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[LoneChipmunk]

Because that Yak was especially fond of Aban Govoskonos, and is sad that s/he has gone mad.

Why is it the longer it takes for the goblins to seige, the worst the first siege feels like it will be?

[WanderingKid]

Why is it the longer it takes for the goblins to seige, the worst the first siege feels like it will be?

Anticipation is half of terror.  The gobbos understand that.

Is it possible to build a dwarf fortress game WITHIN dwarf fortress using logic gates?

[Dwarf4Explosives]

Very nearly. I haven't done the calculations, but you'd need more embark space than you can select, maybe 50x50 to 75x75 squares. About 100x100 if you allow for catsplosions and the like.

Why don't the civilizations of the world get scared enough of the madness inside the fort to attack en mass?

[wierd]

This is a trick question:  it has similarities to "if the train wreck is so unendurably horrible to look at, why don't you look away?"

Basically, what they *do* know about what happens inside dwarven fortresses is so terrible for them, that they don't dare shatter what remaining illusions of love, peace, harmony and joy they have left by traveling there themselves to know for sure.

Basically, it's so horrible that nobody want to even get near one. (Except the goblins. They are angry that the dwarves won't let them in for the parties, and so come party crashing. Yes, that's the real reason they show up.)

Thankfully, concentrated horrors like that are not self-sustaining, requiring prodigious numbers of living bodies to work with, and naturally leaving a profound scarcity of same after the fact.

So, this begs the question: what would happen if dwarven fecundity and rate of maturation were turned up enough to overcome this problem, and reach critical mass?

[WoobMonkey]

Because if it weren't, we'd no longer be visited by the glorious hordes of spambots - and what fun would life be, then?

Why are so many dwarfen societies emblemized with basic geometric patterns, in a world full of such fun and exciting creatures and events?

[wierd]

It has to stand out.

In a world where brutality, bloodshed, eldritch horrors, and literal demons from the abyss enslaving whole nations and peoples are "every day" occurences, then simple geometric shapes and patterns stand out.  It's very Avant-Garde.

Hypothetical question:

If you took free-lovin' hippy elves from the surface and transplanted them to cavern layer 3, where the "local fauna" don't obey the "peace with nature" BS, how long would they last?

[4maskwolf]

Depends on if they find a cave dragon or not.  Probably two days without, five seconds with.

How many clerks could a clerks office clerk if a clerks office could clerk clerks?

[Erils]

How many clerks could a clerks office clerk if a clerks office could clerk clerks?

None. The clerk's offices are not magma proof and would therefore be destroyed along with any 'unlucky' clerks or cheese makers inside when the magma gate is opened. And how many dwarven clerks do you know of?

Do actual dwarfs get insulted by the stupidity of dwarves in Dwarf fortress?

[Aslandus]

Do actual dwarfs get insulted by the stupidity of dwarves in Dwarf fortress?

They're absolutely livid, but they keep quiet about it because they don't want the magma reservoir emptied into their home
How do dwarves stuff an infinite amount of items into a garbage zone, but only store 1 stone in a space normally?

[WoobMonkey]

Phase transition.  Once an object has been forbidden, its very solidity is undermined.  This allows for all of the atoms in all of the things to be crushed together far closer than the normal laws of electrodynamics would allow.

Why don't dwarfs ever write essays or treatises on the physics of their amazing engineering?

[Erils]

Why don't dwarfs ever write essays or treatises on the physics of their amazing engineering?

Because then the elves and goblins would steal all their secrets.

Why don't dwarves understand that, no matter how much they yell that they need silk for their artifact, I don't have any silk at the moment and can't get any? Why not just use wool?

[locustgate]

Why don't dwarves understand that, no matter how much they yell that they need silk for their artifact, I don't have any silk at the moment and can't get any? Why not just use wool?

Because it's not silk.

Why do dwarves kill themselves, because of a lack of chairs, when they are in a room with 34 chairs, there are only 14 dwarves?

[Rose]

Those are public chairs.

they want their own.

Why do my dorves tolerate when I make them build an above-ground structure?

[Urist McRas]

They treat any structure as a doomsday device designed to kill everybody including themself. From that point of view above ground or under ground are virtually the same.

Why don't dwarfs give their children some physical work to make them stronger?

[Eric Blank]

Because that would be unethical, regardless of the consequences of them growing up to have less muscle mass than the mushrooms they eat. And because the little brats won't pay attention for more than thirty seconds.

Why do dwarves insist on taking a bath to wipe the blood off their feet, then go and walk right back through a stream of blood, and go back to bathe AGAIN?