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[Aslandus]

Why do I always seem to look away from eleborately built traps that need manual activation at EXACTLY the wrong moment to look away from them?

Activating traps always takes second priority to watching your dwarves eat cheese

How can a lamb prevent a dwarf from passing through a tile but thousands of whales can fit in it if all but one are lying down?

When lying down, animals lose all mass and essentially disappear from existence. It is still unclear how a duckling takes up the same amount of space as a dragon, but Dwarven physics is always working on solutions.

Why do all my woodcutters choose the middle of an ambush to go outside when the designation has been active since 6 months prior?

[Eric Blank]

They were on break up till that point.

Why do glassmakers not go fill their own bag of sand to use on a project if there aren't any in the stockpiles?

[WanderingKid]

Why do glassmakers not go fill their own bag of sand to use on a project if there aren't any in the stockpiles?

Unions!  You wouldn't want to put that poor sandbag stuffer out of a job, now would you son?  No, of course not.  You're not being efficient, you're taking food out of the mouths of that poor soul!  Now, please, don't question the labor union... we only have your best interests and our union fees in mind.

On the subject of sand though, how is it that sand was QSP'd before dwarven arrival?  I've built entire towers out of a single square meter of sand!

[Monk321654]

Sand is the remains of worn away rocks. Sand grains in and of themselves are really tiny rocks. Clearly, Dwarves learned their QSP tactics from sand.

How can clay do the same stuff?

[jcochran]

Clay is even smaller rocks ... mixed with a bit of water. Which reminds me. Aquifers. Clearly dwarves learned the concept of QSP from aquifers first, not sand.

So why does a single aquifer tile have an infinite amount of water?

[Dwarf4Explosives]

Sand is the remains of worn away socks. Sand grains in and of themselves are really tiny socks.

Fixed that for you.

Aquifer's are Armok's attempt to expand his godly repertoire into fields other than magma, so as to increase the number of his adherents that survive.

Why is the amount of clowns in a clown car so small? Half the standard population cap seems rather little for an event that is marked as "endgame" in the raws.

[Aslandus]

Why is the amount of clowns in a clown car so small? Half the standard population cap seems rather little for an event that is marked as "endgame" in the raws.

Armok wasn't expecting you to change the population cap to 4

How do dwarves not overheat from wearing 3 layers of clothes in a tropical biome?

[Pakkanen]

How do dwarves not overheat from wearing 3 layers of clothes in a tropical biome?

Whenever dwarves drink a form of liquid, be it booze or water their beards absorb all of the liquid that gets splashed on it. <= This explains the location of the beard on the dwarven body.
The beard then acts as a reservoir distributing the needed dose of water/beer to keep the body cool. This once again shows the symbiotic nature of the beard.

Why do dwarves let their wells overflow? Why dont they use some kind of cover for it?

[Baffler]

Because if they covered the well, how could any dwarf drink from it?

Why will the merchants happily accept tattered clothes and other rubbish in exchange for food, booze, and metal bars?

[Erils]

Because they know that the market for tattered clothes is just in a small slump and are investing for when it skyrockets.

Why do dwarves seem to have a lust for death and !!FUN!! and will even kill each other or themselves in order to achieve !!FUN!!?

[kero42]

Because they know that the market for tattered clothes is just in a small slump and are investing for when it skyrockets.

Why do dwarves seem to have a lust for death and !!FUN!! and will even kill each other or themselves in order to achieve !!FUN!!?

A:They don't, their Overseers do. The dwarves are just the victims of said crusade for !!FUN!!, due to being so prone to it.

Q: Why do the ice walls always unfreeze into 7/7 water, regardless of how much it was before freezing?

[Knit tie]

Q: Why do the ice walls always unfreeze into 7/7 water, regardless of how much it was before freezing?

Same reason why you can build a glass fort from the sand from a single tile.

Why do dwarves have "clean shaven" beards sometimes?

[jcochran]

A clean shaven dwarf is a dwarven hippie.

Why does it seem every goblin has "extremely long hair"?

[WoobMonkey]

Because any time a goblin barber goes near a pair of scissors, somebody dies.

Why do dorfs with high creativity still craft the same old stuff?

[kero42]

"The same old stuff? Are you blind? Do you not see that when Urist McCreativeCraftsdwarf made that turtle shell earring, he was making a commentary on the current state of affairs in our fair nations crafting industry? That, with the forging of this item, we must now re-evaluate the way we look upon all crafts made, in both future and past? Why, it's so terribly obvious, to anyone who understands art. " 

Why are dwarves so willing to believe it when a vampire blames a baby for their kills?