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Author Topic: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.  (Read 474378 times)

Mister Always

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Why don't dwarves eat dimple cups?
Would you eat a tube of paint?

Why does my game crash?  :(

(BZZT wrong answer)

Why do humans even buy the worthless crap we carve out of bones and rocks?
« Last Edit: August 13, 2011, 06:04:38 pm by Toady One »
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"""The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit." - W. Somerset Maugham" -Forumite" -Mister Always

Hungry Elephant

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Why do humans even buy the worthless crap we carve out of bones and rocks?

It's basically the souvenir concept. Human people buy worthless crap made of stone and wood (and occasionaly bones) whenever they go on holiday. Merchants do not make exceptions.

Why elves get offended if you try to sell them back their wooden stuff?
« Last Edit: August 13, 2011, 06:04:47 pm by Toady One »
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jaxy15

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They secretly hate what they sell you.

Why do goblins snatch babies?
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Dwarf Fortress: Threats of metabolism.

peskyninja

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You can imagine...
 :o
Why the sea freezes during the night?
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Burn the land and boil the sea. You can't take the sky from me

Thou son of a b*tch wilt not ever make subjects of Christian sons; we have no fear of your army, by land and by sea we will battle with thee, f**k thy mother.

warwizard

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It's colder at night.

Why are fluffy wambulers not thrown at bronze collosi in Fortress mode?
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jaxy15

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Dwarves lack the intelligence to harness the power of throwing.

How do dwarves create farm plots out of nothing?
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Dwarf Fortress: Threats of metabolism.

The Master

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They use hairs from their beards to make them.

Why do some forgotten beast "undulate rhythmically"?
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Holy jesus I thought I was ready but nothing could have prepared me for this
Hush, little Asea, don't you cry.
If he notices we'll surely die!
You. Made. Asea. CRY.

geail

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The pattering of dwarf feet is akin to techno polka.

How does a tiny scratch cause a lethal infection?
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Sscral

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Wouldn't you get an infection if you were covered in two-foot thick layers of pus and vomit?

Why do dwarves never question exactly what it is you're feeding them?  :-X
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A three year old just made an artifact doll from the skull of his dead kitten. I can only assume the mind control lasted past death.
"Look, mommy!  Now I can play with Mister Fluffles forever!"

jaxy15

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They gobble down everything edible. Taste is for sissies. Their preference for food is caused by it's looks and stuff.

How do female dwarves engrave if you haven't added ladybeards?
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Dwarf Fortress: Threats of metabolism.

Kentti

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They gobble down everything edible. Taste is for sissies. Their preference for food is caused by it's looks and stuff.

How do female dwarves engrave if you haven't added ladybeards?

Ladybeards aren't descriped for modesty's sake.   :o

Why do spoilerite clothes wear out?
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Sscral

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Dwarf sweat produces an extremely toxic acid due to the ungodly amounts of alcohol they consume.

Why do cages block reproduction spores?
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A three year old just made an artifact doll from the skull of his dead kitten. I can only assume the mind control lasted past death.
"Look, mommy!  Now I can play with Mister Fluffles forever!"

Tersr

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Cages make force fields, and are infinitely large so no spore get out.

Why are cages infinitely large?
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Shooting something made of a semi hard metal with no organs is a fucking stupid idea anyway.

Sordid

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Why are cages infinitely large?

Because they are, essentially, quantum stockpiles.
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The Master

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you didn't ask a question afterwords...SO I SHALL!  :D

Why do carp have an acute appetite for dwarven flesh?
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Holy jesus I thought I was ready but nothing could have prepared me for this
Hush, little Asea, don't you cry.
If he notices we'll surely die!
You. Made. Asea. CRY.
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