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[Vector]

My parents, as they always say with a little disgust, have never punished me in any way outside of lecturing.

Seriously.  They occasionally try to make up for it, because apparently it's necessary to have a certain amount of punishment in one's life.

[MetalSlimeHunt]

My parents, as they always say with a little disgust, have never punished me in any way outside of lecturing.

I wish to point out that it seems to be whenever you sense injustice on this forum, your response is a lecture, thus proving my point further. Not that I'm saying that's a bad thing. Lectures are good for educating those who will listen.

Seriously.  They occasionally try to make up for it, because apparently it's necessary to have a certain amount of punishment in one's life.

Now this is a little concerning. What....exactly do your parents do when trying to "make up for it"?

[Heron TSG]

If you teach your children through violence, that's what they'll learn to be a legitimate solution to their problems. Children mimic the actions of their caretakers, and so violence begets violence.

I was corporally punished as a child and I am one of the least violent people I know. Wrongdoing incurred a warning or two followed by some spanking if necessary. I'm even a pseudo-pacifist.

My parents, as they always say with a little disgust, have never punished me in any way outside of lecturing.

I wish to point out that it seems to be whenever you sense injustice on this forum, your response is a lecture, thus proving my point further. Not that I'm saying that's a bad thing. Lectures are good for educating those who will listen.

Punching people through the internet does not work very well, either.

[Vector]

What else would I do?  Punch them?

XD

I have picked up sticks and threatened people IRL, however.  They were on the verge of torturing a rabbit to death.  Or anally raping it with a piece of wood, rather, which I count as about the same thing.

Uh, and this was when I was 9 years old or so, so Powers that Be, please don't charge me with assault or brandishing.  I was already punished by the school system.


When it comes to "more punishment," it's just yelling at me for something like skipping class once in a while (in a course where the professor is basically eating out of my hand).  Something they would have let me off for or even encouraged when I was young, but they think needs more yelling now.  Then I tell them I'm stressed and they tell me to rest more in the time I don't have; and when I try to explain my reasoning for skipping, usually a reason that's actually pretty responsible (just not prioritizing time spent in class), they inform me that they're punishing me because I wasn't punished in my youth--so I've grown up incapable of hearing dissent.

Naturally, they call me up every evening and ask how class was.

[MetalSlimeHunt]

What else would I do?  Punch them?

XD

Ragequit? Spam or troll them? Make ill-informed arguments? Be the Internet Tough Girl and make death threats?

I have picked up sticks and threatened people IRL, however.  They were on the verge of torturing a rabbit to death.  Or anally raping it with a piece of wood, rather, which I count as about the same thing.

That's sort of an extreme situation, and I'm presuming that the threats were enough, unless you're leaving out the part where you nearly beat your classmates to death. Threats fall more under diplomacy than violence.

[Vector]

... Oh, I thought those all fell under lecturing >_>  Okay...


Nah, I didn't beat anyone with it.  I just got the stick, blocked their way, and shouted "Thou shalt not pass."

I was a bit of a chivalry fangirl.

[Lysabild]

... Oh, I thought those all fell under lecturing >_>  Okay...


Nah, I didn't beat anyone with it.  I just got the stick, blocked their way, and shouted "Thou shalt not pass."

I was a bit of a chivalry fangirl.

*Adds 10+ points to the Awesome side of Vector.*

[Heliman]

they inform me that they're punishing me because I wasn't punished in my youth--so I've grown up incapable of hearing dissent.

That...doesn't make sense at all. I've seen you so worked up here on the forums that you were practically inventing the dissent yourself!

[Vector]

That...doesn't make sense at all. I've seen you so worked up here on the forums that you were practically inventing the dissent yourself!

In other words, I can't stand people criticizing me.

*Adds 10+ points to the Awesome side of Vector.*

Hehehe, thank you =)

[Heliman]

That...doesn't make sense at all. I've seen you so worked up here on the forums that you were practically inventing the dissent yourself!

In other words, I can't stand people criticizing me.

Lol, that works too if you wanna spin it negatively!

[SalmonGod]

I want to mirror this, and draw the comparrison to dogs as we're doing. If you hit your dog, it'll see you as a stronger male and will attack you if you ever show weakness.

If you train and raise it with love it'll whine next to your leg in worry when you show weakness.

People aren't that different.

I agree with this 100%

The only purpose I've ever seen for punishment with a kid is to let them know that you will not budge on an issue.  If they will not give up despite all of your attempts at warning on doing something that they cannot be allowed to do, then you have to put your own consequence in place of the natural one you wish to avoid.

The extent you have to go to with this depends greatly on the kid.  Hiro is monumentally bullheaded and single-minded, and any disagreement with him in his toddler years turned into a contest of wills lasting for hours.  I could tell some pretty crazy stories about our fights with him.  Grim just needs a firm pat on the butt and he gets the idea.

[freeformschooler]

The only purpose I've ever seen for punishment with a kid is to let them know that you will not budge on an issue.  If they will not give up despite all of your attempts at warning on doing something that they cannot be allowed to do, then you have to put your own consequence in place of the natural one you wish to avoid.

Not so sure about this. For instance, a year ago, my little brother really wanted a video game that was rated M, quite a bit above his age limit. My mom checked it out through and through, watched videos, heard reviews, etc. and just decided no. So he bugged her. And bugged her. And she ended up punishing him nearly seven times (about five of them were grounding type punishments, no corporal punishment type stuff though as she's never believed in it) just for all the times he would interrupt important things she was doing because of all this, but a month later after all of this he still would not budge. He pestered her several times every day about it, dropping hints into as many lines of conversation as he could.

What was she supposed to do? Remain firm and unmoving? She'd gone back and looked over the game many times. She had a life to get on with. My mom is one of the most firm and consist people I know, and she eventually deemed it, after a total of two months, not worth it to keep him from having this game. So she let him get it.

Really, I don't think just adding more punishment would have stopped my brother. He is the absolute, bar none, most determined person I know when he wants things his way.

[Vector]

My parents nipped that in the bud by teaching me about the failing economy, the job market, and my personal responsibility to become educated before I was five.  I never ask for anything but books and school supplies.

=/

[kaijyuu]

Well, generally if something is worth restricting then it already has a natural consequence attached to it. If a kid absolutely will not let up about wanting to touch a hot stove, let him get burned.

...unless what's being restricted does not have a natural consequence, in which case maybe it's not exactly a just law to be upholding in the first place.



Your brother sounds like a twerp but I'm more or less on his side about having access to a video game (assuming he's paying for it anyway). Hopefully he's not an idiot and as adamant about things with real consequences.

[freeformschooler]

Well, generally if something is worth restricting then it already has a natural consequence attached to it. If a kid absolutely will not let up about wanting to touch a hot stove, let him get burned.

...unless what's being restricted does not have a natural consequence, in which case maybe it's not exactly a just law to be upholding in the first place.

Your brother sounds like a twerp but I'm more or less on his side about having access to a video game (assuming he's paying for it anyway). Hopefully he's not an idiot and as adamant about things with real consequences.

Oh, yeah, I agreed with him 100%, I thought the game was comparatively mild to a lot of the games I've played. My mom believed that he would become a more violent person if he played mostly violent games at such a ripe age (and over the years he has turned into quite the violent lad but it would be silly to just say that was the video games, especially since I've played so many horrid, awful video games and am forever the pacifist), so she believed it was just to be upholding that law.

However, his methods disgusted me, and retroactively moreso as he now believes he can get anything he wants in life this way (and for many things he CAN, but I find it funny when he wonders why some of the people he's done this to don't like spending time with him).

I believe though that this will stop approximately the first time he tries this on an employer about the amount of work he has to do and then gets fired for it.

Oh yeah, and sorry for derailing this into freeformschooler's awesome yet frustrating brother thread.