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[Nil Eyeglazed]

PETA would burn an effigy of you on a stake, but it doesn't seem too absurd for a practicing doctor to cause some wound to an animal and then fix it up for practice.  Be useless for diagnosis though, since the animals are significantly different anatomically.

A friend of mine was deployed as a medic to Iraq.  Before they went, they had what they called a "goat lab."  Nothing officially sanctioned, of course.

You'd be surprised at how similar people are to other mammals.  Wouldn't trust a vet to cut a tumor out of me, not with any better options around, but as far as diagnosis goes, a lot of it relies on symptoms that people share with most mammals.  There are specific details to each animal, of course-- vital signs are different, for instance-- but we have the same organs mostly, that provide the same functions, and lead to the same signs when things go wrong.  Even medical treatment is similar, although of course doses differ.

Of course, DF deals with even more primitive medicine that we've got today.  A cut's a cut, and a fracture's a fracture.  Even DF surgery seems to deal mostly with excision of necrotic flesh.  People are easier to treat than animals-- they'll describe what's wrong, and they'll even follow instructions some of the time.

[Kurskovich]

 and they'll even follow instructions some of the time.

Urist McDoc "now you keep that that bandage on"
Urist McArrowwound *promptly dumps bandage in room*

[Oliolli]

PETA would burn an effigy of you on a stake...

I think they're already doing that every now and then...

[sneakey pete]

With all the stuff people have done to kittens in DF, PETA isn't exactly about to become more pissed off by some animal dissecting.

[Number4]

PETA are modern-day elves. Fuck them.

[GreatWyrmGold]

I wonder...did that doc that removed the dwarf's lungs get the dwarf as a kill?

[Oliolli]

Urist McUnfriendlyDoctor the Butcher of Patients: 17 notable kills

[jamesadelong]

(After a patient comes in suffering from broken limbs and mangled organs. Having fought of the greatest and most powerful FB the surgeon deems in necessary to revive him)
Urist McUnfriendlyDoctor: "Gentlemen, we can rebuild him. We have the technology."
Urist McNurse "True, but it's not the technology we're worried about doctor."
(Urist McUnfriendly Doctor turns on Urist McNurse slowly menacing with a cleaver)
Urist McUnfriendlyDoctor: "Oh dear, nurse, you seem to have a brain hemorrhage. Shame that but don't worry, I shall fix it and you permanently")
Urist McNurse: "What?! No! No I don't! Get away from me! Get awa....AHHHHH!"

Urist McNurse has been struck down!

[Greader]

I just had an idea how the problem of the diagnostic-skill becoming rusty could be solved. The idea is pretty much that every dwarf goes to see the diagnostician once per few months for a quick check-up. It would be really short (In-game it would be pretty much just a dwarf running into the hospital, standing next to the dovtor for a few seconds and then leaving) and it wouldn't give the doctor much skill. If the rate at which dwarves get checked is right it should prevent any skill loss and even slowly train the doctor over time.

Though I suppose that mechanic wouldn't really help much now, other than to keep the skill up.

[Leonance]

I just had an idea how the problem of the diagnostic-skill becoming rusty could be solved. The idea is pretty much that every dwarf goes to see the diagnostician once per few months for a quick check-up. It would be really short (In-game it would be pretty much just a dwarf running into the hospital, standing next to the dovtor for a few seconds and then leaving) and it wouldn't give the doctor much skill. If the rate at which dwarves get checked is right it should prevent any skill loss and even slowly train the doctor over time.

Though I suppose that mechanic wouldn't really help much now, other than to keep the skill up.

I can see it now my whole fort dies now because Urist McMason did not build the wall that would save the fortress from flooding/invaders/Moody dwarves/etc... cause he was getting a physical.

[jamesadelong]

Does this mean that we have advanced beyond the guild system into a union system that advocates mandatory medical care for all workers?

[Greiger]

I can imagine a dabbling diagnosor now during checkups.

Urist: Hi doc, just here for my checkup.  If all is good I'll go back to work.

Urist:Ok Urist, lemme just take a quick look see here...  CANCER!  You have cancer!

Urist: I have what?  How can that be? I feel fine!

Urist: Nurse Urist, please remove this dwarf's heart to prevent his blood cancer from spreading.  Next patient!

[Urist_McArathos]

It seems that in the current system, animals don't receive medical care.  Considering how often they seem to fight, enabling medical care for animals might be a great help to keeping your doctors in shape.

I really like the autopsy idea though: modern med students practice techniques and study anatomy with cadavers long before they first put a live patient under the knife.  I could easily see a Urist McGalen teaching the proper techniques for suturing and removing necrotic flesh using "spare" goblin corpses.

[Dr. Hieronymous Alloy]

A high Memory attribute should help with the problem of diagnosis skill atrophying. Seems like  good embark doctor should have high empathy and memory.

[HorridOwn4ge]

I just had an idea how the problem of the diagnostic-skill becoming rusty could be solved. The idea is pretty much that every dwarf goes to see the diagnostician once per few months for a quick check-up. It would be really short (In-game it would be pretty much just a dwarf running into the hospital, standing next to the dovtor for a few seconds and then leaving) and it wouldn't give the doctor much skill. If the rate at which dwarves get checked is right it should prevent any skill loss and even slowly train the doctor over time.

Though I suppose that mechanic wouldn't really help much now, other than to keep the skill up.

Reminds me of penis inspection day at school.