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[nenjin]

I find that the type of genitalia a person has does not affect my ability to understand that person. They're all pretty much the same degree of confusing.

Oh I don't know. I think gentalia_type_mismatch screws with a lot of people's ability to understand one another.

[Urist Mcinternetuser]

  This thread has too much "just give up and love yourself" advice. Which is good advice, but makes me feel completely hopeless.

 As Peppy once said. "Never give up trust your instincts".

[nenjin]

To me it's kind of a paradox. To really be ready for a relationship, you have to let go of needing one. I've seen many people make poor choices because they were more afraid of being alone than being in a bad or worse relationship. Relationships come and go over time, but learning to love yourself is something you'll always have once you find it.

Because if you think the pain of being alone sucks, just wait for the pain of being dumped or mutually breaking up. There are lows lower than having always been single. The switch from "us" to "me" is brutal.

That's kind of when I woke up to this, along with some advice I read on the internet. It was when I was feeling terrible about losing someone I really cared about that I realized being a whole person, without anyone else, was arguably more important than finding someone to be with. I know that doesn't mean diddly to people that have never been in a relationship. I guess it's just one of those things you have to come to on your own through your own experiences. I just vowed "I'm never going to feel this empty again."

As my dad put it "I finally found the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with when I said "Forget it! I'm done with women!""

[Mindmaker]

This thread has too much "just give up and love yourself" advice. Which is good advice, but makes me feel completely hopeless.

 As Peppy once said. "Never give up trust your instincts".

It's also the man rabbit who said "Do a barrel roll!".
You might want a better advisor 

[ChairmanPoo]

This thread has too much "just give up and love yourself" advice. Which is good advice, but makes me feel completely hopeless.

And you'll get carpal tunnel eventually, if you keep it up.

[GlyphGryph]

This thread has too much "just give up and love yourself" advice

I didn't actually see any of those - most people who said "love yourself" seem to have said it in the vein of it being an integral component in eventually finding a meaningful relationship.

IF you're just going to give up, you don't even need to learn how to do that.

[Urist Mcinternetuser]

It's also the man rabbit who said "Do a barrel roll!".
You might want a better advisor 

   I'll stick with Peppy, because everytime I've trusted my instincts or done a barrel roll things have turned out well. 

[Rooster]

Ok, so... learn "The Game" i guess.
There are literally booth camps to teach guys to be suave Casanovas.

*bracing for impact of hating on this concept*

Nothing gets a girl out of her pants like money does tho. You might want to work on that

[Bauglir]

I am sure there are women for whom that is true, just as I am sure there are guys primarily attracted to money. That doesn't make it a reasonable generalization, or a helpful one (unless sex is all the OP is after, which doesn't sound like the case).

[nenjin]

"The game" is meh. It can be fun for a while and everyone should dabble in it....but I think if you want someone serious, don't play the game with them. Because its founded on dishonesty and short-term rewards. If you're looking for someone that will last you need to show them who you'll be a year down the road and they have to like it....showing them who you are for the 3 hours you're at the bar so you can get in their pants is just a means to an end.

[Grakelin]

What is "The Game", and why do people keep mentioning it in the same posts they admit it is bad?

[Vector]

Nothing gets a girl out of her pants like money does tho.

Counterexample!

What is "The Game", and why do people keep mentioning it in the same posts they admit it is bad?

Pick-up artistry.  It's coercive, generally dishonest, and involves insulting women's appearance in order to play on their insecurities and make them want to make you take it back.

[Grakelin]

Ohmigod, that's the most amazing thing I've ever heard! All this time, I've been spending money on dinners and shows, and it turns out I just have to diss them?

This has been a lifechanging thread for me.

[MetalSlimeHunt]

Spoiler: The guys who advocate The Game on TV also look like this. (click to show/hide)

That outfit should tell you all you need to know about the legitimacy of this as a relationship strategy. 

[Bauglir]

Which is that it's viable, as long as quality of relationship is not even a factor in your criteria for success. I don't mean a low priority, I mean it has to literally not appear on the list. But if you're really just looking for some sex, and you don't care with whom, and don't care about anybody else's wellbeing, it's probably going to work for you. It's also going to get you a lot more rejections, but that's a necessary consequence of expanding your sample size without regard to anything but that statistically improbable, but nevertheless inevitable, "Fine, I guess."

Man, I really hope that I've indicated my disdain for the method.