(Alright, first ever succession game! I'll try to do a little story with it and try not to screw up too bad. Thanks again to Fievreux for starting all of this!
Also if people want to be dwarfed or have other requests I'd like to accommodate, so I'll do Flandre and if anyone else has requests please let me know! Finally, I'm using the Lazy Newbs Pack which like Zanziik I highly recommend. I've actually always played with the Phoebus 31.25v21 tileset but I switched to ASCII because that's what was directed in the original post [and it's the only one that seems to work properly with the save]. Bear in mind that this is literally my first time playing DF in the default ASCII, so I have absolutely no idea what I am looking at. I cannot even begin to describe the
wave of terror that washes over me just looking at the screen, never-the-less thinking about playing a whole year.)
Captain's Log, Dwarfdate 1st Granite, 9.0
Bah! I can't believe I'm being sent out to oversee some Ertal-forsaken expedition to some hill in the shrublands. A dwarf's place is in the mountains I say! Leave the pointy-ears to their trees and their shrubs while the dwarfs do real living in the rocks. But General's Miserith's orders are orders. At least I'm told there's some valuable ore to be found out here. Once I find the leader of the Akrulbembul expedition that was sent out here I'll have him fill me in on what they've found so far.
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"You there, with the clean shaven sideburns and the double braided mustache, be you Minkot Medtobiden?"
"Aye lad, who wants to know?"
"I've been sent from the Mountainhomes to oversee your operation here. Let's both grab some rum and you can tell me all about what you've been up to out here."
"Well...I'm afraid we haven't any rum at the moment lad"
"Oh right, start of the year-the Sweet Pod harvest must not have come in yet I take it? Well I'm partial to ale too if you have some left from autumn"
"No...no we don't have any ale from autumn..."
"Oh bloody...don't tell me I'll be stuck drinking wine the whole time I'm here! For the love of Guthstak, I know those plump helmets grow like a dwarf's beard but I say a dwarf cannot live on Mushroom Wine alone!"
"Umm...the good news is you won't be stuck drinking wine..."
"Oh, so you'll have beer then. Good! Why didn't you just say so? Now let's grab some and tell about what you're mining out here."
"There's no beer either."
"..."
"..."
"Hell's teeth! I know what's going on here...the elves got to you didn't they? Have you been living off of Strawberry Wine and forgotten what a real drink is?! I told them this was no place for a dwarf!"
"There's no alcohol at all"
"What?!"
"None."
"What?!""...We have water."
"What?!""What the hell have you been doing out here?!"
"We slayed a great secreting beast!"
"Did it secrete booze?"
"No"
"Then I don't care!"
"You're supposed to be looking for valuable ore!"
"Mostly we've been fishing and gathering plants"
"You don't look like a fisher or a farmer to me"
"I've been brushing up on my social skills"
"That's elf-talk for slacking off!"
Suddenly another dwarf comes running up, a panicked look on his face!
"Minkot! Minkot! They're back! It's horrible!"
"What's going on? Who is this?"
"It's Sakzul Bemkolikot, our militia commander. It's alright Sakzul, they can't hurt you now"
"Who are you talking about? Who's "they"?"
Minkot gets a very serious look on his face. His brow furrows and his eyes darken. Barely above a whisper, he speaks his next words like a curse.
"The turkeys""Are you all insane?! I'm taking you both to a doctor to get your heads examined!"
"There is no doctor"
"What?! How can you put dwarfs' lives on the line in an expedition without a doctor! Someone ought to be arrested!"
"There is no sheriff"
"GAH! Who's managing this fortress?!"
"There is no manager"
"ARG!"
"No wonder everything is such a mess in this fort! Is that...is that magma flooding the entrance?!"
"No, that's just red sand. They use the same ASCII symbol. Let me show you where the magma really is!"
"It's nice to know the Hill of Fire lives up to its name at least. Was it really necessary to channel that long line of magma for one smelter?"
"Yes. Yes it was. Any other questions?"
"Is that giant cave spiderweb just floating on top of the magma?"
"It's there to remind our smelters they could be attacked at any time by both giant cave spiders and flaming magma creatures. Possibly giant flaming magma cave spiders"
"Maybe we should wall off these caverns so they aren't attacked by giant flaming magma cave spiders."
Minkot just laughs and shakes his head. "No, no, the real threat is on the surface...
the turkeys."
"Can you at least tell me why we went from one staircase to nine of them right next to each other?"
"Nine staircases is nine times faster!"
"And what happened to this room? Why are there pillars in the middle of now where? Why is a little bit of it smoothed?"
"I can explain that! You see, we were all drinking the last of our alcohol and...well, my memory is a little hazy after that"
"Do you have any normal rooms in this fortress?"
"Of course we do! Let me show you the bedrooms!"
"Those aren't bedrooms! They're just beds behind a door!"
"Now that's not true. Some of them don't have doors! And besides, my room has a bucket."
"Why does your room have a bucket?"
"I like buckets!"
"Well at least there's a good reserve of food. Stockpiled right on top of the refined coal. Which is good for when I snap and burn this place to the ground."
"There is an oyster engraved in the lowest possible quality on the floor of, of, of whatever room this is!"
"Yes. He is The Gloomy Trooper. He will be forever remembered"
"Remembered for what?!"
"Being an oyster"
"ARG! This is insane! Have you all accomplished anything of value the entire time you've been out here?!
"We've made artifacts! An amulet, a cup and a scepter"
"All of those combined aren't worth enough to get me a ride back to the mountainhomes! (seriously, the most valuable one is the cup and it's only worth 8400) Haven't you done something worthwhile?!"
"We built a log cabin"
"Let me guess, is this cabin for the oyster?"
"Of course not! Oysters are meant to be memorialized in stone, not kept in cabins!"
"Why did you build the cabin then?"
"I don't know"
"..."
"..."
"You've all been away from the mountains too long! You've all gone mad! I knew coming out here for precious ores was a bad idea!"
"Oh, we did find gold"
"Gold?! Really?"
"Yes, and platinum!"
"Show me!"
"Maybe there's some hope for this fortress after all..."
(I'm EST so it's already 5:30 AM in the morning and I've gotten no sleep. I've spent 5 hours on this and have not even unpaused the game yet. I'll try to finish my turn ASAP and post updates when something important happens. I'm having a hell of a time finding anything or understanding what I'm seeing because again, this is the first time I've ever used the original ASCII-my only other exposure to it has been reading stuff like Boatmurdered. And yes, I remembered what magma looked like from that and really did think the red sand was magma at first. Also, editing screenshots in MS Paint is harder than it should be.
I can't tell if I'm so confused because things actually are insane or if I just don't understand what's going on. Any kind of comments about the screenshots that would help me understand them would be greatly appreciated. If anyone's still reading this thank you very much for your time! That's all for now. I hope you guys are enjoying this more than I am!)