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[cyberTripping]

Dwarves constantly emit an aura of destruction. This is why misfortune is abound in fortresses, aura singularities summon horrible monsters and giant armies. This radiation damages the high-exposure clothes. However, as dwarves are the best armoursmiths in the land, they are able to aura-proof armour. However, it needs to be a particular armour design, any old article just won't cut it.

Dwarven engineering knows no bounds.



Why can't I mulch my gardens with the bodies of dead enemy soldiers? It's a waste of good nutrition is what it is.

[Aslandus]

They tried stuffing corpses into the wood burner to make corpse ash to put on the plants, but it ended up making a really bad smell and stuffing up the burner with blood and viscera, so they stopped.

Why can't they just use a giant blender?

[Arcvasti]

Because they need every serrated blade for the huge trap hallways the overseer keeps building everywhere, convinced that the fortress is infested with kobolds. No one has the heart to tell them the only casualties of the arsenal of weapon traps are a couple dwarves who fell asleep in the middle of the hallways because kobolds are trap-avoid.

How exactly does a huge Forgotten Beast prance nimbly through a gauntlet of cave traps while an itsy bitsy kea gets got in them?

[Tawa]

The forgotten beast took ballet classes.

Why do kobolds seemingly have their own language,.but are unable to speak?

[Arcvasti]

They have recognized an important truth: No one really cares if other people are listening to them or not, they just like the sound of their own voice. Long ago, the kobolds, devised a language, or lack thereof, which made everyone happy. Every kobold could babble on to everyone else to their heart's content but no one is listening because its vaguely adorable gibberish. This makes kobold courtship rituals the most... interesting of all sentient races.

Can Forgotten Beasts find love?

[TheFlame52]

They have recognized an important truth: No one really cares if other people are listening to them or not, they just like the sound of their own voice. Long ago, the kobolds, devised a language, or lack thereof, which made everyone happy. Every kobold could babble on to everyone else to their heart's content but no one is listening because its vaguely adorable gibberish. This makes kobold courtship rituals the most... interesting of all sentient races.

Can Forgotten Beasts find love?

Yes. I'm pretty sure that was a feature of some succession fort or another - the dwarves killed an FB's wife and daughter, then it.

What do I do with all these demons? Making demonade isn't implemented yet.

[Tawa]

Dig out a room, and carve the walls into fortifications. Dig a hallway outside of the room and build windows on the outsides of the fortifications, i.e. in the hallway directly around the fortification wall. Put the demons in the room. Set the hallway as a meeting area. Perform !!science!! on the effect of demons on the dwarven psyche.

How did the first anvil come into existence?

[Uristocrat]

The first anvil was given to the Dwarves by Armok himself, of course.  It was a bone anvil made during a strange mood.

If an elf is burned to death in the forest and there's no one there to hear it, does it make a sound?

[TheFlame52]

1. Elves scream when on fire
2. There are trees in a forest
3. Trees can hear
4. Elves can talk to trees

Therefore, it does make a sound and we can prove it.

Why do artifacts burn forever?

[Bumber]

Why do artifacts burn forever?

Artifacts are infused with the power of beards/eyelashes and are constantly regrowing as they burn.

If an tree is burned to death and there's no elf around to hear it, does it make a sound? Does it make a sound even if there is?

[Tawa]

No, because the only sound in Dwarf Fortress is the unending guitar solo, symbolizing the inevitability of your fortress's end.

How do dwarves brew alcohol and a single mushroom into biscuits?

[Arcvasti]

"Biscuits" is a loose term for anything that is A: Sort of solid and B: Vaguely round/square shaped. With a plump helmet and some booze, this can be accomplished by mushing the plump helmet into a vaguely biscuit-like shape and then pouring booze in it and setting it on fire. The end result is a blackened rubbery mess, but who cares? Raw plump helmets taste even worse.

How does one "mince" water?

[Uristocrat]

To mince water, you grind some bones into bonemeal (off camera), turn the water into a gelatin, then mince it.

Is setting an elf on fire with flaming booze good entertainment or a waste of precious booze?

[crazyabe]

Both.


why do toads not make games in the game?

[Pencil_Art]

There is only one who can, and he exists in our world.

Why do dwarfs not retreat to their rooms to make vile scumbabies?