You head inside. The gaming supplies are set up in the living room. They ordered a pizza but it's already gone. Luke is eating the last piece. Oh well.
You're the last person to arrive. At the head of the table is the DM, a tall skinny guy with a blonde ponytail and horn-rimmed glasses. To his left is Luke, and to Luke's left is a grotesque immensity, 10% girl, 10% cigarette smoke, 80% goth, draped in frilly black robes and black lipstick that you think might actually be greasepaint. You don't learn her name, but find out she prefers to be called MelanCholy Rose, or MCR.
To her left is a blonde girl. At first you breathe a sigh of relief that at least one member of the group isn't a monster, until she turns to you and flashes the spastic grin of a fangirl. She's wearing a hetalia shirt and a notebook labeled HOTHOTHOT YOWIE SLASHFIC is on the desk in front of her. Her name is Dorothy.
Again, you feel the urge to run, but the door is already shut. They're beckoning you. You manage a defeated sigh and sit down. It's going to be a long night.
The DM pulls out his Fantastiventures Steampunk book. Luke grunts disapprovingly.
"So uh, what kind of characters are you guys planning on playing? He starts with you.
Your expert roleplayer's brain quickly comes up with an idea. "I was thinking I'll probably play a bard, a real char--"
"BARDS ARE SHIT," Luke belches, eyes filled with fury. "Why would you play a bard man, they're useless! I'm getting some snacks, I don't want to hear this guy's bullshit..." He stands up, nearly knocking the table over, and leaves for the kitchen. You catch a glimpse of him getting out a mixing bowl.
You continue. "I was thinking a bard, human, a charming and reasonable guy." There are mutters of approval, and the DM moves onto Dorothy.
She begins, "IIIII was thinking of... a sorcerer. A bishi sorcerer! He has long purple hair, no, make that orchid hair. Because of his magic powers, he's always surrounded by sparkles, and this embarrasses him! He's a shy uke and doesn't like to talk much, especially to cute boys." The cadence of her voice is somewhere between "dolphin" and "the sound your teeth make when you rub them against a bastard file"
When Dorothy is finished giggling and foaming at the mouth, MCR details her character, filling the room with tobacco smoke. "Moonlight Ravenwing is a vampire rogue. Her skin is ivory and her hair is ebony. She's a rogue because she likes the darkness. Life is a carnival of pain, and she understands that."
The DM calls for Luke and he yells something unintelligible. You hear a beeping sound and a moment later he waddles in. "Is it my turn finally?" He sits down.
The DM notices Luke's empty hands and asks, "Uh, didn't you say you were getting a snack?"
"Uh, yeah, it's in the oven, jackass."
"Wh-what snack are you making?"
"Lasagna."
The DM has nothing to say.
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This is your last chance to change your character concept. Are you sure you want to be a charming, reasonable bard? Once Luke gives his character concept, the deal will be sealed.