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Author Topic: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.  (Read 472774 times)

Badger Storm

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #3225 on: November 25, 2014, 12:22:40 pm »
Revenge for that time when you catapulted his pet rabbit off the drawbridge.  Mr. Fuzzbuns's death will not go unavenged!

Why can't you get meat from rabbits?
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Urist McRas

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #3226 on: November 25, 2014, 04:24:20 pm »
Quote from: Badger Storm on November 25, 2014, 12:22:40 pm
Why can't you get meat from rabbits?

Because you'll need a knife to detach it and it's a common knowledge butchers never use one. Actually, when you think of it, they must be strangling the animals.

Can dwarfs read?
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Quote from: Doughnut189 on November 25, 2013, 02:17:01 am
The fortresses are penal colonies.
The mountainhome has far too many degenerates too deal with by itself, so it sends out minor nobles to establish penal colonies across the world.

Arcvasti

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #3227 on: November 25, 2014, 04:44:47 pm »
Obviously they can, since everything is in ASCII. An illiterate dwarf has no idea what anything that isn't a dwarf or a wall IS.

Why don't dwarves take baths in alchohol?
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Quartz_Mace

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #3228 on: November 25, 2014, 07:16:57 pm »
Waste of drinking alcohol. Same reason they don't use it for medicine or anything other than drinking.

Dwarves only bathe in magma

Why do Dwarves forget the beasts (Forgotten Beasts)?

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UnicodingUnicorn

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #3229 on: November 25, 2014, 07:52:07 pm »
Ever noticed how you don't get FBs made of booze?

Wh hasn't the world burned down yet because of Titans made of fire?

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Tiruin

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #3230 on: November 25, 2014, 09:43:05 pm »
Fire is the shaped form of the spark of life. Like the terrestrial fire that moulds metal in dwarven hands, the fires of the age-immemorial Titans take on the literal semblance of their being, acting as an encasement of their life--hereby termed their lifeforce. Much as other Titans created out of natural characteristics, like the Snow Titan which never melts, or the Rock Titan where iron doesn't bend, Fire in the form of a Titan represents also its power. It can control that which creates it, to not harm its surroundings, no matter how hostile its surroundings are to itself.

Why aren't Peregrine Falcons (by default) tameable? They make GREAT vermin hunters (unlike bloody cats :I)
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UnicodingUnicorn

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #3231 on: November 25, 2014, 09:50:49 pm »
The moment a dwarf gets any resemblance of training into a peregrine falcon, he sends it to hunt some vermin in celebration. The falcon then attempts to dive bomb the vermin and whacks its head on the low cave roof in the process, giving it brain damage and removing all remembrance of any training received.

Why don't adventurers need to excrete waste matter?
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Edward Evjen

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #3232 on: November 25, 2014, 10:23:23 pm »
They don't live long enough.

Why are dwarfs dependent on alcohol?
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UnicodingUnicorn

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #3233 on: November 25, 2014, 11:18:50 pm »
Because it is essential to their metabolism. They are chemoautotrophs.

Has anyone started a dwarf farm yet?
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Eric Blank

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #3234 on: November 26, 2014, 01:56:56 am »
Yes. It resulted in so many babies the user couldn't post again because his computer crashed and he went insane.

Why do cats love to drop vermin in doorways?
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Quote from: Andreus on June 09, 2011, 02:07:07 pm
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

UnicodingUnicorn

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #3235 on: November 26, 2014, 02:11:32 am »
How else would they get you to notice their hard work?

Why can't dwarves emigrate?
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Foxite

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #3236 on: November 26, 2014, 10:54:52 am »
They do, every season. From the mountainhomes.

Why haven't I gotten a baron yet when I already meet the requirements for a monarch?
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Quote from: Melting Sky on December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 pm
The best way to demonstrate it to him is take a save of 40 year old fortress with 150 dwarves in it on a good sized embark with a volcano that just breached the circus and install it on his gaming rig and watch it bring his rig to its knees.

MDFification

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #3237 on: November 26, 2014, 11:01:32 am »
Quote from: latias1290 on November 26, 2014, 10:54:52 am
They do, every season. From the mountainhomes.

Why haven't I gotten a baron yet when I already meet the requirements for a monarch?

The nobility is displeased with the way your last 5 mayors mysteriously disappeared after they demanded crystal glass puzzleboxes.

Why do cave dragons have wings but surface-dragons don't?
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Eric Blank

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #3238 on: November 26, 2014, 11:50:59 am »
They're actually completely different species. Dorfs are just bad at identifying them.

Why do forgotten beasts always murder everything they see?
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Quote from: Andreus on June 09, 2011, 02:07:07 pm
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

Foxite

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #3239 on: November 26, 2014, 03:17:55 pm »
They're forgotten. They don't like that. They want to get revenge, but on everyone because they forgot who forgot them.

Where do all those bogeymen suddenly come from at night?
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Quote from: Melting Sky on December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 pm
The best way to demonstrate it to him is take a save of 40 year old fortress with 150 dwarves in it on a good sized embark with a volcano that just breached the circus and install it on his gaming rig and watch it bring his rig to its knees.
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