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[Angel Of Death]

I once entered a town and everyone was killing each other. Also, I once jumped into a river to kill a carp and the first thing it does is rip out my throat and shake me around by it until I die.

[TheCoolSideofthePIllow]

I went to enter a campsite and this is what happened when I entered the local map:

[Powder Miner]

Lol. I had my fifth demigod strength-based all points in a weapon skill pikeman kill a night creature, and then I decided to train. I saw capitla Hs. "Ooh, horses! Training time!" As I tried t strike, I was ripped apart in about half a second by hipps. Me: o.o

[Tsukana]

Me: Ohai mistar band-it. Juss stand steel wheil I throw diz nife @ u.

Bandit: No problem, mate. You know, this is a really nice knife and all, and even through you're three tiles away, I think I'll just give it back to you. Oh! Crap! Sorry! Did -not- mean to spawn cats everywhere. Oh, well, that was inter- Oh what in the bloody hell is that? A Demon? Really?

Me: *Gurgle*

Bandit: No, this is your fault, isn't it? Well, me and my cats will just have to take out our frustration on you while the demon rampages over the camp. Right. To it, boys.

[Edosurist]

I was peacefully walking by a herd of giraffes, when all of a sudden, they charge after me. I thought I could easily take them, but one kicks me onto the ground, knocking me unconcious right next to a river. There, I am dragged in by the carp...

I was stabbed in the ear through my chest armor.

You can't explain that.

FTW
That's so epic, that's gonna be my new signature.

[Tsukana]

Though it has very little grounds in realism, I believe I can in fact explain how one gets stabbed in the ear while the weapon passes through the chest armor.

Standing to the side, crouching, at a STEEP upward angle. It would enter the armor just below where your ribcage is, slide across your flesh, come up in the neck-hole or through the pauldron-area, and pierce said ear.

[nacnud22]

told a axe men too follow me then was going to kill him but instead he cut my leg off and cut me in  half

[Ilirion]

I just made a new world and it seems that every fortress save one in the current area has been abandoned. The only one that isn't only has a lord.

According to the wiki, this happens if the civ has been taken over by a demon, but the lord should be a demon; he's not. He's a human and his description is typical of a weak noble type.

:/

One of the civs in my current world was taken over by an ass brute who is actually quite polite, but none of their fortresses are abandoned and the ass brute has the fortress with the most soldiers.

[Ilirion]

I barely survived an ambush, and one of my swords men seemed to go crazy. He proceeded to kill a miner and a maceman, and the first fortress I found he killed its lord. I did not want to become hostile to my civilization so I left him be and tried to lose him, but he was unfortunately quite good. While raiding the fortress of an enemy civ, however, he started attacking HIMSELF. I cannot describe it in words... He's still trying to bash himself to death with an iron shield.

[Gamerlord]

GIVE US COMBAT REPORTS!!!

[Ilirion]

Etru Poemwanders the Bravery of Courage was just turned into a brain slushy by a boggeyman after the swordsman succeeded in bashing his own ribcage in. What now?

[Gamerlord]

COMBAT. REPORTS. 

[druid91]

The time my modded flyer team (two, but I sorta hung back and watched the other guy) took on an army of cave swallow men in the arena, and the first move it made? Fly up, fly over, and spin kick one into the magma below.

That one then proceeded to single handedly slaughter the entire (They started off with equal skills, and the swallow men had better euipment, but the modded ones are basically silver collossi with the flier tag) Army of swallow men. His sword wouldn't work so he started punching and kicking them to death. Usually causing them to fly all the way to the edge of the arena and lay there stunned.

I knew I'd made them tough... but not that tough...

[kissa3]

COMBAT. REPORTS. 

agreed. in pics.
as far as I know it is IMPOSSIBLE to have someone attack themselves.

he might just have had slamed into an obstacle.

[TheCoolSideofthePIllow]

I am still getting used to the game and while traveling back from a nasty fight against a Minotaur, I was ambushed in the night by a bunch of harpies and ogres. I killed what I thought was all of them, then went back to sleep only to be awoken by more harpies and ogres. This went on for 3 or 4 cycles before I realized that two harpies were flying 3 z-levels above me. Not able to hit them by my normal means of attack, I knapped a rock, throw it at one and managed to cut it's wing off, sending it Earthbound until it hit the ground, whereupon it exploded all over me. The other harpy then ran away like a bat out of Hell allowing me to once again rest for the night.