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[kero42]

Where do turkeys and other similar birds get all the energy and nutrition to produce the large clutches of eggs they lay without actually needing to eat anything?

A: Reincarnation, of a sort. When animals die, their souls float about in some astral realm. Turkeys and other egg layers (abominations that they are) can tap into this realm, consuming the poor things, before plopping them out as eggs, ready for consumption/fertilization. Souls not consumed in this way eventually disperse into spores to be used in live births.

Q: How come all creatures can see 360 degrees without turning round?

[Grey Goo]

Byakugan...

How elven caravan can carry elephants? Or was it already answered?..

[acetech09]

Byakugan...

How elven caravan can carry elephants? Or was it already answered?..

The elven caravan doesn't carry elephants. As we all know, cages are just portals to an infinite, empty, time-locked universe unique to each cage. The elves are just carrying a cage regardless of what's inside it. Granted, the mass of the cage = the mass of the universe + mass of cage material, so the cage is heavy, but they can just kinda roll it along on the ground.

Is the cutebold secretly a kobold survival mechanism? I find myself letting the little buggers go much more often, the more I see cutebold pics.

[Eric Blank]

The cutebold is as much a survival mechanism as it is propaganda. The kobolds are trying to increase their chances of getting away with shiny things.

How can a dwarf that hasn't had contact with others in a century, namely a vampire sequestered away half a mile form the rest of the fort, be considered well-known to the dwarves when a dwarf that hasn't been seen in only a week be considered missing?

[Matoro]

How can a dwarf that hasn't had contact with others in a century, namely a vampire sequestered away half a mile form the rest of the fort, be considered well-known to the dwarves when a dwarf that hasn't been seen in only a week be considered missing?

The dwarven hivemind and the dwarven stupidity.

You know, because of hivemind, all dwarves have contact with each other. They can hate or love each other, but they all have metaphysical bond between them, non-understandable for human brains. They know that the vampire of your example is there, because they can feel it through their hivemind. They also remember that the vampire was a famous, so he's well-known for everyone, even if nobody hasn't actually seen him for a decades.

And what comes to being misisng, it is an illusion created by slow dwarven brain mechanisms. While those locked vampires still produce signals to the hivemind everyone can hear, missing dwarves don't (since they are dead). However, their existance echoes in the hivemind - dwarven brain works so slowly, that they understand things only about week after it has happened. So the signals of someone's hivemind coexistance will echo for the dwarves for about week until the dwarves get the updated information.

What is the light blue thing in brooks and streams, and why does brook/stream contain just as much water as does river?

[LoneChipmunk]

The light blue atop brooks and streams is a strange type of 'hard water' that dwarves admire for being able to hold up an entire wagonload of goods. They contain the same amount of water as a river because it takes a lot of water to support 'hard water'.

Why is it dwarves refuse to run inside if I allow the courtyard burrow, but when I forbid it they rush right in like they should do?

[Nidilap]

Because Dwarves are socially rebellious.

Why do Elves give wood to People, even if they worship trees?

[jcochran]

Because they're hypocrites.

Why does water have pressure and magma doesn't?

[acetech09]

Armok couldn't give dwarves too much power or his own reign would be in jeopardy.

Why don't dwarves get infectious diseases?

[jcochran]

Forgotten beasts serve that function.

Why won't this thread die?

[Nidilap]

Because they think that your fortress is the beacon of a new hope for their family's future...
The poor fools.

If one human grew a great beard, would he be able to assimilate to the Dwarven people, eventually taking them over?

[LoneChipmunk]

No. The Dwarves would know that his Beard if the False Beard and would reject his claim to power. This, of course, only applies if he manages to survive drinking enough alcohol to prove himself a Dwarf and doesn't die due to alcohol poisoning.

Why do Dwarves never succumb to alcohol poisoning?

[Putnam]

Triple-sized livers. (Seriously, it's in the raws!)

Why do humans never succumb to alcohol poisoning?

[aiseant]

Because my Urists always buy the whole stock of wine before they can even taste it, let alone get drunk.

Why children dwaves refuse to work, when we know they perfectly can ? (a snatcher just "freed" a legendary bone carver child, and I'm not even mad)

[Maul_Junior]

Because Dwarf Children are all playing a game called "Nobility"

This may not be the place, but I got the DF bug again after a few months of not playing, and came to the forums.

Decided I wanted to read an AAR, and picked Spearbreakers. Fine, it's a sequel to Syrupleaf which is a sequel to Headshoots. Gotta read those first.

Just got done with Headshoots.


....the FUCK was that?

That was.....weirder than Boatmurdered.



I need more.

That was awesome.



wasn't sure where to post this, but the wtf thread seemed like a decent place as any.


What's the most insane way you've ever lost a fortress?