Chapter Two, Part EightFind out that I have, in fact, no other cigarettes or any other tobacco-based objects on my person. Crave porridge. Then go where that voice actually came from.
Searching with increased desperation about his evening jacket,
Mr John Link is in the unfortunate position of wanting a cigarette, but having no actual cigarettes or similar smoking products on his person [4]. For an inexplicable reason he starts to crave porridge [4]; he dismisses this as some kind of addiction-related side effect, and heads off to the end of the train to chase down the airborne German voice [6]. With the speed of a Northern Irish lynx he climbs on to the roof of the train and sprints along as fast as he can, just managing to jump towards the rope ladder as the Zeppelin starts to drift away to the East and away from the train.
He grabs hold and starts to ascend [4].
Search around, and have another cup of tea.
Back in the tea carriage,
McGeenyton decides to get up and search around, but finds his search confined to this very same carriage when the door leading back to his sleeping wagon appears to be jammed [2-1 Slamming penalty]. He finds little but for the two Germans left in the carriage with him, who are still enjoying a pot of tea and further conversation about the magnificent Elk and seem to appreciate it very little when the Englishman attempts to search on and under their armchairs. He returns to his seat and asks the butler for another cup of tea [4]. In due course the tea arrives, and the Englishman finds it remarkably good. Indeed, if there is anything like a good cup of tea, McGeenyton muses, it is surely a second good cup of tea. His tea-based reverie is suddenly interrupted by the unexpected sound of bagpipes blaring from the neighbouring carriage.
Go back to my quarters and blow on the bagpipes. Again.
The unexpected sound is, of course,
Winston Smith, blowing upon the bagpipes that he has every reason to believe have some mysterious quality about them, having been informed so at no less an occasion than the funeral of their previous owner. They do certainly seem easy to blow out a good tune on, as without very much practice, or indeed musical ability at all, Smith seems able to give a rather stirring rendition of
Hose of Argyle for several minutes until a butler knocks on the door [5].
The butler points out that it is rather unseemly, at this kind of hour, to be producing such a noise, and would sir mind reducing the volume just the slightest amount, out of respect for our other guests? Apart from that nothing else of great import seems to happen. Perhaps a different air would have been more appropriate.
Follow Smith.
“G” seems rather disappointed at this turn of events, enjoying as he was what is a rare treat for a gentleman of his Germanic persuasion. For “G” has followed Smith out of the tea wagon at considerable speed, all but slamming the door shut behind him [6], whether to take his chance at escaping before finding himself locked in again, or to avoid being left alone in the tea wagon with two of his potentially quite curious countrymen.
Encouraging Smith to press on in his artistic endeavours, “G” requests that he try a performance of
Flowers of the Forest. Smith sets out once again on his musical course, but, even with an enthusiastic audience, finds it a tricky melody to master [2+1 Enthusiastic Audience bonus], and it comes out quite wrong, and with no effects beyond leaving him out of breath and “G” a little musically dissatisfied. Perhaps it’s just not the right moment, Smith wonders. After all, one can never be sure with this kind of thing.
Twirl my hat around with my finger.
High up in the airship that even as we speak is beginning the journey back to Germany with a dangling gentleman in tow,
Mr Wellington twirls his hat around with his finger in an unspeakably English and menacing way [5].
Point umbrella at one Prussian and the revolver at another.
"Ah, gentlemen, let me introduce myself - I am August von Fersen, and this is my friend and colleague, Mr Wellington. A pleasure to meet you. Now, I do believe I recall a promise of Tea and Biscuits?"
Von Fersen’s polite introduction is not well received [1+1 Menacing Hat Twirling bonus], despite its gentlemanliness. The three non-piloting Germans attack!
However, the gentleman spies are ready for this treachery. As one German draws a sword, von Fersen blasts him with his fiendishly outsized revolver, knocking him backwards but leaving him otherwise unscathed, unlike the now holed wicker basket [2+1]. Another fishes a revolver out of his pocket and is just about to aim at the Swede when Wellington suddenly leaps in, top hat bearing hand outstretched, and slices off his arm [5+1]! It falls to the floor as the German clutches the stump with his good hand.
The third German advances on von Fersen, who swings wildly with his umbrella-sword and misses [2]. The German, sabre drawn from its scabbard, aims a mighty overhead blow at the Swede, who parries with his umbrella-sword and throws the unweighted fiend overboard [6]. He plummets to the ground a hundred feet below! He is struck down!
The blasted over German gets to his feet as the pilot ties the wheel in place, and turns round with a shotgun in his hands.
“Surrender!” he shouts out over the din of the train below and the engines above, “This is my ship and I will accept no trespassing! Surrender or die!”
In carriage 1 are McGeenyton and two Germans, all enjoying tea.
In carriage 2 in a sleeping wagon are Smith and “G”, both trying to enjoy the bagpipes.
Hanging onto a rope ladder at the back of the airship is Link.
Von Fersen and Wellington are on board the Zeppelin with one German with a sword, one German pilot armed with a shotgun, and one German with one arm. The Zeppelin is heading towards Germany.
The train is not very far from Switzerland; once the Zeppelin combat is all finished the train will probably pull in at the station, unless something goes awry.