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[peglegpengeuin]

No, cybernetic enhancements are cyber-hag's shtick. The Crushinator has to get his own.

The Crushinator needs help before things get worse. Spread propaganda that the Crushinator is being framed by communist terrorist foreigners who hate America and freedom (I assume we're in the U.S.). People should be xenophobic enough for that to work. Just in case it isn't enough, give the Crushinator a fake moustache. As the mayor's trusted adviser, request information on all villains currently held in prison, especially the more heinous ones. I don't know what good evil they'll be, but hey, it's worth investigating.

Also, picture for the new Tax Collector, please. Could just be edited version of the old, with crudely added wig.

EDIT: Might also want to change the thread title to reflect the available player slot.

[Lillipad]

I changed the title. Not changing ST's picture. I probably wouldn't have even been able to write if I hadn't been listening to Tim Curry singing as Doctor Frank-N-Furter.

[quip]

Sweet Transvestite decides to  head out and spend some money from his/her bank. He/She doesn't have any money in the bank of course, but he/she's sure some nice person would let her rob spend all the money in the bank. On the important things, like make up. And jewelry.

[FuzzyZergling]

Using my newfound control over THE MAN, build a skatepark which is also a TEEN INDOCTRINATION FACILITY.

[SeriousConcentrate]

I'm still waiting for your RP Crushinator scheme gain monologue.

Clarify, please. Anyway,

The Crushinator awoke to find a fake mustache on his face. It looked very dapper indeed, bristly and thick enough to cover his upper lip. Like any good gentleman should, he went to find a barber to groom it properly and also perhaps give him a suitable haircut. As the mayor this would be a free service, of course. After that he would let the city know of his plans to improve relations with the criminal element by eliminating the police force, one way or another.

[Krath]

If I think of a good villain for the open spot, I don't need to play as them, do I? 

I'd love to make one and have somebody else play it, but I can't say I'm on enough to participate in this sadly 

[Lillipad]

You don't have to play if you don't want to.

[Krath]

BWAHAHAHAHAHA!

Spoiler: Dapper Man (click to show/hide)

Lethality - 3/10
Hamstring - 5/10
Scheming - Dapper/10
Not dead - 4/10

Kill Power: Drugged Tea and Crumpets - Dapper Man offers everyone nearby a nice meal of crumpets and tea. Unluckily for them, the food is laced with sleeping powder, guaranteed to work for at least one hour.

You need more gentleman villains in this topic.

[Lillipad]

I never actually intended for Crushinator to be a gentleman. In the first turn of actions I was trying to write out a good turn for him, but nothing came to mind, so I thought it'd be funny if I made him like a poor intelligence character from Fallout 2.

I'm still waiting for your RP Crushinator scheme gain monologue.

Clarify, please. Anyway,

When you got your first point and put it into scheming you gave a funny little bit of dialogue in which the Crushinator realizes his vocabulary went from just 'CRUSH!' to 'ME CRUSH YOU!'
I really liked that little dialogue, so I was hoping you'd do one every time you gain a scheme gain(if you gain multiple in one turn just one little thing is okay).
If you were asking about when I asked that, I asked it two or three turns ago in your results paragraph.

[SeriousConcentrate]

Ah, OK. Sorry about that then. ^^ I'll do it next time for sure. :3

[peglegpengeuin]

Bump

[Lillipad]

I didn't realize it had been four days since the last update. I'm gonna organize my thoughts for a bit, then give the update once I can actually think straight.

[Lillipad]

I'm a bit more awake, I've actually had a proper meal, I think I can at least make the train wreck this will probably be somewhat salvageable.

--

Heroes
Spluntastic Teen
Spluntastic Teen goes to The Man to have them build a skate park in honor of the late Bony Bawk, pro skater. He died mysteriously that very morning after having a conversation with a Denny's employee. Whatever...
The Man quickly builds the skate park up to standard safety parameters. Bony's coffin is placed on some skates, and he is properly sent to the grav by being launched into space from a halfpipe somehow. Who knew or cared that was even possible?
Since Denny's seems to be crowded with people, SpluntTeen decides to eat at MickRonald's for lunch. Something seems off about the food lately. It's all square, and wafers. And comes in three colors. This might be worth looking into, but... Must he...?
Whatever. In order to soothe his angst, as he is dangerously close to the Sasuke Limit(hbi2k), SpluntTeen spends the evening at a music store listening to everything but never buying anything, randomly lashing out at customers that buy pop CDs, and generally harassing the managers with his angsty hipster jargon.
Afterward he runs around killing things before going home dreading meeting up with the completely normal ridiculously named woman and Elastisplastasaur Girl before he can get to his dad #1's room. He'd sleep in his dad #2's room, but it appears to be a dog kennel welded to the chimney.
But alas, he does have to talk to the two women, and he angsts out before they can fully ensnare him.

(Perfect roll. All of Dapper Man's hypothetical thugs have been murdered before they even existed!)

Elastisplastasaur Girl
Elasti wakes up feeling renewed by her conquering of Denny's and starts the day off by murderlaying off everyone who suggests bringing back the Grand Slamwich. Ha ha ha HA! She gets her chefs to start gathering materials for an indoctrination burger from the totally innocent pastry factory not two doors down from the main Denny's in the city.
She walks into the kitchens to discover that Grand Slamwiches were in fact made up of industrial waste. So much so, that she slips on some, landing in a puddle of toxic waste.
She summons her corporate goons, and tells them to convert 80% of the janitorial staff into half janitor, half crime fighting vigilante, half pigeon hybrids. She was informed that the pigeon half would have to be cut out due to fractions and genetic not working that way, which crumples her cereal.

Seeing nothing of the Queen, Elasti heads home, and runs into the Queen and SpluntTeen back at the hidden fortress of solituditary. Splunt seems to have a stroke from the mere presence of the two ladies. He must be shy! Dinner consists of not-a-Grand-Slamwich-thank-the-heavens(steak) with a side of spicy green beans and a salad.

Sweet Transvestite
ST Queen wakes up feeling fabulous. So today is going to be fabulous, whether they like it or not! Taking the city by storm, the Queen breaks into the bank while it's open and demands all of their money. Of course thanks to the gentlemen she has escorting him with guns and body armorflowers and candy, he has no trouble getting the money.
Celebrating her recent success, the Queen takes himself to every single store in the city. Buying only the most fashionable of stuff. So fashionable, in fact, that it could be said that he has all the fashion. All of it.

She spends the next few hours collecting indoctrination targets, and sends them to SpluntTeen's skate park so they can become integrated into the police force. After that he heads home and causes SpluntTeen to have a heart attack. Most definitely from being too gorgeous for his childish eyes to comprehend. Stupid kid. Dinner is steak and green beans for some reason.

Villains
The Crushinator
The fine gentleman wakes up to discover that he had forgotten to shave for the past few days, resulting in quite the gentlemanly mustache. Quite gentlemanly indeed!
In order to start his mayoral duties, he goes to the barber to become even more gentlemanly. The gentlemanly-ness of it all sends him on an adventure the author is too lazy to write.
Huzzah!

She Hag
Stuff happens for the Crushinator, and She Hag investigates the heinous thugs in prison.
As it turns out, until very recently there was virtually no crime at all in Spluntastica, so there are no thugs, heinous or otherwise, in the prison at all. Super...

--

I probably forgot something, but I'm too disorganized right now to remember what that is. If anyone noticed anything I forgot just tell me and I'll get it fixed.

[SeriousConcentrate]

"Huzzah!" Crushinator said. He was getting smarter! Whatever that nice old lady was feeding him was great brain food, he had to admit. "Taxes," he added, remembering what the weirdo who had hung around for a few days used to talk about all the time. A small idea was forming in his smaller brain! His butlers anticipated it and quickly formed a conference with the media, where he made his sweeping new proposal for the good of the land: "Me crush taxes! You huzzah!" Surely the people of his fine city would appreciate such a daring proclamation, and indeed, say huzzah like they finished Deadly Towers and never had to play it again!

Afterwards he went to the beach with his cabinet to take the rest of the day off. (Actually he went to the nuclear power plant and bathed in the coolant tanks, stealing some SCIENCE on his way out when he was finished.)

When I get to about four or five scheming I think I'll have him be able to talk partially normally, or at least normally for a three year old. ^^

[peglegpengeuin]

She-hag is still not a robot? Shucks . Oh well, at least I was right about the Crushinator being an economic savant.

Yell at minions for taking too long to make me a cyborg. Also, I really need to figure out what's with Mr. Fantastic and his "boy companion". I wanted to use my new robotic powers to create a pie with robot spider legs and a height-adjustable camera. Such a thing would be perfect for discrete spying in the Fantastic House. Since I can't do that, and I need desperately to know about the Spluntastic Teen, I'll just go there myself. Disguised as a pizza delivery person, of course. And deliver free caustic acid pizza. No, that's just dumb. I'll deliver hallucinogenic pizza. The kind that lasts a really long time. Cause I am a jerk. When I arrive and am not greeted by Mr. Fantastic, ask where he is.

It would be nice if I became a cyborg before delivering the pizza, so the heroes meet an obviously metallic pizza delivery granny.