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Author Topic: Most Impressive Combat Reports  (Read 35310 times)

Gerottomo

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Re: Most Impressive Combat Reports
« Reply #180 on: February 27, 2012, 08:17:54 pm »

Caravan Guard used his halberd to remove ALL of a Gray Langur's teeth.

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WaffleEggnog

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Re: Most Impressive Combat Reports
« Reply #181 on: February 27, 2012, 08:51:54 pm »

I once had a legendary Marksdwarf with adamantine everything either master crafted or supirior crafted and a legendary axe dwarf with a master crafted axe and full iron armor. They were the last of my military in the dark days of my fort.

When a siege arrive i diding care about the axedwarfs reports, but the Marksdwarf ones were, by definition, "BEWMHEDSHATDEWMHEDSHATBEWBHEDSHATBEWMHEDSHAT.....".

If you want the detailed story, it was baisicaly "The =flying adamantine= bolt stikes the Goblin "skill here" in the head, smashing the skull and tearing the brain!" x50
« Last Edit: February 27, 2012, 08:54:10 pm by WaffleEggnog »
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Replica

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Re: Most Impressive Combat Reports
« Reply #182 on: March 02, 2012, 01:57:55 am »

"The Forgotten Beast throws the Troglodyte hammerman by the fourth toe, left foot with the Forgotten Beast's left front leg!"
"The Troglodyte hammerman slams into an obstacle and blows apart!"

The lower caves in my Masterwork Fortress are a combat arena of death between random forgotten beasts and tribes of Batmen and Troglodytes, there is constant fighting going on and one area looks like a combination of the surface of the moon and a graveyard with more than a hundred bodies littering a small area.

A new forgotten beast made of crystal glass announced it presence and started to attack a Troglodyte ambush which was lurking near the graveyard and started wrecking mayhem.
Being made of glass and having no seriously dangerous syndrome to speak of it didn't do much in the way of brute damage however it started to wrestle the damn Troglodytes, disarming them, slamming them into each other or pushing them around, this went on for a while until the forgotten beast grabbed a Troglodyte by the toe MISSED another Troglodyte and sent it flying at an incredible speed more than 50 squares to the north until it slammed forcefully into a lone stone pillar in the middle of an underground lake leaving its mutilated corpse and its limbs splattered at the bottom of the stone pillar while sending its head flying nearly 20 blocks to the west.

In the same fort I also have a goblin invader that survived a 10z fall landing into 3 upright rock spikes and surviving with a fractured leg.
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isitanos

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Re: Most Impressive Combat Reports
« Reply #183 on: March 13, 2012, 04:13:45 pm »

Being made of glass and having no seriously dangerous syndrome to speak of it didn't do much in the way of brute damage however it started to wrestle the damn Troglodytes, disarming them, slamming them into each other or pushing them around, this went on for a while until the forgotten beast grabbed a Troglodyte by the toe MISSED another Troglodyte and sent it flying at an incredible speed more than 50 squares to the north until it slammed forcefully into a lone stone pillar in the middle of an underground lake leaving its mutilated corpse and its limbs splattered at the bottom of the stone pillar while sending its head flying nearly 20 blocks to the west.
Ha ha, that's awesome. You're reminding me that I miss legendary hammermen playing "wolf golf" in the 2D version... any medium-sized creature they hit would fly away leaving a trail of blood.
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Adrian

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Re: Most Impressive Combat Reports
« Reply #184 on: March 13, 2012, 05:28:58 pm »

Last week i swung a steel warhammer at a human enemy in adventure mode.
Then Dwarf Fort invented quantum superposition and the corpse of my opponent was everywhere.
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DungeonJerk

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Re: Most Impressive Combat Reports
« Reply #185 on: March 13, 2012, 06:04:59 pm »

On one of my first terrifying embarks I had two specific combat reports that stood out as all hell broke loose and everyone was fighting and or dieing.

Short back story, I had a stupid hunch that I could stave off the undead hordes if I had enough Wardogs to pick up the slack for my military. I mean after all, 40 Wardogs surely could keep the undead down right?. Hoo boy was I wrong. The initial Zombies were Zombie flying Squirrel Men, but then the Zombie Thrips showed up and wrecked everything when I had the situation under SLIGHT control. Everything after that, was death, death, death, and more death. And some awesome reports

One report was from the Woodcutter, he lasted for 12 pages. Fighting and going down like a MAAAAAN, literally even had a guitar riff with it. He was faced with a Zombie Squirrel Man, Wardog, and some part of a Thrips. They had him completely surrounded, latched on, beating on him, biting him. But he kept fighting, trying to break their grip. Hacking at them with his axe. Hell, he wouldn't even drop his axe until they severely shattered his arms and shoulders on page 9. And he continued fighting even after that till he finally gave into pain on page 12.

Shortly there-after he joined the ranks of the undead

Then there was my military Axe-Dwarfette, her report, which I WISH I could have saved, it lasted for 39+ pages. But, it was all lost when she died, due to her being the last dwarf standing. Since I now assign all my military dwarves to be proficient dodgers along with proficient what-ever's for their respective skills, this battle was awesome. She was surrounded by 12 plus zombies, battling them for over a week at least. Dodging and hacking them with her axe, breaking their grip. Sadly, like the Woodcutter, she got overwhelmed and dragged down and the fortress crumbled to its awesome yet tragic end.

At least they went down fighting, my other two military, a Hammer Dwarf and Spear Dwarf were taking out like whimps. And the others ran like they had a load in their pants. Of course, who could blame them?, there was an actual horde of undead there thanks to my miscalculation with the Wardogs, and also cats. But more so wardogs.
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Lordraymond

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Re: Most Impressive Combat Reports
« Reply #186 on: March 13, 2012, 07:11:18 pm »

I don't know if it counts, but I have four separate 50+ page combat reports of my dwarves whacking on a piece of risen yak hair as it shattered their bones yet their attacks passed right through.

Wat.
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Putnam

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Re: Most Impressive Combat Reports
« Reply #187 on: March 28, 2012, 10:09:14 pm »

Hair is indestructible. Anything that tries to hit it passes right through.

It's also as strong as skin, IIRC. This means that it pushes as strong as things punch.

Greiger

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Re: Most Impressive Combat Reports
« Reply #188 on: March 28, 2012, 11:43:31 pm »

Quote
The Swordsman charges at The Kobold Thief!
The Swordsman slashes The Kobold Thief in the left foot with her ({iron long sword}) and the severed part sails off in an arc!
The Swordsman collides with The Kobold Thief!
The Kobold Thief is knocked over and tumbles backward!
The Swordsman stabs The Kobold Thief in the left lower leg with her ({iron long sword}) and the severed part sails off in an arc!
The Swordsman stabs The Kobold Thief in the left upper leg with her ({iron long sword}) and the severed part sails off in an arc!

I feel bad for the kobold.  I guess just lopping off the leg to keep it from running away wasn't good enough.
That and either longswords are really wide, or kobolds are really tiny.
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MetalHead

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Re: Most Impressive Combat Reports
« Reply #189 on: March 29, 2012, 01:44:52 am »

Quote
The Swordsman charges at The Kobold Thief!
The Swordsman slashes The Kobold Thief in the left foot with her ({iron long sword}) and the severed part sails off in an arc!
The Swordsman collides with The Kobold Thief!
The Kobold Thief is knocked over and tumbles backward!
The Swordsman stabs The Kobold Thief in the left lower leg with her ({iron long sword}) and the severed part sails off in an arc!
The Swordsman stabs The Kobold Thief in the left upper leg with her ({iron long sword}) and the severed part sails off in an arc!

I feel bad for the kobold.  I guess just lopping off the leg to keep it from running away wasn't good enough.
That and either longswords are really wide, or kobolds are really tiny.

Longswords are more than twice the size of shortswords (700 vs 300) and also have larger contact areas.  However I've had stab attacks lob off limbs almost as often as slashes with shortswords and spears.  One of my swordsdwarves earned a reputation for removing goblin heads by stabbing them in the face.

Also, my contribution: in the same fort as Urist McFacelift (and even training in the next barracks over) were my speardwarves.  A couple months after the latest load of migrants and literally right after the dwarven caravan had left the map a siege arrived with a hearty dose of green-skinned nutjobs and their big hairy trolls.  Since most of my military was quite well-trained and well-equipped and of a decent size (27 members of a 111-dwarf fort, full iron equipment minus silver maces/hammers) I decided to sally forth instead of letting them get tripped up in cage traps for 'live exercises' later.

Except of course the new guy.  I'd put him in with my speardwarf squad after setting his uniform (still ironing some of the military crap out at the time), so in the 2 months or so between his arrival and the goblins he'd made it to Adequate Speardwarf and novice dodger, shield/armor user and fighter (either a quick study, surprisingly good teachers or good luck getting sparring in honestly).  When I decided to head out he'd apparently decided to take a nap so I figured he wouldn't wander into the meat grinder.

Right before I begin the slaughter one of his squadmates decides to take a booze break (they have waterskins/flasks but won't drink in the field for some reason) but I didn't register it at the time because I had goblins to butcher.  I send the bulk of my force out to meet the main 3 squads to the south of my entrance while my marksdwarves camped out over the trapped entryway.

I had noticed a fourth squad and some troll on the north side of my fort, but as I like walling in large tracts of surface I figured at their pace their brethren would be purged by the time they'd be in a position to even try a run down my sawmill.

The resulting events however exposed flaws in my logic
1.) The southern groups put up a hell of a fight, and while I didn't lose anyone they held for an obscenely long time
2.) The northern squad and trolls picked the exact moment I shifted my focus south to hustle to my entrance
3.) The trolls decided to take the lead, pushing through my cage trap setups at the fort corners and absorbing most of the marks' fire
4.) That damn new guy REALLY wanted to be part of the fight

So suddenly I've got a lone, raw recruit facing off against an elite swordsgob and the 5 hammers who were still behind him (the rest, like the trolls, were busy being marksdwarf practice pincushions) completely alone and backup literally just out of reach.

And then I learned that my logic was still flawed, as apparently this guy was the god-killing offspring of Kratos and Boadicea.  I watched the fight only for him to emerge victorious and unscathed.
Note the following did NOT occur under a Martial Trance.
Summation of log (Spear = the dwarf, SG = the elite, and HG1-5 are the hammergobs):

Spear stabs the SG in the left hand with his +iron spear+, and the severed part sails off in an arc!
Spear stabs HG1 in the head with his +iron spear+, punching through the skull and tearing the brain!
Spear stabs SG in the right hand with his +iron spear+, and the severed part sails off in an arc!
Spear bashes HG2 in the head with his +Iron spear+, driving the skull through the brain!
Spear stabs SG in the left foot with (spear) and the severed part sails off in an arc!
Spear stabs HG3 in the upper body with (spear) tearing the heart!
Spear stabs HG4 in the head with (spear) and the severed part sails off in an arc!
Spear stabs SG in the right foor with (spear) and the severed part sails off in an arc!
Spear stabs HG5 in the head with (spear) tearing the brain!
Spear kicks SG in the head, jamming the skull through the brain!

This is after removing all the blocks, dodges and parries he pulled off during the fight.

So he picked up a few quick levels in most of his combat skills, and walked away unscathed with a shiny new title and blood most likely pouring off of him.  I pray he finds death in some fashion that doesn't involve the word 'berserk' and my dining room, assuming death even wants to deal with him in the first place.
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Chronomancer

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Re: Most Impressive Combat Reports
« Reply #190 on: March 31, 2012, 09:16:47 pm »

Forgotten Beast teared through a goblin siege that was happening a while ago. I'm not clear on the details, but I remember the beast slamming an ogre so hard that both his arms came off.
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Aviator CJ

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Re: Most Impressive Combat Reports
« Reply #191 on: March 31, 2012, 10:30:14 pm »

I had a doe rabbit fighting a Forgotten Beast in my last fight. I had about 90 pages of "the FB kicks the rabbit in the head, but the attack glances away!" while the rabbit kept on biting and latching on. There was Beastie ichor all over the place, until the FB got a headlock on the rabbit, which severed an artery in the neck.
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Reudh

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Re: Most Impressive Combat Reports
« Reply #192 on: March 31, 2012, 10:41:56 pm »

Yeah, massive size differences in enemies often means that the hits will glance away because of the low surface area hitting the opponent.

If your foot is 50 times larger than your opponent's head, then in DF physics you kick it with 1/50th the strength.

Meph

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Re: Most Impressive Combat Reports
« Reply #193 on: April 01, 2012, 06:13:29 pm »

I have the most fun with the combat reports of my magic superunits. The Mountainking has this old DF ability to send everything he hits flying, does not matter if its a kobold or an elephant. :)
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psychologicalshock

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Re: Most Impressive Combat Reports
« Reply #194 on: April 01, 2012, 06:51:57 pm »

Being made of glass and having no seriously dangerous syndrome to speak of it didn't do much in the way of brute damage however it started to wrestle the damn Troglodytes, disarming them, slamming them into each other or pushing them around, this went on for a while until the forgotten beast grabbed a Troglodyte by the toe MISSED another Troglodyte and sent it flying at an incredible speed more than 50 squares to the north until it slammed forcefully into a lone stone pillar in the middle of an underground lake leaving its mutilated corpse and its limbs splattered at the bottom of the stone pillar while sending its head flying nearly 20 blocks to the west.
Ha ha, that's awesome. You're reminding me that I miss legendary hammermen playing "wolf golf" in the 2D version... any medium-sized creature they hit would fly away leaving a trail of blood.
It happened in the early days of 3D also, I remember a kobold thief being flung across a 4x4 map by a proficient hammerman. Best thing was he even managed to survive!
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