ironically in the shape of a dragon, even a badly written love poem that was nevertheless written with so much tenderness she kept it with her to this day...it was these small gifts that began to make her think about him as more than just someone looking to take advantage of her, or trying to buy her with money.
Still, she might never have given Pasha a second thought, if Matthew hadn't all but ordered her to...attend to him. Tala knew why-Matthew had made several awkward advances of his own recently, and Tala had expertly rebuffed him. He was a very bitter man.
The desire came quickly once she let herself be more open with Pasha-it made her happy, in a way she hadn't been in a long time. What started as a mission, became personal...and yet, she still withheld herself, knowing that while she was a spy, to reveal as such would be diasaster.
Then, Matthew did it for her. A master stroke-planting a ream of stolen documents in Talas room, in a place where Pasha was sure to find them.
He wasn't quite looking to expose Tala-just scare her very badly, and remind her of how strong he was. Matthew had hired that first assassin to take care of Pasha eventually, no matter what happened.
Tala remembered the look in his eyes as Pasha looked at the papers. There was amounts of anger, shock, betrayal...and something else, which she now knew had been love, warring with his sense of duty and honesty. Tala had been lying naked and unarmed on the bed, and at that moment, she had thought her life was over-either she killed him (which was something she could never have done..at least, with her own hands) or, killed herself after he left to tell the authorities (One strong cup of Jade Maiden tea.)...and naturally, Pasha could have blackmailed her-into doing whatever he wanted her to do.
She had felt her stomach begin to heave at the thought-the choice between death and being forced to...her Mother had been faced with the same choice, and died with what little dignity she had at the hands of a deranged nobleman. (she had never found out the murderers name...yet. Lucky for him) What scared her so badly was the fact she didn't know if she was brave enough to make the same choice.
"I'm a spy. For the Dragon Empire. A traitor. A liar. To you-to everyone. I probably deserve whatever is going to happen to me." Was what she had said to him, on the verge of tears. He had walked close to her then...Tala had tensed, and then Pasha had placed both hands on her shoulders, and whispered into her ear. 'I don't care."
She had been shocked to her core at those three small words. It was his simple act of mercy that had tied them to together-in love, in hardship, in life. For better or for worse...till death do they part.
She caught Pasha's subtle smile. He was always so much braver than her. The Queen spoke..
"Sir Dolgorouki found me, to tell the truth. Whenever me...or my family has needed him, he has always been there for us."