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Author Topic: Dwarven... "Child Care"  (Read 633522 times)

MarcAFK

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #495 on: January 23, 2012, 11:41:49 pm »
would it be poossible in some way to selectively mutilate the badgers in some way to remove their teeth and claws so they wouldn't get in lucky headshots?
I'm sure you could easily mod in some creatures that have no limbs and are basically huge squishy meat beasts that the child can wrestle with for 2 years, perhaps i could do some science on this issue to determine the survivability of the test subject in such a scenario.
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Quote from: NonconsensualSurgery on March 26, 2012, 09:11:55 pm
They're nearly as bad as badgers. Build a couple of anti-buzzard SAM sites marksdwarf towers and your fortress will look like Baghdad in 2003 from all the aerial bolt spam. You waste a lot of ammo and everything is covered in unslightly exploded buzzard bits and broken bolts.

Mapleguy555

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #496 on: January 24, 2012, 01:00:23 am »
I'll take the huge squishy meat beast.
AND EAT IT.
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Yag Alone

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #497 on: January 24, 2012, 08:53:42 am »
Quote from: MarcAFK on January 23, 2012, 11:41:49 pm
I'm sure you could easily mod in some creatures that have no limbs and are basically huge squishy meat beasts that the child can wrestle with for 2 years, perhaps i could do some science on this issue to determine the survivability of the test subject in such a scenario.

When I read the "create a huge squishy meat beast" part, I had an unsettling felling of deja vu...
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Urist Imiknorris

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #498 on: January 24, 2012, 12:13:41 pm »
Flesh balls might work as squishy training dummies.
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Quote from: LordSlowpoke
I don't know how it works. It does.
Quote from: Jim Groovester
YOU CANT NOT HAVE SUSPECTS IN A GAME OF MAFIA

ITS THE WHOLE POINT OF THE GAME
Quote from: Cheeetar
If Tiruin redirected the lynch, then this means that, and... the Illuminati! Of course!

jcnorris00

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #499 on: January 24, 2012, 02:20:14 pm »
Keep in mind that girlinhat wanted a method that works in vanilla, i.e. without modding.  I'm already breaking this rule by altering the badger's PET_EXOTIC tag to PET, but I can argue that I'm just working around the dungeon master bug.

I'll get back to doing dwarven ‼SCIENCE‼ soon.  I just need to finish one more turn in Civ V.  Just... one... more....
« Last Edit: January 24, 2012, 02:21:57 pm by jcnorris00 »
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My contribution to dwarven science: the dwarven kiddie pool

Urist Imiknorris

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #500 on: January 24, 2012, 04:38:19 pm »
Flesh balls exist in vanilla.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Quote from: LordSlowpoke
I don't know how it works. It does.
Quote from: Jim Groovester
YOU CANT NOT HAVE SUSPECTS IN A GAME OF MAFIA

ITS THE WHOLE POINT OF THE GAME
Quote from: Cheeetar
If Tiruin redirected the lynch, then this means that, and... the Illuminati! Of course!

Babylon

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #501 on: January 24, 2012, 05:33:21 pm »
Quote from: Urist Imiknorris on January 24, 2012, 04:38:19 pm
Flesh balls exist in vanilla.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Looks like it is missing a child tag though.
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Urist Imiknorris

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #502 on: January 24, 2012, 05:39:23 pm »
With an age range of 100-200 years and a decent population number, that's not really very important.
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Quote from: LordSlowpoke
I don't know how it works. It does.
Quote from: Jim Groovester
YOU CANT NOT HAVE SUSPECTS IN A GAME OF MAFIA

ITS THE WHOLE POINT OF THE GAME
Quote from: Cheeetar
If Tiruin redirected the lynch, then this means that, and... the Illuminati! Of course!

Pon_Katt

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #503 on: January 24, 2012, 05:52:58 pm »
Quote from: Andreus on December 30, 2011, 02:11:09 pm
You are objectively the worst person in the history of forever.

I love you, have my babies and train them to be implacable killing machines via this method.
Ok If I sig?
« Last Edit: January 24, 2012, 05:58:04 pm by Pon_Katt »
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My little voice approves.

wierd

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #504 on: January 24, 2012, 06:04:46 pm »
I don't see caste information for male and female either.  This implies fleshballs are asexual. Does dwarf fortress have support for asexual reproduction in creature populations?

(Farming fleshballs would actually be an interesting activity... they don't eat, you would only need 1 to start, they have no bones or hair to clutter up the stockpiles, don't have any guts to make organ meats out of... doesn't even have skin! Just ordinary meat...)

(Modding them to have tannable skin is an interesting idea though. I have this mental image of a kobold invader wearing a fleshball leather loincloth, and for some reason I find that funny. Perhaps he has a small crundle leather bag too.)
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Urist Imiknorris

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #505 on: January 24, 2012, 06:25:48 pm »
Oh god the innuendo.

Currently the game doesn't support asexual reproduction. Hopefully that will be fixed and awesome and stuff soon, especially with things like cave blobs that are basically giant amoebae.
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Quote from: LordSlowpoke
I don't know how it works. It does.
Quote from: Jim Groovester
YOU CANT NOT HAVE SUSPECTS IN A GAME OF MAFIA

ITS THE WHOLE POINT OF THE GAME
Quote from: Cheeetar
If Tiruin redirected the lynch, then this means that, and... the Illuminati! Of course!

MarcAFK

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #506 on: January 24, 2012, 07:36:57 pm »
Looks like Armok really wanted this to happen, i'll start a test fort right now, however i won't be working out the possibility or logistics of flesh-ball farming, i'll just mod them to be embark purchasable.
Added Domestic tag to Fleshballs, also added casts so i could breed them since i wasn't sure if asexual beasts could breed, fort is going quite nicely except gathering of materials is hard because of zombie badgers, i must attempt to get to grips with the military system i guess.
Those flesh balls aren't too bad as first line of defence, they're keeping the badgers occupied and knocking them over frequently.
edit:
I packed all the flesh balls into a cupboard and left them for a while.
I'm getting combat reports with a dozen pages of
"The Flesh ball pushes the Flesh ball in the body but it glances away"
« Last Edit: January 24, 2012, 11:25:11 pm by MarcAFK »
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Quote from: NonconsensualSurgery on March 26, 2012, 09:11:55 pm
They're nearly as bad as badgers. Build a couple of anti-buzzard SAM sites marksdwarf towers and your fortress will look like Baghdad in 2003 from all the aerial bolt spam. You waste a lot of ammo and everything is covered in unslightly exploded buzzard bits and broken bolts.

wierd

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #507 on: January 25, 2012, 01:16:13 am »
I am suddenly reminded of an old comic series I read at a friends house once, called "incal".

The series takes place in a distopian post apocolypse future, (think mtv liquid television aeon flux style), and features a consumer product called a "bio-vita steak".  It is essentially a vicious, genetically engineered meat slab that thrashes and beats you as you try to eat it.

I imagined a fortress of dwarves "domesticating" some fleshballs in this capacity, and eating them raw as a test of dwarfiness.

(One panel I remember distinctly had the series protagonist, Tom Difool, riding a gigantic biovita steak that was accidentally created in an experimental research and development lab to escape the authorities, ultimately riding the undulating slab of flesh down a busy highway. The biovita corporation spun the disturbance as a promotional event, and subsequently had several orders for giant biovita steaks come in.)

Somehow the image of dwarves riding into battle on giant war fleshballs as per that comic panel strikes me as absurdly dwarfy.
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raptorfangamer

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #508 on: January 25, 2012, 10:56:47 am »
ok, now we just need to mod meat sacks to exist AND to become a ton of meat/booze on death?

holy crap
« Last Edit: January 25, 2012, 11:01:28 am by raptorfangamer »
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Archereon

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #509 on: January 25, 2012, 11:47:54 am »
hmmm...Is there any reason you could lock a child in a traditional danger room until they become legendary dodgers, then dropping badgers on them?
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Quote from: Azrayel on July 10, 2014, 09:13:11 pm
I want to tell you they were bad men, cephalo.  I want to tell you that with a better overseer the Fortress never would've gotten so bad someone would get offed in a pointless fisticuffs.
But the sad truth charlie?
It was inevitable.
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