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[Dwarf4Explosives]

@Nidilap: At the time that is implemented, we will indeed find humans in Towns and goblins in Dark Forts, but we shall find Elves in Pains and dwarves in magma, or possibly magnetized to the sky.

[klefenz]

Could someone explain why my cats insist on going to the undergound refuse stockpile, which contains a couple zombie hairs? I know cats like to explore, but they have arleady been in that room. I have to keep the door thigthly closed so these cats dont release the zombies again.

[fortydayweekend]

Could someone explain why my cats insist on going to the undergound refuse stockpile, which contains a couple zombie hairs? I know cats like to explore, but they have arleady been in that room. I have to keep the door thigthly closed so these cats dont release the zombies again.

Cats can't resist playing with balls of thread... especially if they're alive enough to move around

[Knit tie]

Why is my cook so fixated upon using tallow for every meal? Those are strawberries with honey, no neeed to dump lard on them!

[Larix]

They're not just adding lard, they're frying the other ingredients in it. Everything's better deep-fried - chicken, potatoes, strawberries, ice cream, butter! (Which explains why dwarfs are so prone to catch fire - they're coated in grease.)

How come dwarfs live in an unventilated hole in the ground together with a bunch of other bearded midgets, only changing their clothes every two years and only taking a bath as preparation for medical treatment (so the doctors can see the actual dwarf underneath the dirt) and bear the olfactory bombardment without complaint, yet get all angry when a bit of pig brain gets over-ripe?

[Erils]

Because they knew that all their pain, all their suffering, would be worth it. Because at the end, they would get to feast on a juicy, delicious pig brain. Once that incentive is gone, then all their suffering was in vain.

Why do my military dwarves insist on trying to wrestle the thralled cat to death instead of just beheading it with their axes. They have already cut off the cat's legs, tail, nose, ears and eyes, but are just wrestling it now. One of them even died of thirst trying to do so.

[Knit tie]

They just wanna pet the kitty!

Where do brewers get the water needed for their drinks? All they ever ask for is fermented foodstuffs.

[Erils]

Food and plants already have water in them. Fermenting them helps bring that water out, while mixing it with the food at the same time.

Why do so many dwarves come to a dangerous mountain that has already lost dozens of dwarves to a siege that is still outside?

[Dwarf4Explosives]

Because dwarves do not understand the concept of "natural causes" enough to distinguish them from, say, magma.

Why are dwarves capable of building supports that can hold up an entire mountain, but incapable of making walls that can survive falling without deconstructing?

[Nidilap]

Dwarves are about structure, not impact. That's why they are stout, but not... Constituted.

Why can't dwarves eat rock? That'd be great for Food stockpiles and the loose stone everywhere.

[Erils]

Rocks don't hold enough alchohol to constitute consumption. Nor can they be marinated in it.

Why can plump helmets grow during any season?

[WanderingKid]

Why can plump helmets grow during any season?

Because temperature and moisture are consistent underground after a certain depth.

The real question is why does anything else we grow care what the surface looks like?

[fortydayweekend]

Because temperature and moisture are also inconsistent underground. It's complicated.

Why do above ground crops grow equally well in summer as they do when covered in snow?

[Erils]

Because temperature and moisture are both consistent and inconsistent aboveground. This complicated cycle is one of the many reasons that dwarves prefer living underground.

Why else do dwarves prefer living underground?

[Doktoro Reichard]

Because it's the dwarfiest thing to do.

Also, because it's way simpler lazier to just dig a huge clump of rock than to drag it above and then arrange it in such a way rooms and walls become defined.

Why is it that, once I replace most of my dwarves clothes with armor, things seem to go faster. And why is it that, whenever I remove all sorts of sustenance, food, booze and clothes, dwarves seem to go faster than the speed of sound?