Early evening, Wednesday 10th April, 1906.The ghost of Thomas Wallace places all his knowledge of the dueling arts into Mr. Geenyton to prepare him for the upcoming duel. Also, make the Bagpipes play some Epic Scottish Battle Music.
Rip some pages out of the French-English dictionary to stop the bleeding and call for some help out of this cage.
“Help! I say – I’m in a bloody cage, don’t you know! Oh, blast, one appears to be bleeding quite profusely from one’s leg. Bother.”...Rather than ruin yet another suit with his somewhat callous propensity for bleeding on the work of innocent tailors,
Mr Smith wisely decides that mere freedom is not all that it might be cracked up to be. He snuffles about his evening jacket pockets and pulls out his finally useful French-English dictionary. Frenziedly tearing the poor volume to shreds, he applies it with some manly spit, sticking it furiously about his leg until the blood is soaked up, and his leg entirely immobilised! He very slightly resembles some kind of Egyptian mummy!
Suddenly, stowed somewhere about his person, his bagpipes start playing some epic Scottish battle music of their own accord!
Leaping with terror at this strange and sudden development, the startled Mr Smith flees at top speed from the bloodcurdling sound, only to trip upon his mummified leg and smash his head open on a nearby metal bar!
Wound Acquired: Mr Smith:
Smashed Open Head!Retrieve hat, attempt last action.
Spying his poor top hat in its undignified position upon the ground,
Mr Wellington resolves to retrieve it and finally slay everyone present via the medium of tophatterang-fu! He ceases his jacket-dusting-off and dashes into a particularly handsome forward roll, coming to his knees just before his top hat which he then slams back into its rightful place on his noble head. Staying in a crouch, Mr Wellington looks about! He looks left! He looks right! He spies no foe bar the evil-looking
Baron von Honkerkliffen, but remains intent on circulating his top hat in the most violent manner possible, hoping to explode the heads of as many Vikings as can be caught!
...With a twitch of his wrist Wellington flings out his top hat, splicing apart Baron von Honkerkliffen’s left eye, tearing off his nearby ear, and sending him flying to the floor in a stumbling heap!
Wound Acquired: Baron von Honkerkliffen:
Spliced Open Left Eye!Wound Acquired: Baron von Honkerkliffen:
Torn Off Ear!Wellington stands aghast at this hideous breach of dueling protocol, but watches with great satisfaction as his tophatterang returns at great speed. It flies in a great arc about the rocky cavern, shearing the flesh off
Sir August von Fersen’s left arm as it passes the first gentleman before heading towards the astonished
Mr McGeenyton!Wound Acquired: Sir von Fersen:
Sheared Open Left Arm!He is rooted to the spot as the top hat comes towards him and smashes him directly in the face, heavily bruising his mouth through his robosuit!
Wound Acquired: Mr McGeenyton:
Heavily Bruised Mouth!Wellington dodges to the ground as the top hat swings round for a final run, narrowly missing the Englishman and careering dangerously fast towards the temporarily severely disabled
Mr Smith: at the last second it veers to the side, and slices through the entire side of steel cage! The cage collapses to the floor on one side: Mr Smith is freed!
Caddishness Increased! Mr Wellington: Breached Dueling Protocol!
”Gosh!”
”Gosh and blast! Oh no, wait – I have an idea!”While resting my wounds, focus intensively on lending all my strength to my comrades through the supernatural, brotherly bond all Agents in the Service of the King are connected by!
...Overcome with mild joy at the sight of his freed comrade,
von Fersen realises that decisive action is required if the evil threat is to be defeated. He crawls into a corner, and focuses intensively on helping his comrades through some kind of supernatural means! His face quickly takes on an expression of extreme constipation as he strains his mental faculties to near breaking point!
Accept challenge. Enter Fisticuffs mode.
”I… I’m terribly sorry, old chap. I don’t know how I can possibly excuse my companion’s atrocious behaviour – would you care for a duel? It’s the very least I can do.””Mein Gott! It is inexcusable! Not only do you English types slice off my ear under the pretence of preparing to duel, you then do me the dishonour of challenging me to a duel whilst I await your duel! I tell you vot, mein friend: I see your duel, and I raise you a duel! Ha! I vill duel you twice at once! En garde! I warn you: I fight to the death, and I am an expert at this kind of thing!””Oh, blast.”Mildly blinded by rage as well as his eye being spliced apart,
Baron von Honkerkliffen is nevertheless rather speedier than the slowed-by-shame
McGeenyton! He gets in the first blow with his rapier, and
...strikes a vicious stab towards thin air!
Suddenly, McGeenyton realises he doesn’t appear to possess a suitable dueling weapon, and will have to fight with whatever he has to hand! Luckily, he immediately remembers he’s in a robotic spider suit, and swipes with one of his eight legs towards the prancing Prussian,
...who avoids the blow with a cunning duck. With a smart roll to his right to take advantage of his duck, Baron von Honkerkliffen thrusts upwards with his rapier towards McGeenyton’s armoured groin,
...striking viciously and puncturing McGeenyton’s guts!
Wound Acquired: Mr McGeenyton:
Punctured GutsThe angered Englishman recoils in horror: ‘twas a close run thing! He clambers ahead in a ball of steam and metallic spider legs towards the brave baron, and swipes two arms forwards to clasp him in a spiderbotic wrestling hold,
...and calls upon all his suddenly increased dueling knowledge to begin crushing the air out of the German infidel!
Baron von Honkerkliffen attempts to struggle free,
...but cannot!
Mr McGeenyton squeezes and squeezes, and the German turns purple! He attempts the only thing any sane man would do,
...and pokes the Englishman in the eye with his rapier, bruising the eye, but missing the brain!
Wound Acquired: Mr McGeenyton:
Bruised Eye!McGeenyton bleeds heavily within his suit of robospidersteel, but can’t quite manage to squeeze the baron to death, so casually attempts to rip off one of his arms:
...alas! the robospider suit malfunctions, and he rips off the spidersuit’s arm!
Robospider Suit Malfunction Bonus Acquired: Mr McGeenyton:
Arms remaining: 7.The German wriggles free with his last but one breath, and hacks through the resulting hole with his rapier,
...breaking the arm and tearing the flesh! With a sudden burst of supernatural energy,
...McGeenyton picks up the severed spidersuit arm, and thrusts it at Baron von Honkerkliffen. It penetrates his spleen! It shatters his heart! It punctures his lung! It pokes out his spine! It ruins his suit!
Baron von Honkerkliffen is struck down!
Wound Acquired: Mr McGeenyton:
Broken Arm!Gentlemanliness Increased: Mr McGeenyton: Duelist Extraordinaire!
… … … … … …
Beyond the corpse of the baron lay the depths of the Viking fortress, and, specifically, a junction of dank dark corridors heading off in various directions. From left to right the junctions appear to have signs written in Viking under the more easily decipherable numbers 1, 2, 3 and 4.… … … … … …
Item Acquired! Mr McGeenyton: A Promise to Acquire Two New Suits! (eight turns remaining)
Current Gentlemen
Player: areyoua
Name: Winston Smith, American
Bio Status: Mummified leg: – 1 to leg use. -1 to intelligence.
Inventory: A Walking
Bat Stick Capable of Serious Bodily Harm, an Umbrella, a Fine German Sword,
Masterwork Top Hat,
Mysterious Ancient Bagpipes, French-English Dictionary, Smashing Coat (extra warm).
Wounds: [HP:85/100] |
Smashed Open Head!Skills: We Carry Large Sticks,
Knowledge of the English Gentleman,
Walking Bat Stick Deflection,
A little more expertise in the art of walking bat stick deflection,
Baseball Cricket Fatality!,
We Never Lost a War! (yet),
Fallible Pedant!,
Fatally Bad Doctor!,
Not a Zoologist!,
Prone to Embarassing Sartorial Malfunction! Gentlemanliness: 9.Caddishness: 4.
Player: _DivideByZero_
Name: William Wellington, Gentleman
Bio Status: -1 pain penalty.
Inventory: Two Fine Dueling Pistols, Stone Throwing Discs, a War-Elk.
Wounds: [HP:90/100] |
Fractured Testicle! |
Heavy Face Bleeding!Skills: A Quite Talented Salesman,
Natural Born Top Hat Wearer,
Top Hat Black Belt,
Airship Pilotage,
Top Hat Acquisition,
Extraordinarily Convincing.
Gentlemanliness: 11.
Caddishness: 1.
Player: Geen
Name: Henry McGeenyton, Gentleman
Bio Status: -1 to ranged attacks. -1 to left arm. -1 to mouth use.
Inventory: Monocle, Double Barreled Walking Stick With Tartan Trim, Grappling Hook Wristwatch, Tin of Loose Tea Leaves, A Promise to Acquire Two New Suits! (eight turns remaining),
Robospider Steam Suit.Wounds: [HP:65/100] |
Heavy Head Bleeding! |
Broken Arm! |
Bruised Eye! |
Punctured Guts |
Heavily Bruised Mouth!Skills: Graceful combat,
Monocles,
Refined Accent,
Particularly Calm,
Tedious Oratory! Gentlemanliness: 15.Caddishness: 3.
Player: scriver
Name: Sir August von Fersen, Noble Young Swede
Bio Status: -1 left leg penalty. -2 left arm penalty. -1 to dodging.
Inventory: Umbrella-Sword, Copy of Gentleman Hunter’s Weekly, Fine Hunting Rifle,
Masterwork Gold Eye Patch, Finely Crafted Pipe, a Magnum Revolver, Exquisitely Crafted Letter of Apology, Forster's Norwegian-Swedish Dictionary (19/24).
Wounds: [HP:91/100] |
Broken Left Arm! |
Broken Left Leg! |
Fractured Guts! |
Sheared Open Left Arm!Skills: Enthusiastic Hunter,
Well-Versed with Pipes,
Tremendous Orator,
Masterful Pipe Holding,
Fleetfooted Tenacity of the Swedish Elk,
It Runs in the Family,
Knowledge of the Elk,
a Modicum of Knowledge in the Area of Medicine, Published Poet,
Dangerous Misfires.
Gentlemanliness: 16.
Caddishness: 2.
Sorry about the delay, I just got stuck, really. Apologies therefore if anything is not coherent.
Author
Topic: Roll to Be a Gentleman Spy - Chapter Three Part Twenty One. (Read 74756 times)