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Author Topic: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.  (Read 466713 times)

Scow2

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Why is it so hard to come up with new interesting WTFs?

DF is a land of mystery and wonder and death and {Gasp}  Why is there no disease in the medical sense?  No smallpox or plagues?
Because after 101 pages of back-and-forth discussion, we've already answered most of the WTFs.

And there's no mundane disease because the more deadly ones have completely supplanted them.

Why can't dwarves take personal initiative outside of Moods?
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Minnakht

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Quote
DF is a land of mystery and wonder and death and {Gasp}  Why is there no disease in the medical sense?  No smallpox or plagues?

http://dwarffortresswiki.org/index.php/DF2012:Tower-cap

Quote
There is much controversy about the energy source that tower-caps use to grow. Although it is clear that, like any fungus, they gain energy by breaking down organic compounds in soil and mud, it's equally clear that they are able to do this underground, without access to sunlight. Without any obvious way to regenerate the organic matter that they sprout in, it's unclear how they can survive for thousands of years without sunlight. Thus, useless immigrant dwarven botanists have wasted entirely too much spare time trying to find their energy source.
The leading theory is that underground soil may contain perpetual motion machines, composed of molecular-scale screw pumps and water wheels. As every dwarven engineer knows, a perpetual motion machine must be given water to start up, after which, it will run indefinitely without any extra water required. Molecular-scale screw pumps and water wheels would, similarly, not provide energy until they become muddied, and, similarly, would remain functional indefinitely. The concept of things smaller than monarch butterflies, however, has led to enormous controversy. Although, obviously, it would be hard to see something smaller than a butterfly, it should be possible to show that it exists because, just like butterflies, it would sometimes get stuck in doors and prevent them from closing. So far, there is no evidence that doors have been held stuck by imperceptibly tiny objects, so the theory remains unsubstantiated.

There is a substantial lack of disease transfer vectors in Dwarf Fortress, since microorganisms do not seem to exist.

Quote
Why can't dwarves take personal initiative outside of Moods?

Dwarves believe in perfection. There is a platonic ideal of every item, and masterworks are simply coming really close to said ideal.
Sometimes, a dwarf will decide he'll break the mold and make something different, possibly even using normally unacceptable materials for his craft. Those items are highly valued because of their uniqueness, and strangely effective. Aside from them, dwarves try to make their items all the same, decorations notwithstanding.

Also, personal initiative is what dwarves take when they get married. Or throw parties. Or eat. Or not pull the lever/go trade at the depot for whatever reason.

---

Why don't dwarves eat land-dwelling small animals unless really desperate, while they do eat water-dwelling ones without much of a problem?
« Last Edit: October 02, 2012, 04:47:53 pm by Minnakht »
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Giant badgers are cruel saddistic balls of fur and hate. Did anyone know they could paint a wall with a single dwarven baby?.... You know what, I made the Giant badgers sound like sane DF players.
A Kea has stolen a coke!

Tsuchigumo550

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They figure the water makes them clean all the time.

Why do dwarves insist on leaving stones in a room after marking it as a room? It's cluttery.
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There are words that make the booze plant possible. Just not those words.
Alright you two. Attempt to murder each other. Last one standing gets to participate in the next test.
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hops

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They don't have time to haul because they're busy petting cats.

How do brooks in DF work, seriously? They're 7/7 water surface that you can walk on without getting wet or even have to swim. Are they like enchanted or something?
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she/her. (Pronouns vary over time.) The artist formerly known as Objective/Cinder.

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Rose

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They are a pile loose rocks. the water flows between them, but a dwarf just walks on top.

Why can't I think of a question?
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hops

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Because after 101 pages of back-and-forth discussion, we've already answered most of the WTFs.

How, exactly, could a giant dragon fit between to trees?
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she/her. (Pronouns vary over time.) The artist formerly known as Objective/Cinder.

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darkgloomie

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Because after 101 pages of back-and-forth discussion, we've already answered most of the WTFs.

How, exactly, could a giant dragon fit between to trees?
snugly!
yeah, this kind of questions kinda calls for this type of answer, at least from me :p

Manager issues work order! Urist McWorkdwarf instantly knows what to do, and where, and when to stop. How's that possible? (please don't answer with "dwarven hive mind")
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hops

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Invisible loudspeakers.

Why don't the clowns just trade with us?
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she/her. (Pronouns vary over time.) The artist formerly known as Objective/Cinder.

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crazysheep

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They can't trade if they can't get through adamantine pillars. Also, what would they trade with us? They don't do anything useful down there in their homes..

Why are webbing titans so annoying?
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"Don't be in such a hurry to grow up, for there's nothing a kid can't do."

misko27

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They can't trade if they can't get through adamantine pillars. Also, what would they trade with us? They don't do anything useful down there in their homes..

Why are webbing titans so annoying?
Becaue watching your dwarves be eaten while helpless by a bizzare nature monster is annoying.

Why do military dwarves let themselves be beaten and even killed if not activated?
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The Age of Man is over. It is the Fire's turn now

Xob Ludosmbax

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Why do military dwarves let themselves be beaten and even killed if not activated?

Union rules.  If they fight back when they're not on the clock, they'll make the other dwarves in the union look bad. 

Why is it that vampires who can't walk manage to run from the hospital to a sleeping victim, but immediately after feeding, they collapse next to the bed, once again unable to walk?

hops

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Typical symptom of vampirnaline causing rapid rebuilding of vital tissues that decay as fast.

Why are capybaras so lethal?
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she/her. (Pronouns vary over time.) The artist formerly known as Objective/Cinder.

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Monk321654

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It's a giant bloody cavy with giant bloody teeth. Why do YOU think?

Why are DF cows so big compared to RL cows?
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This is a side-effect of dwarven animal training (hit animal with hammer until it forgets that it hates you, then lovingly cuddle it).

I'm not your average Bay12er. I care about my drunken midgets.

pisskop

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RL modern cows are domesticated and selected to be weak docile milk drinkers passive.  They were much bigger, more agressive, and less fruitful historically.  And made less milk.  Makes sense.  Even bulls are watered down...

Why can't balista shoot through wall grates?
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Pisskop's Reblancing Mod - A C:DDA Mod to make life a little (lot) more brutal!
drealmerz7 - pk was supreme pick for traitor too I think, and because of how it all is and pk is he is just feeding into the trollfucking so well.
PKs DF Mod!

GoombaGeek

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A ballista arrowhead is bigger than your head. Why would it go through a (presumably very sturdy) grate? It would be neat if ballista bolts acted like [BUILDINGDESTROYER:2], though.

How can adventurers tell what creature a particular pool of blood came from at a glance? It's like:
*glances at battlefield strewn with the corpses of most of the sentient creatures in the country*
"Oh look, gremlin blood! My favorite. *drinks*"

I can understand why troll blood is easy to identify (it's blue and tastes coppery), but everything else?!
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My wooden badge was delicious.
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