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[Vodrilus]

As the Wookies consider using their claws in combat utterly barbaric, so do the dwarves with their beards.

Why don't rotting body parts ever smell bad outside, under the sun?

[misko27]

Because the dwarves hate the smell of nature anyway, no difference to them.

why do goblins hate dwarves so much if they share a appreciation of torture?

[Monk321654]

Despite it's Memetic status, dwarves Canonically DESPISE any form of torture.
That's right.
They hate you.
It's in the Raws.

Why are zombies so strong?
They're rotting.

[Corai]

There not actually zombies, there Armok's SWAT-team. The rotting stuff is actually there Armok-brand armor.

Why does Armok never directly come to screw with us?

[WaffleEggnog]

Because he is actuly a huge troll. Also because then there would be no fun.

Why do ravens and buzzards enjoy dive-bombing so much?

[MaximumZero]

Because he is actuly a huge troll. Also because then there would be no fun.

Why do ravens and buzzards enjoy dive-bombing so much?

My daughter is named Raven. Even she likes to divebomb me. I have no idea why, but when I figure it out, she's toast.

Why don't the dwarves make decorative weapons (platinum, gold, electrum, etc.)?

[Monk321654]

Would you make something out of soft metal?
Dwarves don't care how it looks, only how it works.

Why are Minecarts so lethal?

[WaffleEggnog]

Why is getting hit by a car so lethal? Same reason.

how can elves be so much less cool then dwarves?

[Argonnek]

They don't mine, they don't drink habitually, and they are whiny and petty about the smallest things. "A goblet? Made of Clear Glass!? Blasphemy!"

Why is it that I never get vampire migrants?

[Kassil]

You do, they're just principled and only drink animal blood.

Why are elves horrified by harming plants but fine with eating sapient creatures?

[MaximumZero]

You do, they're just principled and only drink animal blood.

Why are elves horrified by harming plants but fine with eating sapient creatures?

Plants can't defend themselves. Fuck Goblins.

Why haven't the dwarves invented beard armor?

[misko27]

They have, its just not very effective.

Why are dwarves so determined to finish a fight they will drag their bleeding bodies to the enemy in a effort to get in one last hit?

[Komra]

Armok likes his offering to be spread across the battlefield, left from the paths of near-dead, fanatical warriors.

Why cant dwarves make rock beds? It's not that much worse than a plank of wood, after all.

[Loud Whispers]

Urist McObservent has slept on the cavern floor recently.

Where the HFS do these caravans keep coming from?

[Orky_Boss]

Armok understands that dwarves hate the outdoors and get bored with seiges, so he makes nice big dwarven playgrounds in which for dwarves to frolic, dig metal, get attacked by Forgotten Beasts, and generally just have a load of !!FUN!!.

Why are most dwarves so lazy?