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Author Topic: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.  (Read 474550 times)

Tersr

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #195 on: August 20, 2011, 11:12:24 am »
The enemy of my enemy is my ally.

Why do we always anger elves but complain about elf sieges?
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Quote from: Wannazzaki on January 01, 2012, 03:37:32 pm
Shooting something made of a semi hard metal with no organs is a fucking stupid idea anyway.

Mobotium

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #196 on: August 20, 2011, 12:30:58 pm »
Cause by torturing/magmaing/burning/drowning/slaugthering/emprisioning angering elves we are actualy trying to show them the way not to be idiots/hippies/jerks so silly. Of course, everyone complains when they show up saying WE are the idiots/jerks/murderers/racists silly ones.

Why are there lots of animal zombies, but little to none human/dwarf/elf zombies?
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Quote from: San_A333 on April 11, 2011, 03:08:34 pm
Yes he is... So the countess will never bread?
Quote from: ancistrus on April 11, 2011, 03:14:16 pm
If she doesnt bread, let her cake.

Sscral

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #197 on: August 20, 2011, 02:16:44 pm »
Because humans/elves/dwarves/goblins are afraid of ghosts, so they always bury/engrave/toss into a volcano/cannibalize the bodies AND spirits of their departed relatives.

Why do gremlins like pulling levers?
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Quote from: Steelgeek on September 21, 2011, 10:24:29 am
A three year old just made an artifact doll from the skull of his dead kitten. I can only assume the mind control lasted past death.
Quote from: Sphalerite on September 21, 2011, 10:28:44 am
"Look, mommy!  Now I can play with Mister Fluffles forever!"

Broseph Stalin

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #198 on: August 20, 2011, 02:36:51 pm »
Everyone like pulling levers.

Why do traders ignore caravans?
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geail

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #199 on: August 20, 2011, 03:44:46 pm »
They are more concerned with next year's goods.

What is the most efficient way to make a cave in trap?
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Ipwnurmom221

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #200 on: August 20, 2011, 05:17:00 pm »
Place your entrance in a cave, so when enemies go to your entrance, they go IN the CAVE. CAVE IN!

How do dwarves and their overall stupidity survive natural selection?
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Quote from: Broseph Stalin on August 19, 2011, 10:45:04 pm
"I haven't seen my parents in nearly a year, I can't move a foot in any direction, I spend all my days being attacked by animals, and I've been forced to drink sheep puke- wow that's a nice floor grate!"

(name here)

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #201 on: August 20, 2011, 07:17:04 pm »
Quote from: Ipwnurmom221 on August 20, 2011, 05:17:00 pm
Place your entrance in a cave, so when enemies go to your entrance, they go IN the CAVE. CAVE IN!

How do dwarves and their overall stupidity survive natural selection?

Because the god of blood likes them stupid and has the smart ones sacrificed to him by magma.

Why do dwarves have metalworking but can't set anything on fire without resorting to magma?
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Quote from: Pilsu on October 09, 2008, 11:50:02 am
Only in Dwarf Fortress would you try to catch a mermaid to butcher her and make trophies out of her bones 

Loyal

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #202 on: August 20, 2011, 07:24:42 pm »
A rare bit of Dwarven wisdom is that they're quite conscious of the fact that they usually live underground. Smoke from that much fire would be problematic with no place to safely escape to, and likely would lead to even shorter fortress lifespans than what we're used to.

Why do dwarves always insist on doing everything on their own? There's a Forgotten Beast corpse that weighs over 10,000 Urists and yet there's only the one guy, sloooooooowly dragging it through the tunnels.
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RenoFox

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #203 on: August 20, 2011, 09:26:36 pm »
With two dwarves on the same tile, they'd both have to crawl all the time.

Why dont dwarves normally make gold or platinum warhammers?
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Urist Da Vinci

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #204 on: August 21, 2011, 12:37:54 am »
It goes against their civilization's culture, same as how dwarves can't make whips, turbans, or thongs.

Why does clothing fall off at death, and dwarves always bury naked bodies?
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andyman564

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #205 on: August 21, 2011, 12:51:26 am »
dwarven beards convulse vigorously at the time of death, causing the body to flop around, often shaking off all of their clothing.

and coffins are designed so that their future occupants fit perfectly into them, leaving no room for clothing or other items.

why do dwarves dig their tunnels large enough for a fully grown dragon to enter?

« Last Edit: August 21, 2011, 12:53:51 am by andyman564 »
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Quote from: Ifeno on August 17, 2012, 11:18:36 pm
Yeah.  Thus why I didn't make a trap.  In it's current state the fortress didn't need a trap, the whole damn fortress is a trap.

Buttery_Mess

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #206 on: August 21, 2011, 05:57:02 am »
Because dwarf life is cheap, but harnessing a pair of breeding dragons is priceless.

How does a dwarf turn a volume of solid rock into thin air and one stone large enough chisel but a table from it? What happens to all the gravel and dust?
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Quote from: myrkul on March 03, 2011, 04:24:09 am
Quote from: MarcAFK on March 03, 2011, 04:19:36 am
But .... It's so small!
It's not the size of the pick that counts... it's the size of the man with the pick.
Quote from: Toady One
Naturally, we'd like to make life miserable for everybody, randomly, but that'll take some doing.

Xotano

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #207 on: August 21, 2011, 07:33:07 am »
it was consumed by there beard, thats why they like mining, there beards command them to for protection

why are all the monsters only one space large
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"Engraved on the wall is a masterful depiction of a human by Logrin.  The artwork relates to Xotano Beastblood The Everseeing Dwelling of Clouds the human vampire recruiting some new human shields companions after his encounter with Ral Firewealthy the Warm Flicker the dragon, during which his face was melted off."

300 human/elf/dwarf/goblin/kobold bodies 20 random animal/fish/bird bodies and 3 dragon bodies all in one backpack. fun stuff.

Hungry Elephant

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #208 on: August 21, 2011, 07:40:04 am »
So they can fit in the aformentioned tunnels large enough for a fully grown dragon to enter.

Why creatures keep dodging even if they're at the edge of a pit filled wit lava instead of just blocking with shields?
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peskyninja

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Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« Reply #209 on: August 21, 2011, 07:43:18 am »
because dodging is nice!

how a syndrome can create blister on a dwarf heart?
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Burn the land and boil the sea. You can't take the sky from me

Thou son of a b*tch wilt not ever make subjects of Christian sons; we have no fear of your army, by land and by sea we will battle with thee, f**k thy mother.
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