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Author Topic: Child harnesses/Child leashes  (Read 16769 times)

Neonivek

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Re: Child harnesses/Child leashes
« Reply #15 on: July 16, 2011, 12:36:38 pm »

As for the "Parents don't pay attention to their child" arguements.

Anyone remember that device that hung a baby to the ceiling? Baby bumper or something?

Well I hear that THAT device did increase the amount of child neglect quite a bit.
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Levi

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Re: Child harnesses/Child leashes
« Reply #16 on: July 16, 2011, 12:39:40 pm »

I don't really think a kid at that age has the capacity to feel undignified.

Hell when I was that age I was stealing my dogs food, so I can't imagine feeling degraded by a leash.
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Vector

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Re: Child harnesses/Child leashes
« Reply #17 on: July 16, 2011, 12:43:28 pm »

Don't they have those daycare thingies where you can drop off kids for a couple of hours? I thought they even have some in malls themselves.

In the US, letting your kid stay with someone else is on the big list of "things that invite sexual abuse."

Not necessarily, of course, but that's the story that's told.  So I can certainly understand why people wouldn't do it.


For what it's worth, my grandfather was dressed up in a dress and herded by sheep dogs when he was a toddler.  I really don't find this harness idea that shocking.
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Aqizzar

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Re: Child harnesses/Child leashes
« Reply #18 on: July 16, 2011, 12:45:51 pm »

Daycares are perfect safe.  The thing is, they cost money, so on top of all the other expenses of a young child, it's more than a lot of people are willing or capable of shelling out.

I don't really think a kid at that age has the capacity to feel undignified.

Undignified no, although you can see them being worn way past when you would expect to.  Sure, makes sense for toddlers, since they run around like wild animals as soon as they can run at all.  When you see a kid who has to be at least four years old being led around on a harness in a grocery store, so his parents don't have to explain to him why he can't take stuff off shelves, I know it has to be degrading.  I can remember being that age, and anything that made me feel like less than a full-grown person felt degrading and undignified (because you're the most important person in the world when you're four).
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Neonivek

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Re: Child harnesses/Child leashes
« Reply #19 on: July 16, 2011, 01:14:28 pm »

Quote
When you see a kid who has to be at least four years old being led around on a harness in a grocery store

Four? I've seen older
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kilakan

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Re: Child harnesses/Child leashes
« Reply #20 on: July 16, 2011, 01:18:14 pm »

I think some of them are just disgusting and incredibly detrimental to a childs health.  Mainly the long retractable ones, because that way the child thinks it is about to get away, and then suddenly it's snapped onto it's ass with major rib bruising.  I've seen people walking down the street, let the toddler run off ahead of them, then just snap him back, the kid starts crying the parent says, "Well it's you own fault" and then walk off dragging the now incredibly unhappy child.
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Neonivek

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Re: Child harnesses/Child leashes
« Reply #21 on: July 16, 2011, 01:20:07 pm »

I guess the problem is that the Leash should be a learning tool and safety device in reering a child.

However it is just used as a lazy harness.

Mind you Leashes are probably one of the best "Don't let your child get away" devices ever made... though that is because its competition are horrible monsters.
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kilakan

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Re: Child harnesses/Child leashes
« Reply #22 on: July 16, 2011, 01:22:27 pm »

I think there should be a training mechanism on them for parents, like every time the child tugs with more then 30 pounds of force (basically with all it's wee little strength, or when it runs to the end of the leash) the parents get a shock, in increasing increments of voltage.  That way they would have to actually teach their child manners or just keep getting shocked :P
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DJ

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Re: Child harnesses/Child leashes
« Reply #23 on: July 16, 2011, 01:25:07 pm »

Do all these people who are deathly afraid of pedos keep their kids locked up in padded rooms? Because there's lots of other stuff that is more likely to happen and can seriously harm or kill your children.
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Re: Child harnesses/Child leashes
« Reply #24 on: July 16, 2011, 01:26:05 pm »

I would be very interested to know how many people posting in this thread have children and then to see if there is a link between being a parent and your opinion. I have 2 young children, dont see any major issues with using this style of harness provided it is for positive reasons as opposed to a default state, and have used them in the past as a last resort. Teaching my kids how to behave has made a harness kind of redundant.

EDIT: improved readability

Neonivek

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Re: Child harnesses/Child leashes
« Reply #25 on: July 16, 2011, 01:27:29 pm »

Do all these people who are deathly afraid of pedos keep their kids locked up in padded rooms? Because there's lots of other stuff that is more likely to happen and can seriously harm or kill your children.

Huh? Those people probably just Swaddle their baby.

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Teaching my lids how to behave has made them kind of redundant

True, I had a problem getting my lids to behave too. Though teaching them with a gentle hand worked onders.
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SalmonGod

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Re: Child harnesses/Child leashes
« Reply #26 on: July 16, 2011, 03:06:45 pm »

Yeah, I get really sick of non-parents flaunting their snide preconceptions of "If all parents weren't lazy, self-absorbed trash, then all children would be perfect little angels in public."  It gets really... really... really old.  You have no idea, as a non-parent, how often these attitudes are encountered when you become a parent.  You have no idea how clueless people can be when, for example, your kid throws a fit in public because you're disciplining them... and somebody yells at you because they think your kid is throwing a fit because you're not disciplining them...  For me, it's a huge lesson in how sickeningly judgmental and intolerant people can be.

Had to get that off my chest.

As for the leashes... I have very mixed feelings about them.  A kid is very deeply effected by their early experiences.  I can imagine use of these things having weird interactions with a kid's feelings about boundaries to their personal freedom and confidence.  Depending on the person, I can see them growing to have amplified rebelliousness or dependence in their personalities.  There is also something fundamentally offensive about the idea.

On the other hand, I can see how it could be incredibly helpful in various situations.  Being the perfect parent all the time simply isn't possible.  People have stress limits.  A perfect saint can become an abusive parent when those limits are crossed.  People have awareness limits and only two hands.  It may look irresponsible to an outsider when a parent cuts corners for their own convenience.  An outsider doesn't know that parent's situation. 

Being a parent is a huge responsibility.  Yes, both non-parents and parents know that we should always strive to do the right thing that is most fair and beneficial for the child.  However, non-parents typically haven't emotionally absorbed what failure as a parent means, which is a dead or extremely fucked up kid.  A responsible parent will do the ideal thing whenever possible, but will also cut corners when doing so reduces a significant likelihood of catastrophic failure.  This balancing act is up to the individual, and is why parents deserve a lot more tolerance and understanding than non-parents like to grant them.

Personally, we've never used a leash.  We have used one of those hands-free carriers on rare occasions.  Usually we just do things together as much as possible, and running away results in me carrying or timing-out the impulsive kid.
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Neonivek

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Re: Child harnesses/Child leashes
« Reply #27 on: July 16, 2011, 03:09:13 pm »

Quote
You have no idea, as a non-parent, how often these attitudes are encountered when you become a parent

Endlessly... how close am I?

I mean if bad parents and reer a good child, by all means great parents and reer a horrible child... I thought we lived in a society that believes in free will.
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The Merchant Of Menace

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Re: Child harnesses/Child leashes
« Reply #28 on: July 16, 2011, 03:12:03 pm »

I personally think the things are horrible, then again, I have issues with being restrained.
I'd never use one,
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Lysabild

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Re: Child harnesses/Child leashes
« Reply #29 on: July 16, 2011, 03:25:17 pm »

Never seen one before this thread, I should have been in one when I was young though :b

Also, don't America have kindergardens and afterschool activity places? Fritidshjem in danish, can't find a good translation, so I guess not.
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