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[Bobnova]

You weren't dwarfy enough. That shrubbery should have been burnt to bare earth.

Why is it that despite dwarven mothers carrying their babies everywhere, they can't seem to notice that a goblin has grabbed said baby?

[WaffleEggnog]

Because they are to busy thinking of the masterwork roasts and delicious dwarvern wine that they had earlier

Why do uninjured dwarfs seem to think the hospital is better then thier rooms with masterwork furnature?

[misko27]

Clearly the smell of rotting flesh and cries for help soothe them to sleep.

Why are military dwarves willing to fight anything you tell them to, even if it is clearly going to kill them painfully?

[Graebeard]

Because they're dwarfs, dammit, not those pansy elves.

Why do masons deconstruct stairs from below, crushing themselves with the resulting stone blocks?

[Bobnova]

If they deconstructed them from the top, they'd fall and take falling damage.

How does a dead owl corpse falling from the z level above the dwarf shatter a dwarven leg bone?

[WaffleEggnog]

Because owls are so badass, that they even hurt people after they are dead.

Why are Dwarvern children so useless?

[Broseph Stalin]

At the age of one they do demolition work and harvest fields, at the age of twelve they can do any labor and join the army who are you calling useless?

Why do dwarves release vampires from jail?

[WaffleEggnog]

They obviously learned their lesson

On the subject of dwarvern children, why are theey magicaly able to do everything as soon as they are 12?

[Firehawk45]

Their beards are fully grown at this stage.

How is my tantruming Weaponsmith able to beat someone to death with a +Cave Spider Silk Trousers+.... i dont get it....

[Graebeard]

Just be glad they weren't ☼Cave Spider Silk Trousers☼.

Why does walling yourself into a corner seem like such a good idea?

[Corai]

You will never have to see your demonic overseer again.

Why are demons able to be captured by humans when a single one can demolish a entire dwarven fortress?

[MaximumZero]

You will never have to see your demonic overseer again.

Why are demons able to be captured by humans when a single one can demolish a entire dwarven fortress?

The humans aren't too busy chasing down socks en masse to fight off the demon horde.

Why don't dwarves throw random crap in fortress mode? I mean, we've seen people decapitate one another with handfuls of sand.

[misko27]

early

How is my tantruming Weaponsmith able to beat someone to death with a +Cave Spider Silk Trousers+.... i dont get it....

Clearly they dont need to, Pants are too dangerous to handle already, can you imagine a room full of dwarves throwing artifacts and weapons around?

Why dont dwarves just move things out of the way when it blocks the building their trying to construct?

[Blizzlord]

Because the task of building takes up all their available brain power. If they tried to move the object then they would forget what they were doing in the first place.

Why have the dwarves not invented gunpowder?

[Monk321654]

Because the task of building takes up all their available brain power. If they tried to move the object then they would forget what they were doing in the first place.

Why have the dwarves not invented gunpowder?

They tried.
Didn't blow over too well.
But it did blow.

Why don't Voracious Cave Crawlers have bones? (Seriously, I checked the raws, that makes no sense.)