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[Sugata-senpai]

A legless one-headed hydra is a good idea... But an eyeless, toothless, legless, gutless one-headed hydra is a better idea.

Problem fixed, you may carry on.

[riznar]

Aren't these the kinds of stories that result in the maimed/trapped creature developing psychic powers?

[Angry Bob]

Aren't these the kinds of stories that result in the maimed/trapped creature developing psychic powers?

Are you implying that this would be a bad thing?

FUN FOR THE FUN GOD

[*Poster*]

You, sir. You understand what it is to be a Dwarf.

I salute you.

[DoctorMonch]

Aren't these the kinds of stories that result in the maimed/trapped creature developing psychic powers?

I may just name the fort something along the lines of Silent Hill, thanks to this post.

[riznar]

Hell is radio static.

[DoctorMonch]

You think humans are the ones prone to great ambition?

I take it you've never met a Dwarf.

With them, ambition is an understatement. These dwarves are prone to ambitions forged by the gods themselves. Ambitions beyond the grasp of any other living creature on the face of the planet.

"Gutter" Candyharvest, an axedwarf , stepped forth from the shadows. He would be the prophet from whom the dwarves gained their infamy.

His mission started as a simple one.
Go to the abandoned fortress.
Grab his equipment.
Ignore any and all who stand in his path.
Not a big deal, right?

Well that was specifically forged equipment... for a very specific task.

See... Gutter was no mere mortal. Gutter was a child of the god "Dan the Wicked Raunch", sent to the planet to fulfil a prayer of the Dwarven General, Stukos Boltname.

The general... he wanted revenge.

 A dragon, in its mindless wrath, had destroyed their sacred mountainhomes, and devoured their king.

The general understood, however, that with his current manpower, he had no chance to get revenge upon the megabeasts. He could barely defend his people.

This is why Dan the Wicked Raunch intervened.

The god of depravity, and lust.

Depravity that can be easily witnessed, through the actions of his disciple.

...

Now, I won't bore you with the details of how Gutter did it all, but I'll let you know what he did.

He sculpted those beasts to Dan's whim.



Nobody would know exactly who carved these beasts up, but Gutter didn't need praise. When he had finished his task, he walked back to the human town where he would take refuge during his months of work.

He settled down, and spent the rest of his life in peace, defending the village from any beasts who dared show their face near him.

The beasts wouldn't dare do something so foolish, however.

Who knows what fate he would submit them to.

[Oliolli]

Wow, that is just excellent. Definitely worth a *bloated tuber biscuit*.

[DoctorMonch]

I seem to be having some issues with the limbless bronze colossus, now.

He likes to attack my dwarves, who easily run away from him, but continue getting job cancellations.

[Oliolli]

So, how exactly does a paperweigh move itself? Or can it even?

[Sir E Brum]

If you lop all the limbs off of a creature, it can still kind of sadly wiggle around, which I imagine is like watching a human torso with a head attached crawl on the floor by twisting itself. I've had adventurers who inexplicably were legendary ambushers and biters, despite/because of no limbs remaining. I like to imagine Obok Meatgod shimmying about in the tall grass, preparing to viciously gum (teeth were gone too) the hell out of some wolves.

[DoctorMonch]

I understand that I haven't updated, and here's why.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I made this in about 5 minutes in flash.

...

This is what kept happening to the fortress.

The hydras were easily sealed away in their little hydra hole, but the bronze colossus is proving to be an issue...

Even with no arms or legs, it finds a way to rush up and kill my dwarves with relative ease.

So yeah.

 

[Varnifane]

*claps*

[Kurtisk1]

That sounds pretty time consuming.

[DoctorMonch]

That sounds pretty time consuming.

It only took two nights of work, surprisingly.