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Author Topic: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.  (Read 474304 times)

DeKaFu

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Because you don't need a heat source to mince things.

Why can you train giant hunting bats but not giant war bats?
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Urist Da Vinci

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Because that's a goblin-exclusive thing to do, bringing giant bats and giant cave swallows to war.

Why do toy hammers weigh more than war hammers, if both are made of the same metal?

gamewizardinnc

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Because toy hammers are decorated and regular hammers are not. (At least that is how it is in my mind.)

Why don't goblins attack my fortress? Im at 120 dwarves and the fortress is valued at over 100 million. Is it the magma flood outside?
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I probably won't be the 13th player with the Curse of Failcannon likely hanging in the air like a particularly pungent dog fart

jaxy15

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They're probably allergic to dwarves.

Why don't dwarves eat fungiwood?
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Dwarf Fortress: Threats of metabolism.

FrisianDude

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Because it tastes like the asshole of a kobold.

Why are five of six Dwarfs who fall one z-level unharmed, stunned at most, but the last one heavily wounded?
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A tiny, foul-tempered humanoid creature that dwells in the evil mountains. They are known to enjoy drinking liquor and will take any unguarded supplies of booze.

(name here)

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He landed funny.

Why is it that dwarven helms do not protect the face?
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Only in Dwarf Fortress would you try to catch a mermaid to butcher her and make trophies out of her bones 

RAKninja

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He landed funny.

Why is it that dwarven helms do not protect the face?
they must have openface helms, to permit the beards to swing freely.

why do dwarves love running around in the buff?
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Goblin Fortress (NOW UPDATED FOR 34.02!
magma on his bed when he is sleeping, works every time

Tersr

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Who doesn't?

Why are rubys found in bauxite?
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Shooting something made of a semi hard metal with no organs is a fucking stupid idea anyway.

MaximumZero

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Because rubies are actually mostly aluminum oxide.

Why don't the plump helmet men start their own society?
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Holy crap, why did I not start watching One Punch Man earlier? This is the best thing.
probably figured an autobiography wouldn't be interesting

Excedion

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Because to get the seeds to reproduce they must smash their own heads open.


Why are roc's so easy to kill despite being so massive?

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If adamantine is perfectly rigid, as shown by having 0 strain at fracture in the raw files, then the speed of sound in the metal approaches the speed of light. Adamantine musical instruments would produce ultrasonic vibrations, and cut off the fingers of the musician.

Tersr

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Huge hearts?

Why can't FB use webs if they have them?
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Shooting something made of a semi hard metal with no organs is a fucking stupid idea anyway.

Urist Da Vinci

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Huge hearts?

Why can't FB use webs if they have them?

They don't have a silk type defined in their raws.

Why do dwarves take a break from a party to have a drink?

Nyxalinth

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Huge hearts?

Why can't FB use webs if they have them?

They don't have a silk type defined in their raws.

Why do dwarves take a break from a party to have a drink?

Because they need to take a break from drinking at the party to drink.

Referring to a previous answer, how would dwarves know what a kobold's ass tastes like?
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Nyxalinth likes the color blue, gaming, writing, art, cats for their aloofness,  Transformers for their sentience and ability to transform, and the Constructicons for their hard work and building skills. Whenever possible, she prefers to consume bacon cheeseburgers and pinot noir. She absolutely detests stupid people.

jaxy15

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Dwarven torture.

Why don't dwarves eat dimple cups?
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Dwarf Fortress: Threats of metabolism.

FrisianDude

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Why don't dwarves eat dimple cups?
Would you eat a tube of paint?




Why does my game crash?  :(
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A tiny, foul-tempered humanoid creature that dwells in the evil mountains. They are known to enjoy drinking liquor and will take any unguarded supplies of booze.
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