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Author Topic: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.  (Read 474531 times)

☼!!Troll Fur Sock!!☼

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Dwarves think?
However, their beards and cats (secondary brains... In case of cats, ASSUMING DIRECT CONTROLL) probably appreciate them. If it improves the surviving % of dwarves, new victims, yay!




Why necromancers either don't come, or come with 200 zombies, while other players get 30-70 waves most of the time? ;_;
And why do my dwarves cancel building the traps saying that job item was misplaced? I'm not sure how can you misplace a damn boulder. And a mechanism, when there are thousands of them at the stockpiles.
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Quote from: Necrisha
while I'm processing immigrants
Therefore, starve your metalsmiths for maximum gains.

Bihlbo

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Why is it so hard to spot an ambush from a distance? The bastards have to be right next to anything to get spotted, it seems.
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Proudnerd

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Because the kobolds imitate dogs until they get close enough to hit you. Only then do your dwarves realize they aren't dogs. Elves just cut off the tops of their ears, tie grass to their chins and crouch walk so they look like dwarves until they get close enough to attack.


Why are feet so easy to hit compared to everything else?
« Last Edit: October 24, 2013, 10:21:23 pm by Proudnerd »
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"Oi Urdim! Monom just died, can ye go fetch his old hand from the pile o' severed limbs?"
"Eh how am I supposed to know which one's his?"
"I dunno, just grab the one that stinks the least and throw it in."

misko27

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Bit of actual science on hit zones. The quote had the link.
Hit zones
Spoiler (click to show/hide)


Why do dwarves feel the need to repeatedly remind me that yes, they are digging next to a warm tile?
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imperium3

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They are dropping subtle hints that they want a beach holiday.

Why doesnt magma have pressure?
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Socks inspire the same sort of emotions in dwarfs that Helen of Troy inspired in the Achaean Greeks. Although it is said that Helen's face launched a thousand ships, socks have surely launched a million ultimately-fatal Store Owned Item tasks.

shadenight123

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Because Magma...chills.
(Hooooooooo)

Why do caravans never understand they should come with more armed guards? Since I never 'cleanse' the ambushes?
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“Well,” he said. “We’re in the Forgotten hunting grounds I take it. Your screams just woke them up early. Congratulations, Lyara.”
“Do something!” she whispered, trying to keep her sight on all of them at once.
Basileus clapped his hands once. The Forgotten took a step forward, attracted by the sound.
“There, I did something. I clapped. I like clapping,” he said. -The Investigator And The Case Of The Missing Brain.

Urist McRas

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Those are not caravans, those are reconnaissance parties disguised as caravans.

Nobody seems to answer this:
Why necromancers either don't come, or come with 200 zombies, while other players get 30-70 waves most of the time? ;_;
And why do my dwarves cancel building the traps saying that job item was misplaced? I'm not sure how can you misplace a damn boulder. And a mechanism, when there are thousands of them at the stockpiles.
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The fortresses are penal colonies.
The mountainhome has far too many degenerates too deal with by itself, so it sends out minor nobles to establish penal colonies across the world.

Larix

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Sorry, we don't serve zombies here.

Re: caravans - blame the dispatchers. Paying the fees to widows/widowers and orphans is cheaper than hiring enough guards.

Magma's density is close to that of solid stone, well over twice of that of water. Real-world living creatures will float or barely sink in water. How come creatures in DF can sink all the way down a lava pipe? How dense do they have to be? (O.k., that sort of answers the question for dwarfs, but kittens in the game still sink, i've tried.)
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Urist McRas

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Dwarven physics. Since magma doesn't have pressure, it doesn't create Archimedes force. Hence things don't float in magma regardless of dense.

Why don't dwarven child go to some sort of school?
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The fortresses are penal colonies.
The mountainhome has far too many degenerates too deal with by itself, so it sends out minor nobles to establish penal colonies across the world.

Akura

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How many dwarves do you see with the Teacher skill?


Why did it take so long for my dwarves to start training the first batch of Semi-Wild emu chicks?
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Quote
They asked me how well I understood theoretical physics. I told them I had a theoretical degree in physics. They said welcome aboard.
... Yes, the hugs are for everyone.  No stabbing, though.  Just hugs.

Cuddles

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Why the hell can I not build fortifications or walls on a constructed floor?
this is stupid.
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☼!!Troll Fur Sock!!☼

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Why did it take so long for my dwarves to start training the first batch of Semi-Wild emu chicks?
Taming wild dwarven chicks was higher priority
I SO had to.

Why the hell can I not build fortifications or walls on a constructed floor?
this is stupid.
Fortifications are little more than stuff placed in such a way so you can duck behind it if you see an projectile incoming. And they are so high that you can't just jump over them, and even FB can use them as cover...
Conclusion: They are high pillars of stone.
A high pillar would just wall over if it wasn't dug in the ground or attached to holes or stuff carved in the cavern floor.
*science*


How the hell would a dwarf survive a beard amputation? (planned for justice system)
On a side note... If the beard works like a secondary brain, that would explain why every single mage in fantasy has one that almost reaches his knees...
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Quote from: Necrisha
while I'm processing immigrants
Therefore, starve your metalsmiths for maximum gains.

Cuddles

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So something kinda bizarre just happened.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I think my entire fortress just started raiding the caravan which just arrived of hospital supplies.

It looks like they're all carrying thread, cloth, or what-have-you.
I don't know what the hell happened here.
Oh, it looks like they lifted approximately 1,800,000 units of cloth.
So that seems to be... about 180 pieces of cloth. All fitting into one chest by the way, which I find retarded and hilarious.
What the fuck is going on here.
« Last Edit: October 26, 2013, 04:01:04 pm by Cuddles »
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Eric Blank

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You put a chest in the hospital, that's what's going on. There's some bug which causes dwarves to assign all of the cloth/thread they can get their hands on to the hospital, which leaves none for your clothing industry. They'll also steal all your adamantine threads before they can be forged into wafers.
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I make Spellcrafts!
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

Cuddles

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You put a chest in the hospital, that's what's going on. There's some bug which causes dwarves to assign all of the cloth/thread they can get their hands on to the hospital, which leaves none for your clothing industry. They'll also steal all your adamantine threads before they can be forged into wafers.

Yes but the issue is that they're stealing from a caravan.
Like they ran out to the caravans while they were coming in and just systematically stole every bit of cloth on them.
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I don't bite.
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