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[Iban]

I don't need 50 god damn wax workers I live on a fucking glacier you are of no value to me there are no bees on this glacier go home.

And stop bringing your god damn guinea pigs to my fortress I've owned guinea pigs they suck ass if I could butcher them and feed them to you I would.

Why are migrants so useless? I literally have an army of farmers and floor detailers because migrants just sit around and do nothing otherwise. My idlers are in the 70s in an 80 person fort. What am I doing wrong here?

[Putnam]

You are doing nothing wrong. This is completely natural. Conscript all the migrants as masons and carpenters and build a giant sacrificial chamber for them.

[krisslanza]

I both hate, and love migrants. I love them early on, when they come in nice, managable waves... then I hate them when the game is like:
"Here, ruin all your work! HAVE 20 MIGRANTS!"

I wish I could just force the game to keep them waves at under 10 or something.

[Iban]

Is there any way to just completely remove immigrant pets in the init files? All I want is a thousand turkeys and one gobbler. That's it. No guinea pigs, no dogs, nothing. Turkeys.

And, yeah, I love it when I get 3 migrants.

"Miner McImmigrant has arrived with his pickaxe, ready to work!"
"Woodcutter McImmigrant has arrived with his axe, ready to work!"
"Farmer McImmigrant has arrived, ready to work the fields"

Then.

"Peasent McImmigrant has arrived with tattered clothes, ready to eat, drink, and socialize! x50"

[trees]

Draft them all in to the military. Every single one of them.

[Number4]

What am I doing wrong here?

You need to apply the correct amount of selection pressure. Or magma. Or, selection pressure by magma.

[Iban]

Draft them all in to the military. Every single one of them.

I'm terrible at managing the military now. I don't know how to do anything. I have one squad with 5 novice marksdwarves, 2 hammerdwarves, and 1 recruit by the first seige.

[Flaming Toadstool]

Atom smash any useless migrants into nothingness. Or use liberal amounts of magma. Or a danger room. I could go on.

[trees]

If you have enough equipment to go around and a big meat industry, make like five squads of marksdwarves and bone bolts. An enormous hail of inaccurate fire is surprisingly effective at incapacitating a siege for your melee troops to clean up. You don't even need to bother with them training, really, they'll get plenty of experience from shooting at goblins.

[ThatAussieGuy]

Atom smash any useless migrants into nothingness. Or use liberal amounts of magma. Or a danger room. I could go on.

"Welcome to the fort, Migrants" *SLAM* "Welcome to the fort, Migrants" *SLAM* "Welcome to the fort, Migrants" *SLAM*

[franti]

I use a two-tier military set-up that works well dealing with migrants.

1st Tier - Professional Soldiers. Well-stocked baracks, Adept Weapon/Armoursmiths, Steel Armour and Bismuth Bronze Maces. Kept happy, fit, and heathly. When one of these dwarves gets hurt, I unforbid the soap stockpiles.

2nd Tier - Useless migrants. Armed in whatever metal I happen to have in abundance, even if that means I have to mod the RAWs to make Sterling Silver an armour material. Sent out first in any fight. Long patrol duty, removed from other dwarves to make their deaths less impacting.

But, in all seriousness, I've abandoned forts because they went from 15 to 40 dwarves/goblins(yay for raw editing) and I didn't have enough food/booze, and didn't care to watch the dehydration/tantrum spiral.

[Kilroy the Grand]

I kill them so my engravers have something nice and tasteful to put on the hospital walls.

[Corneria]

My idlers are in the 70s in an 80 person fort. What am I doing wrong here?

...assign them some labors? There is absolutely no excuse for that

[AWdeV]

Make a stone stockpile somewhere and get haulin'.

It's a pity guineapigs don't produce any meat when butchered. Stray ones would be useful then and I wouldn't feel quite as bad for butchering them. Guineapig skull totems just don't quite work.

[Puresowns]

Gather all the guineapigs and pit them into any cavern level that you feel needs some hands on exploration. Cave crocs will eventually snag them up.