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Author Topic: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.  (Read 466693 times)

Graebeard

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It exists, just not in the firm we recognize.  Much like non-euclidian geometry it is self-consistent but unrecognizable to those of us who function in a different system.

Why does fighting the dead provide such drastically bad thoughts? With necromancer towers just over each hill you'd think zombie killing would be passe.
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GreatWyrmGold

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How comes dwarven logic is not really existant?
That's just speciesist lies. Dwarven logic is existant; it's just underdeveloped. Think of dwarves like toddlers.

Why does fighting the dead provide such drastically bad thoughts? With necromancer towers just over each hill you'd think zombie killing would be passe.
It's not just the fighting, it's the pervasive evil of the undead. It unnerves the steeliest of minds, crumbles the steeliest of spines, and disgusts the steeliest of noses. The last might just be because the undead are sorta...rotten.


EDIT: Oops, forgot a question.
Why do dwarves work and do what we tell them to, when most of us just insult them and toss out their lives like they were nothing more than bad, cheap candy?
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Flying Fortress

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Because they know we value them highly.  Even bad, cheap candy is pretty valuable.  ;)

Why do a bunch of demons cram themselves into a tiny tube hoping that maybe one day it will be opened instead of waiting in a more spacious area?
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Rose

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They have no sense of personal space, and, in fact, value the companionship.

Why are the gateways to hell being protected by sugar?
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leafbarrett

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Because Armok has a sick sense of humor.

Why is it that dwarves can't make weapons out of whatever metal they please?
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Quote from: leafbarrett
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They can do whatever the heck they want. That's why they are nobles, cause they CAN.
King Henry the IV or something had a lot of wives, most of whom he executed. Because he could.
A ton of them mass-murdered Jews and Muslims. CAUSE THEY COULD.
A roman emperor made his horse a noble, cause he could.
And I modded them all out of existence, because I could.
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Vodrilus

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Damn ninja. I'll post anyway...
Why are the gateways to hell being protected by sugar?
Dentistry being an art of infernal origins, the demons know better than to risk their teeth on the venture.
Why is it that dwarves can't make weapons out of whatever metal they please?
Their fine-tuned beards would oppose the very idea. They're very conservative, you know?

How come dwarves know all the Forgotten Beasts by name, if they're all supposed to be forgotten?
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Going backwards in reversed time (just like everybody else).

Monk321654

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Forgotten by most surface people, they are well known by cave dwellers like Dwarves themselves.
Alternatively, they give them names on the spot.

What does Candy Taste like?
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This is a side-effect of dwarven animal training (hit animal with hammer until it forgets that it hates you, then lovingly cuddle it).

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Graebeard

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Ninja!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Like the blood welling at the tip of a dagger pressed ever so slightly too hard against a tremoring throat.  However, the precise taste actually depends upon the surrounding layer stone in which it is found.

Why does minecart?
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adasdad

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because dorf.


how come no species is really awesome? dwarves are stupid, elves are crazy, humans are boring, gobbos are wierd, and animal men haven't done anything with their lives.
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GreatWyrmGold

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No species can be awesome, just like no species can be evil. Only individuals can be awesome or evil.

Why does no one take this thread seriously anymore?
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adasdad

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because really, it's a boring concept.


why are carp so dang feared, even after the
Nerfening?
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Graebeard

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why are carp so dang feared, even after the
Nerfening?

Genetic memory.  Those dorfs who's spores went on to reproduce were those that cast a wary eye at the rivers.  The result is a brainstem-level instinctual reaction in terror at the sight of any non-vermin fish.

Why do windmills freeze stuck in the winter even when there's no water around?
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misko27

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Well...
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
This is why you cant get power aboveground.

Why do dwarves like saying creatue in the way if there the only one there!?!
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crazysheep

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Because they are creatures, just like the rest of the living things in DF.

Why magma?
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misko27

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Why not?

how come flying creatures cant pass fortifications above air, and they can when its in water? Presumbably they are the same size then and now, so why?
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