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Author Topic: Brazen Macaque  (Read 1636 times)

Girlinhat

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Brazen Macaque
« on: September 09, 2011, 05:54:45 am »

I'd just like to share this with everyone.  I was suffering a macaque raid, yet again.  I've already got a hunter on service, but he's pathetic and slowly training up to be a good deterrent.  Apparently, he's so bad at his job, that the monkeys steal his ammo.  He managed to fire at one of them, only for the macaque to pick up the bolt and run off the map with it.

Girlinhat cancels fort: modding macaque soldiers.
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Karnewarrior

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Re: Brazen Macaque
« Reply #1 on: September 09, 2011, 06:03:28 am »

The monkey CAUGHT the arrow?!

That's hilarious.
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Girlinhat

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Re: Brazen Macaque
« Reply #2 on: September 09, 2011, 06:13:42 am »

Didn't catch, that would be awesome though.  Apparently the dwarf missed (or hit, I wasn't looking that close) and the monkey picked up the bolt.

The Merchant Of Menace

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Re: Brazen Macaque
« Reply #3 on: September 09, 2011, 06:14:53 am »

So the monkey just tore the bolt from his lung, thought "result! :D" and ran off.
Badass.
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Girlinhat

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Re: Brazen Macaque
« Reply #4 on: September 09, 2011, 06:19:59 am »

It's possible that future macaque raids will result in monkies jumping into the bolts, as a means of "catching" them.  I should expect very resistant, scarred, brutal monkies by the end of the year.  I shall start my danger room and bridge traps in preparation for the hulking monkey overlords.

The Merchant Of Menace

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Re: Brazen Macaque
« Reply #5 on: September 09, 2011, 06:21:29 am »

I suspect they'll just send one out to absorb all the bolts, and have an army waiting just out of range to remove them and throw them back.
's how I'd do it.
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Girlinhat

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Re: Brazen Macaque
« Reply #6 on: September 09, 2011, 06:36:15 am »

They're thieves.  They're not throwing them back.  If anything, that one would just hoard them all and keep himself away from the others, made into a sort of legend due to his acquired wealth.  Young macaque will strive to be impaled even half as much as this fuzzy hero.

The Merchant Of Menace

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Re: Brazen Macaque
« Reply #7 on: September 09, 2011, 06:39:33 am »

Well, the next logical step is letting weapons get stuck in them and pissing off with them then.
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CriticallyAshamed

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Re: Brazen Macaque
« Reply #8 on: September 09, 2011, 07:02:31 am »

"The Recruit stabs the rhesus macaque in the body with his adamantine spear, tearing the fat; the adamantine spear is lodged in the wound! A rhesus macaque has stolen an adamantine spear!"

Rage induced cries of "Curse you monkeys!" follow as you realise that you just permanately lost adamantine.
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plynxis

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Re: Brazen Macaque
« Reply #9 on: September 09, 2011, 01:04:46 pm »

"The Recruit stabs the rhesus macaque in the body with his adamantine spear, tearing the fat; the adamantine spear is lodged in the wound! A rhesus macaque has stolen an adamantine spear!"

Rage induced cries of "Curse you monkeys!" follow as you realise that you just permanately lost adamantine.

oh shit that would suck so bad

time to invent flamethrowers. they can catch fire and run off the map with it all they want.
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Girlinhat

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Re: Brazen Macaque
« Reply #10 on: September 09, 2011, 01:09:10 pm »

Many people enjoy catching their wooden craft artifacts on fire.  Thieves will snatch it and burn themselves, and because it's an artifact it will never degrade.

AWdeV

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Re: Brazen Macaque
« Reply #11 on: September 09, 2011, 04:50:08 pm »

Macaques and badgers are the reason why I always bring a hunter and some dogs on embark. Works a charm.

Pretty awesome it nicked a bolt though. Now it's clobbering time!
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acetech09

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Re: Brazen Macaque
« Reply #12 on: September 09, 2011, 06:48:57 pm »

Macaques and badgers are the reason why I always bring a hunter and some dogs on embark. Works a charm.

I just bring 2 mating pairs of war dogs on embark - keeps the wagon safe until I move my junk underground.
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GreatWyrmGold

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Re: Brazen Macaque
« Reply #13 on: September 09, 2011, 08:15:47 pm »

Many people enjoy catching their wooden craft artifacts on fire.  Thieves will snatch it and burn themselves, and because it's an artifact it will never degrade.
And it gives you something dwarfy to do with the most useless, undwarfy artifact possible!
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ulan

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Re: Brazen Macaque
« Reply #14 on: September 09, 2011, 09:01:03 pm »

Grab macaque and do your best to strangle it
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