So how do we refer to Rape of Nanking now?
That event was sufficiently violent and horrible that I don't think the use of the term is a problem at all, especially considering the fact that actual rape was involved.
The problem with using "rape" to refer to things like economics, or as a political tool, or casually ("I got totally raped in that game last night") is not only that it serves as a potential trigger or might be offensive. It's also that it trivializes a very serious and very traumatic thing, and this is not what western society needs. Western society trivializes rape itself enough. It doesn't need any help.
But isn't the sexual attack term derived form the original term? So... in essence, calling a sexual attack "rape" is trivializing the original meaning of the word: http://www.etymonline.com/index.php?term=rape
You're kidding, right? The centuries-old etymology of a word isn't very relevant. What matters is what it means right now, your own link shows that it has referred to sexual violation
since the Renaissance or so, it still means that today, and colloquial usages of the word stem
directly from that meaning.
I've known multiple people who have been victims of sexual assault. In fact, statistically speaking, you probably do too. I can tell you from experience in dealing with them that, yes, using the word "rape" in an inappropriate context can be upsetting.
Also: Yes, subverting a word (and therefore a concept) to use it in trivial contexts
does trivialize that context. When you take a word that refers to something incredibly traumatizing and use it in a metaphorical sense to refer to, say, getting beaten in a video game, or being told to pay for something by the government, that
trivializes the concept. When people use "rape" in that sense, it's not in some extremely convoluted or historical sense that just happens to coincidentally be connected to a word that refers to sexual assault; it's used that way
because it refers to sexual assault, because it makes referring to something as "rape" an extremely cheap and easy way to sensationalize something. It's a dysphemism, or something like it; it's using an extremely harsh word/concept to exaggerate a more trivial one by metaphorically equating the two. In the case of something as common, traumatic, and commonly trivialized as sexual assault, yes, this
is trivializing something that shouldn't be trivialized. Rape is a very serious and socially relevant subject, is a very common thing for people to have gone through, and should not be used to metaphorically refer to casual events or as a cheap political tool to mess with people's emotions about a subject.
And no, nobody thinks the person would actually be referring to sexual assault; that isn't the point. The point is that it's extremely offensive and potentially triggering to sexual assault victims to refer to things as "rape" that aren't, and that the concept shouldn't be taken that lightly or trivialized in such a manner.