sheesh. reading all of this is making me sad and worried about the rest of the world.
looking back i'm starting to think my childhood was quite nice.
I can count on the number of my right hand the times i was ever slapped.
And it's three.
The first for walking twice in a fountain in february when i was 3 or 4.
the second when i adamantly refused something which i can't recall.
The third was for "saying to many no". at something. i was taking it as a joke, my mother thought it was a "snobbish" way of answering.
my father never even touched us. Never. But he was as scary as hell. Just the hypothesis of HIM getting angry was enough. More than enough. He would at the maximum raise his voice, just a little.
Point is, i didn't grew up an evil punk-bastard serial killer because i was never hit, or because i was hit, and i feared punishment.
i never go to disco, i hate it as a place, it's too noisy. And i'm not an alcoholic. And i'm not a jerk who answers in a bad way. YOu don't have to tell me things twice for me to answer them.
i might be a little lazy, seeing how my father enjoyed taking afternoon naps and then work at night, since he worked from home.
But that's about it.
Furthermore, the thing of "parent-teams" is quite over-rated, my mother was there for the 98% of times for me and my brother, my father just for the 2%, but that 2% was worth far more than all the 98% percents of mothers.
Because with my mother, you couldn't do things Because YOU HAD NOT TO.
With my father, it was more of the "what do you think will happen if you do it?" "try it" "go ahead, i'll call the ambulance" it was enough. Far more than enough.
i can even relate to kaijyuu situation, since after all i do have a brother who tried it.
It just took him a couple of days usually.
He did something bad, he got grounded, he moaned he wanted to go to the pc, my mother by the night/next day had already forgiven him.
And i did think it was unfair, though whenever my elevn years old self pointed it out, my mother didn't even answer. Sheesh, i was smarter than all of them put together.
"he's going to end up thinking everything is due to him" *i said
"whatever, he did enough let him go" *mother
"i warned you" *myself.
*going into the future*
"how could you fail miserably at the last year of high school?!"*mother to my brother
"i thought they'd let me pass!" * my brother.
"better if i keep quiet on this thing here" * myself, closing the door of my room. Smiling the hell out of me for having known this would have happened.
The fact is, in a vast majority of cases, parents should listen to their childrens, sheesh, just because you're 23 to 40 years old it doesn't mean your always right and your children is always wrong. Especially if you have two or more Usually listening to the smart one of them helps you prevent certain things.
obviously you must come to understand who's smart and who's not.
Another smart case was the following:
"should we look at dragonball?" "yes" "can we look at the simpson?" "no they are ineducative".
i kept silent. truthfully speaking, between a fighter-anime where people get killed every tot episodes, and the simpsons which is more humour than anything else...and where rarely you can recreate the same situations...and which also has some sort of family morality in it...
But still, after my "genius" brother decided to try a kamehameha throwing himself down from the bed and ending face-front against the floor, no more dragonball.
And yet no simpsons.
i had seventeen years when they gave me the "ok" to watch the simpsons.
i think that growing a child or more is a thing of compromises. You make compromises when you marry, you must make them when you get to have childrens.
there are things you can do and things you can no longer do.
If you have a two years old, you don't bring him to the restaurant when you want.
You bring him to your grandmother house, where you can tell him how to do things.
Or to your cousins house, or somewhere else where you can teach them.
Only afterwards you bring them to a restaurant.
Same for other things. You can at least give them the theory part Before bringing them somewhere.
"in a cinema you must not yell, cry, or make noises." said an hour before, and repeated for an hour, is better than going to the cinema, sitting down, and then saying
"FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP CRYING!"
Author
Topic: Child harnesses/Child leashes (Read 16747 times)