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[TherosPherae]

Or at least, you think. You're not sure who you are, or why you're here, or even where you are, when you hear a voice. It's pretty loud, and immediately starts getting on your nerves. It begins bellowing something about 'them' giving you one more chance, so long as you do as 'they' please. You can't remember anything, so you have no idea as to what chance this is referring to. You can't even see whatever's making the noise, but you look in its general direction anyways. Not too hard, considering you were already facing that way.

You decide to take 'their' offer - after all, another chance can hardly ever be a bad thing, right? And then 'they' have the nerve - the GALL - to ask you to come up with your own name and identity, and figure out where it is you want to go. You don't even know where it is you CAN go. Assholes. Then 'they' mention - through 'their' loud, booming voice-herald-thing, of course - that 'they' can help you think of one, and your mind suddenly floods with ideas. Ideas of castle and knights, princes and pirates, gears and goblins, cans and toasters. There are so many ideas, you're having trouble deciding on which one.

So who are you, and where are you going?

((I've decided to leave the beginning of this very, very open-ended so I don't end up choosing something stupid and overdone. It is not because I'm too lazy to think of stuff. ))

[Dsarker]

Our name is Siegfried, and we're going to the knights and castles one.

[peglegpengeuin]

Our name is Randal Ramirez, and we are captain of the pirates who raid hell. Wait, that's probably really hard to do.
Our name is Randal Ramirez, and we are a gangster. An immortal gangster.

[Cerol Lenslens]

We are Donald MacShaughnessy, shelf stocker for the Chafeway grocery/department store, formerly located in Langdon, California, but now occupying the space between dimensions.

[BunnyBob77]

We are joe mcpersonson, and we are heir to the throne in the kingdom of the toaster pirates! Who may possibly live in or raid hell.
Hey, you mentioned toasters.  I'm just working with what you gave us.

[Powder Miner]

We are Dancing Jim and we will DISCO!

[peglegpengeuin]

We are Samantha Draemer, a tomboy trapped in the world of cartoons.

[Fniff]

We are Johnny Foxtrot, former police officer trying to survive after demons invade the Earth.

[jc6036]

We are homeless joe, the bum on the street corner trying to make it to the top.

[TherosPherae]

You are now Dancing Joe Donald Siegfried Randal Foxtrot Draemer Ramirez McShaughnessy, and you're an immortal interdimensional disco pirate gangster that raids Hell in a world of cartoo- oh no this is stupid. This is really stupid. You would facepalm, but you have no hands.

You kindly request that 'they' narrow down the options for you and decide on something.

[Fniff]

Johnny "Dancing" Siegfried, who is a gangster granted immortality but at the cost of unleashing Hell on Earth.

[Furtuka]

You are the Prince of Toast trying to track down a ship of Goblin skypirates who have stolen a huge shipment of canned goods from Toast Castle

[Fniff]

You are the Prince of Toast trying to track down a ship of Goblin skypirates who have stolen a huge shipment of canned goods from Toast Castle

Eh, you can't really go that far with that plot.

[jc6036]

You are siegfried the infinitley prolonged. You are immortal, and have been since the dark age, unable to adapt to ever changing times, and are now homeless

[Furtuka]

You are the Prince of Toast trying to track down a ship of Goblin skypirates who have stolen a huge shipment of canned goods from Toast Castle

Eh, you can't really go that far with that plot.

No no that is merely your first objective for the tutorial analogue!