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YO!

48 (19%)

I suspect I am, but am not diagnosed as such.

32 (12.6%)

NO!

164 (64.8%)

I've been diagnosed as such, but suspect I am not.

9 (3.6%)

Total Members Voted: 252

[Starver]

Sounds fairly arbitrary, assuming that's actually a quote from a "this is how we define 'abnormal' regarding this medical/psychological issue" kind of official document.

For a more mathematically-based arbitrary limit-bounding, I'd treat the areas below and above the 1st and 3rd quartiles as "not normal[2]", on the basis that a solid half of the population are in the bit not worth talking about because they aren't extraordinary in either direction (for this single measure, of course, see my prior point), but whether it's 40% or 50% deviation from population norm (and whether that's in sample-size or axial deviations), then there's likely to be very little difference between a person 1% within the limit and a person 1% without it.  Certainly the measure involved is likely to be swamped by all kind of other individual characteristics not involved in the measure concerned.

Sorry, I'm not sure if this is a point worth making.  This thread's a little deviated, itself, from its original aims.  (And it's doesn't seem worthy to make a joke along the lines of the people likely to contribute to this thread being anal over such small details.)


[2] Further sub-dividing the area (not deviation!) in half again if you really need some sort of "abnormal" equivalent term for the furthest reaches of each near-asymptotic bell-bottoming curve, rather than "just outside the norm".

[Max White]

Hmm, so were up to defining normal. So I didn't miss much! Give it some time before this thread levels up into a full blown political debate over if Aspergers should legally be defined as a disability then, before things get out of hand and it gets locked.
The way nature intended.

[Doomchild-]

Hmm, so were up to defining normal. So I didn't miss much! Give it some time before this thread levels up into a full blown political debate over if Aspergers should legally be defined as a disability then, before things get out of hand and it gets locked.
The way nature intended.

actually here in belgium it is legally a disability but only when diagnosed by certain tests (dont know how it all works, havent done it yet, costs a crapton of cash just to do the test, cant afford it) employers get benefits for employing ppl with aspergers.

[Vector]

Can anyone tell me the number of minutes around which one needs to apologize for being late to a social gathering with a single friend?

Thanks.

Uh, I'm not late, I just realized that I didn't know the answer and tend to apologize if I'm more than three minutes late.

[Mindmaker]

Actually more than three doesn't sound that bad.

Of course, a lot also depends on the situation and the person.
Is he waiting for you in his comfy-cozy home, in a crowded place, outdoors during bad weather etc.

As for me, I always apologize, when I'm late. Depending on if it's more than a couple of minutes, I might also give a reason.

A friend of mine tended to always be late by a quarter of an hour, arriving as cheerful if as nothing ever happened.
It took some angry comments from me, before I even heards something that sounded even remotely like an apology.

When in doubt apologize. It's as simple as that.

[MorleyDev]

If they arrive first and were waiting for me I just ask if they were waiting long. If they say no, unless they look particularly pissed it's a fair bet they either weren't or are acting like they weren't, either way I don't need to apologise ^^ What's the old quote, "It is rarely important how a friend feels but how they want you to think they feel"?

Then again, unless it's a large gathering that stays in one place, I usually am one of the first people to arrive since I tend to get to places pretty much dead on time xD If you say "We're all meeting at 9:00 and going somewhere else at 10:00", 7/10s of people will arrive between 9:40 and 9:50 -.-

[KaelGotDwarves]

One thing that I found that is polite to do and makes people like you more is if you call in advance if you're going to be more than 10 minutes late with a legitimate reason: stuck in traffic, was attending to something else, just simply got out late - rather than making the person wait around wondering what is going on.

In different cultures the "on time" aspect is quite different. In Japan, the society runs like clockwork and the train system will apologise profusely if they are just a minute late. In Thailand, there is actually a concept called "Thai Time" where it is normal for things to have a 30 minute variance period for people to show up and everyone is relaxed/not worried about it. In fact, it's more of a hit towards you if you lose your cool over it than it is for those who are late.

US is fairly strict about being on time, but less so than Japan and more so than Europe is what I have gathered. It also highly depends on what sort of business and people you find yourself meeting with.

[Max White]

Can anyone tell me the number of minutes around which one needs to apologize for being late to a social gathering with a single friend?

Thanks.

When ever there are enough people there that they are beginning to look like they are enjoying themselves. But be realy casual about it, like it is a formality. The number of minutes does not matter, even if you are on time, it is about current social context.

EDIT: Oh, wait, single friend? Then always, unless you don't want to, and in that case, he will expect that of you, so never. Once again, minutes mean nothing.

[Vector]

Huh... this is very complicated.  I guess it's another "try to guess what someone else is thinking" game, rather than a "guess the right number from mass synthesized data" game.

Thank you for your answers.

[Max White]

Huh... this is very complicated.  I guess it's another "try to guess what someone else is thinking" game, rather than a "guess the right number from mass synthesized data" game.

Just about. Normal people do not work rationally with numbers, so trying to work with a numeric figure will not help you. Get out there and grind that social skill!

[Vector]

Just about. Normal people do not work rationally with numbers, so trying to work with a numeric figure will not help you. Get out there and grind that social skill!

;______________;

But my life would be so much easier!

*sigh*

Yeah, back to work :I

[G-Flex]

Since when would assigning a distinct apology cut-off point be "rational"? That's bonkers.

It depends on the situation. And the people. I mean, how wouldn't it? Some things are more important, or more urgent, or more strictly scheduled, or have a greater sense of obligation attached to them for some other reason, and some people get more or less bothered by a lack of punctuality.

[Vector]

Since when would assigning a distinct apology cut-off point be "rational"? That's bonkers.

I start getting offended after 15 minutes.  I was wondering if there was a general cutoff line like that.

I mean, how wouldn't it?

That's why I provided information about the situation...

[Max White]

I start getting offended after 15 minutes.  I was wondering if there was a general cutoff line like that.

Do you sit there, with a watch, keeping track?
My general strategy for people being late is to sit back, relax, and look cool for when they turn up. Anybody that late will be very sorry about it and apologetic about it, and I work well with that. Makes it easy to lead, so to speak.

[Vector]

Do you sit there, with a watch, keeping track?
My general strategy for people being late is to sit back, relax, and look cool for when they turn up. Anybody that late will be very sorry about it and apologetic about it, and I work well with that. Makes it easy to lead, so to speak.

I try not to, but I often end up with a clock because I try to figure out when to stop anticipating and think that they've just called it off (this bar is two hours late, for me).  I usually try to do something while I'm waiting, though.  Just can't be something that takes any concentration.

I don't get pissed off at them or anything, even when they're two hours or more late.  I just feel tense.