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Author Topic: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.  (Read 474737 times)

flame99

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  • Lady Stardust & her songs of darkness and disgrace
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This is a trick question, as both need booze to exist, therefore booze came first.

Why are there no longer any dwarvern philosophers?
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It/its, they/them, in order of preference.

Not gay as in happy, queer as in fuck you.

WanderingKid

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When everyone drinks that much,  everyone is a philosopher.  It's now synonymous with "bored hauler".

Why does physics affect different fiorts differently?

enolate

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Octopus beaks are made of chitin, by the by.
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Ora_the_Owlish

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Armok is the God of Blood, not the God of Consistency. (or: Dwarven physics makes perfect sense. To Toady.)

How did a hydra corpse fit through the 1-wide corridor to the butcher's shop?
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Broseph Stalin, "The Increasingly Tragic Tale of Dumplin", a narrative
This is a narrative. All craftdwarfship is of the highest quality. It menaces with spikes of feels.

Larix

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Tail first, of course.

How do you fit four hydras in a fine pewter minec<shot with ballista>

Why do pathetically weak, unarmed unarmoured troglodytes insist on attacking my miners? Don't they learn from the fate of their companions, who invariably end up spread all over the cavern?
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flame99

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They did. The thing is, it actually encourages them. You see, some creatures, like wolves and troglodytes, have what's known as "Lemming Pack Mentality", in which they will throw themselves at big game and get killed, under the assumption that should enough of them jump their target, then one will land a kill, or at least cripple them.

Why does a god of blood rule over creation? It seems like a god of creation should rule over creation.
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It/its, they/them, in order of preference.

Not gay as in happy, queer as in fuck you.

mimmfantry

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Because the blood god killed the god of creation for his blood and ichor

What goes through your mind when you read this

Onshen Idashatul Ogred Id

A towering blob composed of !!FUN!! flame. It has two long, hanging tails and it moves about carelessly.

I've heard that blob types either die instantly or are really really hard to kill.

After a long break from the game I decided to start a new game. This meets me less than a year in and has started to set my entire pasture zone on fire. I have just completed armor for the two dwarves I was going to assign to military training what might be the best way to handle this?
« Last Edit: August 10, 2013, 11:41:19 am by mimmfantry »
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!!Fyre!!

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Onshen Idashatul Ogred Id

A towering blob composed of !!FUN!! flame. It has two long, hanging tails and it moves about carelessly.

I've heard that blob types either die instantly or are really really hard to kill.

...what might be the best way to handle this?

First thought?

Flood the outside of your fort. Hopefully the fire monster will act like a lit lignite bin causeing the water touching it to turn to steam, making the water constantly flow towards it and boiling it to death. Of course I have no idea if blobs can die from stream, so it may not work, but it'll FUN!
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flame99

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If memory serves, fire FBs are really easy to kill if you can damage them. Get a marksdwarf firing at it from a distance. It should die with a few bolts. Side effects include Raiders of the Lost Ark style face melting may occur. Consult your doctor before using Sacrafice'emal.
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It/its, they/them, in order of preference.

Not gay as in happy, queer as in fuck you.

Ora_the_Owlish

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Why don't elves die of old age?
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Broseph Stalin, "The Increasingly Tragic Tale of Dumplin", a narrative
This is a narrative. All craftdwarfship is of the highest quality. It menaces with spikes of feels.

Imp

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Because elf jokes never get old, and elves just keep hearing them constantly.

Why do sterile mountainsides sometimes support an original growth of grass that never regrows, yet never have a first few bushes and trees?
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For every trouble under the sun, there is an answer, or there is none.
If there is one, then seek until you find it.
If there is none, then never ever mind it.

mimmfantry

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If memory serves, fire FBs are really easy to kill if you can damage them. Get a marksdwarf firing at it from a distance. It should die with a few bolts. Side effects include Raiders of the Lost Ark style face melting may occur. Consult your doctor before using Sacrafice'emal.

Close, Its a Titan
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kero42

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Because elf jokes never get old, and elves just keep hearing them constantly.

Why do sterile mountainsides sometimes support an original growth of grass that never regrows, yet never have a first few bushes and trees?

Failed attempt at elven mountain colonization. They grew some grass, then they gave up.

Why do Vampires never drink blood from barrels?
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Something I find interesting and thought I should share: DF from scratch: http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=127552.0

Solon64

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Like most predators, they prefer their blood hot amd fresh. Legendary weaponsmith blood fresh from the sleeping smith is considered a high delicacy in vampire culture.

If a tree falls in the forest, and it lands on a dwarf child, crushing it and killing it instantly... does anyone care? The falling tree may or may not have been an.accident. (and it may or may not actually be possible when the next df version is realeased. Cant... contain... excitement...)
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PS: Seriously, you must have, like, super-getting-lost skills. You could go missing in a straight corridor and impale yourself on flat ground if I don't tell you where to go.

McDonald

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no because they have a legendary dining room.

what happenes when you add a dwarf, a pick, and an aquifer in a freezing biome?
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I'm with stupid |
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