Vote Results:Laharl: keep
Raynor: slums
Gimli: slums/keep
Alex: slums
Max: slums
Sturm: no vote submitted
Part 3a: Into the slums: You are by the gateway to the unsettled areas. The city watch eyes you suspiciously.
: They're eyeing me? I pull out my blade and -
: Don't worry about them, Alex. Let's just keep goin'.
: You enter the monster-crawling slums of Phlan. Small ugly things scurry from beneath your feet. In the distance, an alarm sounds.
: An alarm? I don't mean to sound alarmed, but I am.
: Let it ring, lad.
: Yes, it is most proper that our presence be announced so that we may face our foes with honor, rather than skulking about like cowards.
: I like cow herds. I just don't want to get eaten like one.
: You spy a group of seedy-looking kobolds.
: You spelled my name wrong. It starts with an O. And why am I wearing a purple hat?
: Closest I could come to your Sailor Moon hair. Just pretend there's another pigtail you can't see behind it because of the angle.
: I do NOT have Sailor Moon hair!
: Whatever you say, Meatball-head.
: I draw my sword and salute them, as befitting any foe courageous enough to challenge us.
: Youse humans is salutin' us? Well, maybe we don' need ta kill ya den. But 'da boss don't like youse guys. Give us sumptin' and maybe we'll ferget we seen yas.
: I'll give you something! DIE!!! I cast a spell and kill them all!
: Sorry, Laharl. Alex beat your initiative roll.
: I slide a blade from my hand and slice a kobold into itty bitty bits.
: Ooh, nice roll. He's dead.
: Ok, NOW I cast a spell and kill them all!
: Not yet. Max, you're next.
: Damn it!
: I move in.
: Ok, you take a step and...stop? What's your movement rate?
: Three.
: What could you possibly be carrying that would slow you down that much?
: Stuff. Once I have direct line of sight I'll open fire with my crossbow.
: Ok, go ahead and ro--wait, you don't have any crossbow bolts?
: Oh, yeah. I'll switch to my dagger then. I kind of ran out of money before I got around to buying ammo.
: You couldn't even buy ammo for your crossbow, but you're so overloaded that you can barely move? Let me see your equipment list.
: ...what the hell is all this?
: I don't know, but it all sounded pretty awesome.
: Glaive, guisarme, guisarme-voulge, glaive-guisarme...Max, these are all weapons. Completely obscure weapons from like reference index 87-b of the equipment lists. The polearms in particular should dish out a lot of damage. Why don't you use one of them?
: Nah, I wouldn't know how. Instead I'll spray them with the mace.
: Max, that's not spray mace. That's
a mace. It's a hafted weapon. Basically a big pointy ball of iron on a stick.
: Ok. In that case I'll just stick with the dagger and stab stuff. I know how to do that.
: Why don't you just...wait, you know what? Nevermind. Dagger is fine.
: Cool.
(Several minutes later): So, final battle results, Alex was knocked unconscious, but Max bandaged him up to prevent him from dying of blood loss. Gimli was taken down to 11/14 health and Max down to 5/9.
: Nevermind about that! Gimee the loot! Whadwe get!?!?!
: Everyone earns 22 xp, except for Alex since he was unconscious, and the kobolds had 224 copper and 6 silver.
: What? I don't get xp just because I'm unconscious?
: Nope. And you can't talk either. You're unconscious. Be quiet.
: ...
: And we have no way to heal him. Better get back to town, boys. We may be a little outclassed here.
: I take all the money and strip the kobolds and take their stuff to sell.
: You know, ordinarily I'd be all over that. But I think I'll let you strip the kobolds.
: Ahahha! More gold for me!
: You pass the temple on your way back into town.
: Welcome to the temple of Sune. We will cast cure light wounds on your fallen comrade for a mere 100 gold.
: 100 gold? What's the value of the copper and silver we got from the kobolds?
: A little under two gold, and the kobold gear is worth about 9.
: We have a problem.
: Only if you think I'm sharing the 9 gold with you just to heal that meatshield over there.
: I will glady pay for the healing of my fallen comrade, My Lady.
: No need. He's got 105 gold on him since he never bothered to buy any armor. Something about "roleplaying." Here you go.
:
*Dios!* Thank you for using Sune(tm) for all your healing needs. Come again.
: If we're going to make this work we need to be smarter. Alex, you went down because you weren't wearing any armor. Laharl, why don't you give him one of those suits of leather armor you took from the kobolds.
: "Laharl?" I don't see anyone by that name. I only see OVERLORD Laharl. And OVERLORD Laharl already sold all that junk for 9 gold and you meatshields can't have any.
: Damn it man, if we're going to live through this we need to work together. Alex, here's some gold. Get some gear. Max, sell off that trash weighin' you down, and trade out that crossbow for a more reliable weapon. While you're at it, since you've got a level of rogue go check out the shady corner of town and see what you can come up with. I don't care what, and I don't want to know how, just bring me back something we can use. Sturm, Gimli, you're with me. We'll see if we can hire some help with what funds we have left. Laharl, when we get back you either better be ready to start poolin' resources with the rest of us or I'm going to make my own meatshield out of your skull.
: Ulp! I...oh, very well. I suppose I can at least spare some generosity for my...umm...future subjects.