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Author Topic: Dwarven... "Child Care"  (Read 637627 times)

Orky_Boss

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #690 on: April 08, 2012, 08:43:07 pm »

I have way too little experience to help with this endeaver, but the least I can do is wish you luck.

Good luck, and here's a pair of socks for the effort!
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FalseDead

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #691 on: April 08, 2012, 09:21:51 pm »

That's entirely against the point of this whole... what the fuck are we doing here again?

Super-soldiers

Super-Soldiers created by !!SCIENCE!!

Deformed, Immortal, Traumatized, Fireproof, socially stunted Super-Soldiers Created by !!SCIENCE!!
(That happen to make children useful and FUN)



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Reudh

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #692 on: April 08, 2012, 09:27:36 pm »

Once I've managed to stabilise my current fort, Operation Dr. Gurl Inhaat shall be a go.

Sabreur

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #693 on: April 08, 2012, 10:15:17 pm »

The core of the problem is the fragility of the children test subjects.  Anything dangerous enough to provide useful training is also dangerous enough to give a parent a "Lost a child to tragedy recently" thought in short order.

If I can capture one, I intend to experiment with werecreatures, as I believe their regeneration is the key to the 'fragility' problem.

Step 1:  Isolate the test subjects as quickly as possible to prevent friendships and acquaintances from forming.  This phase is fairly pleasant - each subject will be given as many luxuries and happy-thought generators as possible without compromising the test or annoying the nobles.

Step 2:  Capture a werecreature.  Preferably more than one.  Ideally, this should be a fairly non-threatening werecreature - a weregopher or something.  While were-badgers would be spectacular, we need something that a test subject is capable of surviving contact with.  Unfortunately, I'll probably have to settle for whatever I can catch.

Step 3:  Chain the werecreature in the center of a 4x4 room with one locked exit door and a retractable bridge roof.  The door leads to a training cell, which will be filled with turkeys, wild dogs, whatever.  This ensures that there is no 'safe' tile in the room.

Step 4:  When the full moon hits, drop the test subject into the room.  Keep the door locked until the subject is either bitten or a moot point.  Assuming the subject survives, unlock the door and let the child flee into the perceived safety of its new cell.

Step 5:  Proceed with training.  Every month, the subject will turn into a werebeast, probably killing all the training animals, but more importantly regenerating all wounds.  It might be useful to have a 'emergency escape' option for the cell to allow critically wounded test subjects to flee to a safe place where they can be exempted from testing until after the next full moon puts them back at full health.

While it might be possible to micromanage the system to keep the livestock alive, that's more of a pain than it's worth to me.  The whole point is to keep the test subjects out of the way while simultaneously training them to be useful.  I'll probably just breed as many turkeys as my fps can handle and pasture them directly over the training cells, dumping them in whenever a cell gets too empty to be useful.

One possible deal-breaker is that I'm not clear on what happens to children who are bitten.  We know they can contract vampirism, but can children receive a werebeast curse?  Another problem is surviving Step 4.  I have no idea how often werecreatures 'bite' as opposed to other attacks, and I have my doubts about how well a child can survive even limited contact with one of the weaker werecreatures.  There is a good chance that nothing will survive to reach step 5, which would require scrapping the whole plan.

Sabreur

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #694 on: April 08, 2012, 10:20:36 pm »

I just thought of this, but do non-lethal attacks cause dodging and skill increases?  Like a GCS' webs or something?  Or maybe a forgotten beast with a special attack that causes pain or nausea but no actual injuries?  If those attacks can train dodging, then we could lock the test subjects in a sort of 'shooting gallery' setup and just let them out occasionally for food, water, and rest before sending them back in to play dodgeball again.  It wouldn't train their attack skills, but if it works we could have legendary dodgers at least.

FalseDead

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #695 on: April 08, 2012, 10:45:51 pm »

Couple problems with were-beasts.

A) they transform monthly and If I recall right get building destroyer. rebuilding the Cell every month would be annoying.

B) No Fireproofing. they heal back that fat so it can't be melted off.

C) any were-beast small enough to ensure a child's survival is to small to be useful in combat.


Basically it would be better to have a Exceedingly well trained and Compassionate/empathetic ( the irony) team of Doctors available at ready to rapidly move the child if things get hairy.

Use one pump to pump in 3/7s water then another pump it out, set  to repeat quickly twice per day or 5 time per week so that the cell doesn't rot  and the child gets "washed" raise swimming too

Besides you don't need all of them to survive, just build as many cells as you are allowed children and stuff new ones in whenever the old ones keel over.

Even if 95% are unusable you should still get a near constant stream of soldiers and the ones that go berserk make great training for your regular troops, what better way to harden your main infantry then by having them put down their own crazed children?

Make it as automated as possible pull a lever and Crazed child 5679 ( they don't need names) goes to training arena rather then proceed to the Vampirization chamber.

The maimed children can be used as food for your vampiric Supersoldiers!
« Last Edit: April 08, 2012, 11:06:28 pm by FalseDead »
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Girlinhat

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #696 on: April 08, 2012, 11:39:01 pm »

Once I've managed to stabilise my current fort, Operation Dr. Gurl Inhaat shall be a go.
The first time was a little cute, but alright, please stop attaching my name to your doings.

Kadzar

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #697 on: April 09, 2012, 12:19:08 am »

That's entirely against the point of this whole... what the fuck are we doing here again?
Generally that's something you should figure out before you trap small children in rooms with ferocious animals.
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Girlinhat

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #698 on: April 09, 2012, 12:30:49 am »

That's entirely against the point of this whole... what the fuck are we doing here again?
Generally that's something you should figure out before you trap small children in rooms with ferocious animals.
I have no idea what you just said, I was too busy staring in awe at your avatar.

Kadzar

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #699 on: April 09, 2012, 03:56:34 am »

That's entirely against the point of this whole... what the fuck are we doing here again?
Generally that's something you should figure out before you trap small children in rooms with ferocious animals.
I have no idea what you just said, I was too busy staring in awe at your avatar.
Ah, I take it that this is the first time you've laid eyes on the Outlaw Star. Be thankful I didn't have a picture of it sumo-wrestling other grappler ships, as being exposed to such awesome/ridiculousness so immediately could likely cause brain damage.
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What if the earth is just a knick in one of the infinite swords of the mighty fractal bear?
Glory to Arstotzka!

Reudh

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #700 on: April 09, 2012, 04:28:27 am »

Once I've managed to stabilise my current fort, Operation Dr. Gurl Inhaat shall be a go.
The first time was a little cute, but alright, please stop attaching my name to your doings.

Ah, I wasn't aware you didn't like it. :/

simonthedwarf

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #701 on: April 09, 2012, 05:15:43 am »

Guess you're not interested in this 98 page long fanfic about you and your fortress.
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arphen

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #702 on: April 09, 2012, 06:06:55 am »

ITT: People worshiping girl in hat as a god
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KodKod

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #703 on: April 09, 2012, 08:12:51 am »

ITT: People worshiping girl in hat as a god

In place of the Blood God you will set up a Queen. And she shall not be dark, but beautiful and terrible as the Morning and the Night! Fair as the Sea and the Sun and the Snow upon the Mountain! Dreadful as the Storm and the Lightning! Stronger than the foundations of the earth. All shall love her and despair!
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Tell me what you see. It's a mortal wretched cacophony!
KodBlog: A rage in progress. Updated 20/04/12

Girlinhat

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #704 on: April 09, 2012, 09:51:44 am »

Ah, I take it that this is the first time you've laid eyes on the Outlaw Star. Be thankful I didn't have a picture of it sumo-wrestling other grappler ships, as being exposed to such awesome/ridiculousness so immediately could likely cause brain damage.
Outlaw Star is the reason I'm into Scifi at all.  Well, and Reboot.  We need Toonami back...
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