Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Vehudur]

I've had an elven king.

He wasn't interesting and presented all the problems here.

[Necro910]

My city have been granted mountainhome for the first time. I am really happy and all, but I have a major problem:

My king is human.

No, no, I have nothing against humans (there may be humans around), don't worry. The only problem is that the game is DWARF fortress, not HUMAN fortress.
So?
So, I can't assign anything to the king; I can't give him the royal bedroom that took me so long to pimp, I can't assign him in the army to fight naked against a wolf, and I can't ask him to go die of thirst in a burrow deep underground.

So I just have a human king here, laying in the mud, and not being especially happy about it. Also, my duchess is not against the idea of becoming queen herself, at worst.

Can you help me with that? or am I screwed with this bug?

I believe a great man once said...

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

MAGMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

*takes a bow*

That "Who is Necro910" boosted my fame rating about 12 points, didn't it? 

[Makbeth]

My city have been granted mountainhome for the first time. I am really happy and all, but I have a major problem:

My king is human.

No, no, I have nothing against humans (there may be humans around), don't worry. The only problem is that the game is DWARF fortress, not HUMAN fortress.
So?
So, I can't assign anything to the king; I can't give him the royal bedroom that took me so long to pimp, I can't assign him in the army to fight naked against a wolf, and I can't ask him to go die of thirst in a burrow deep underground.

So I just have a human king here, laying in the mud, and not being especially happy about it. Also, my duchess is not against the idea of becoming queen herself, at worst.

Can you help me with that? or am I screwed with this bug?

I believe a great man once said...

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

MAGMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I know that it's always the solution, but that involved a bit too much fun. I had to find something else...

Elf.

Actually, maybe not.  You did try to kennel your king, and when that didn't work you put him out to pasture instead, so that goes a ways towards getting your dwarf-points back.

Magma.  You need moar of it.  No exceptions.

[warwizard]

Pasture him in the royal bedroom, at least till you find out if he makes mandates.

  If no mandates, keep him there, he starts asking for things to be made, send him to pasture next to the FB corral.

  Also see if the Royal consort starts making babies, see if Toady 1 programmed in half-Humans.

[Axedwarf]

Elf.

Actually, maybe not.  You did try to kennel your king, and when that didn't work you put him out to pasture instead, so that goes a ways towards getting your dwarf-points back.

Magma.  You need moar of it.  No exceptions.

I am offended. it's like you think I'm not trying to find a pool of magma for me to die in it gloriously. Also, War Humans are not worth a good war elephant, but it keeps these dumb macaques away.

Pasture him in the royal bedroom, at least till you find out if he makes mandates.

  If no mandates, keep him there, he starts asking for things to be made, send him to pasture next to the FB corral.

  Also see if the Royal consort starts making babies, see if Toady 1 programmed in half-Humans.

Well he's all dead.
I made him a nice slab where he died, just for irony. (the slab was made and engraved before he died.)

[elf-fondling human]

Died of what? I hope it was ‼FUN‼

[Ubiq]

Since he was effective at running off Macaques (which brings up a mental picture of a regally dressed man running and barking at thieving monkeys), I'm guessing it wasn't those.

So... mandrills?

Wait, War Human? So the game actually let you take him to the Kennel and train him, but not slaughter him or was that just a joke?

[Axedwarf]

Died of what? I hope it was ‼FUN‼

not really, the pasture just wasn't made for an human's needs (beer, burgers, long swords and women, I guess, but I'm not an animal caretaker) so he just died here.

Since he was effective at running off Macaques (which brings up a mental picture of a regally dressed man running and barking at thieving monkeys), I'm guessing it wasn't those.

So... mandrills?

Wait, War Human? So the game actually let you take him to the Kennel and train him, but not slaughter him or was that just a joke?

Nope, this was a joke. Dwarves aren't this pragmatic.