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Author Topic: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.  (Read 466719 times)

Blizzlord

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Because dwarves don't trust any booze that isn't in a barrel when they first see it.

How come we are so baffled about the dwarven world that 101 pages and 1500 posts form out of discussing it?
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Komra

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A world that allows such things as tiny people (that run on massive amounts of toxins, make tools from the bones of demons, and live as a facial-hair-based hive) creates a LOT of baffling events.

Why are demons little more than super-FBs?
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But you never see a movie where a terrible coal plant accident causes a horrible devastation, do you? Nope, everyone seems to think that nuclear plants get their energy by smacking live atomic warheads all day or something.

Monk321654

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Demon, Forgotten Beast, and Titan are really just racist slang made up by those three parties. They're the same in all but where they live. Titan sounds cool, Demon sounds horrific.

If a tree falls in the woods, how many elves does it squish?
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This is a side-effect of dwarven animal training (hit animal with hammer until it forgets that it hates you, then lovingly cuddle it).

I'm not your average Bay12er. I care about my drunken midgets.

tahujdt

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If a tree falls in the woods, how many elves does it squish?
None, elf sites are still being reprogrammed.

How can dropping 1000 Seeds on a dwarf train his armor using skills and exercise him at the same time?
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pisskop

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You try jumping in full armour.

How was droping seeds on dorf never thought of before?
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Pisskop's Reblancing Mod - A C:DDA Mod to make life a little (lot) more brutal!
drealmerz7 - pk was supreme pick for traitor too I think, and because of how it all is and pk is he is just feeding into the trollfucking so well.
PKs DF Mod!

DiezIrae

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You try jumping in full armour.

How was droping seeds on dorf never thought of before?

We had enough sexual innuendos to work with.

Where does a dwarven soul go after the body has been struck down?
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Scow2

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You try jumping in full armour.

How was droping seeds on dorf never thought of before?

We had enough sexual innuendos to work with.

Where does a dwarven soul go after the body has been struck down?
To the dining hall to throw a party.

Why is my mayor a naked tigerman?
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gbrngfol

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Same reason why this giants teeth are tangled:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

How do teeth get tangled in the first place?
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Megaman3321

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By eating too many rocks.

How does GCS shot web without spinner?
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Glacial on dwarves being assigned socks:
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You see, here's how I think this works:
Overseer: Welcome to the military! You need to wear socks! Dorf: Oh, I should get military socks. My socks are civilian socks. Dorf discards socks Dorf: You know, I need a whole lot of gear now. I should get socks... last. Oh, but these steel boots with the white goo on them are nice!
I know you can pick up water, then throw said water, while underwater, to kill a fish -He_Silent_H

darkgloomie

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Mechanical implants.

How can a manager hidden in his room issue orders and have them carried out even hundreds of z-levels of difference?
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Monk321654

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Standardized Overseer-Invisible communications line. Made from rocks.
They use Morse code to communicate.

How can imps stay on fire so long?
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This is a side-effect of dwarven animal training (hit animal with hammer until it forgets that it hates you, then lovingly cuddle it).

I'm not your average Bay12er. I care about my drunken midgets.

misko27

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When they eat, they transfer the materials into small amounts of lignite, which they store on their bodies surface.

How do dwarves and invaders automatically know all current methods in and out of the fortress, no matter how far out of the way, and know instantly when they are locked?
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pisskop

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Dorfs are not quiet.  Theyre always mining and smelting and drinking and fighting and eating and partying and socializing and catsplosions and floods and dangerrooms and obsidians and...

Loud frakkin' dwarves.

What did dwarves do before alcohol was invented?
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Pisskop's Reblancing Mod - A C:DDA Mod to make life a little (lot) more brutal!
drealmerz7 - pk was supreme pick for traitor too I think, and because of how it all is and pk is he is just feeding into the trollfucking so well.
PKs DF Mod!

TopHat

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Invent alcohol.

----------~QUESTION SLOT OPEN~----------
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I would ask why fire can burn two men to death without getting hot enough to burn a book, but then I read "INEXTINGUISHABLE RUNNING KAMIKAZE RADIOACTIVE FLAMING ZOMBIE" and realized that logic, reason, and physics are all occupied with crying in the corner right now.

pisskop

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Why is it so hard to come up with new interesting WTFs?

DF is a land of mystery and wonder and death and {Gasp}  Why is there no disease in the medical sense?  No smallpox or plagues?
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Pisskop's Reblancing Mod - A C:DDA Mod to make life a little (lot) more brutal!
drealmerz7 - pk was supreme pick for traitor too I think, and because of how it all is and pk is he is just feeding into the trollfucking so well.
PKs DF Mod!
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