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[Furtuka]

Make sure to talk to everybody in the castle. Eeeeeevveeeeeryyyyybooooodyy.

[Tawa]

Awesome.

Also, I'm not quite sure how your Scrafty seems to have used Aerial Ace and Fly during your fight with the fighting-type guy.

[monk12]

Awesome.

Also, I'm not quite sure how your Scrafty seems to have used Aerial Ace and Fly during your fight with the fighting-type guy.

Oh frig, I missed that one. Needless to say, Himmler solo'd that fight

[Cerol Lenslens]

I don't want to spoil anything, but you're getting close to what I considered one of the biggest dick moves by GameFreak in the series. Also, I should note tha-


[Hey, guess who else knows Aerial Ace for some mysteriou-]


[NO!] *Hi Jump Kick*


*OHKO*

...

*ahem* that the original Gen 1 gym leaders and Elite Four had terrible teams. I'm talking 'Giovanni using Tackle and Tail Whip as moves'-level terrible. It was often a bit easier to survive level disadvantages there. I do cringe at the B/W Elite Four having only 4 mons each, though. Also, Chandelure has a potent SAtk stat, so Basculin isn't quite as bad as it looked there.

(Also, the above exchange with The Interrupting Bisharp appears twice in your post: once in Grimley, where I assume it belongs, and once in Caitlin, where it is somewhat confusing, unless Bisharp is the Kanye West of Pokemon...)

[monk12]

Aw frig my editing was terrible this go around. Oh well.

[Urist Imiknorris]

Bisharp is the Kanye West of Pokemon.

It is.

[Shinziril]

For reference, Aerial Ace is apparently based off of a famous sword technique, with a name that didn't translate the reference well.  This explains quite a bit, including the huge number of non-Flying Pokemon that can learn the move and why the Honedge line of Pokemon learn it as a level-up move, despite not being Flying-type in any way. 

[monk12]

For reference, Aerial Ace is apparently based off of a famous sword technique, with a name that didn't translate the reference well.  This explains quite a bit, including the huge number of non-Flying Pokemon that can learn the move and why the Honedge line of Pokemon learn it as a level-up move, despite not being Flying-type in any way.

Ooh, that's actually pretty neat.

[monk12]

PART XXXVII: Final Destination

I mean, it makes as much sense as anything

	Okay, I think I'm ready for this nonsense. N wants a showdown, and I suppose he'll get one.
	Those in accord with Fate are preserved, and those who rebel against Fate perish. When the Way is forgotten, duty and justice appear. One can lose the forest for the trees. If you make a mistake and do not correct it, that is a second mistake. Superior men understand what is right. Inferior men understand what will sell. There are not two suns in the sky, nor two sovereigns over the people.*
	So you guys are called Sages because you've studied with the guy who writes fortune cookies, then? Get out of my way, N wants me to fight in some kind of wacky duel.
	Well... If anything should happen to our king, it would be disastrous. It would ruin Ghetsis' perfect plan! Our lord N will be disappointed, but the six of us shall defeat you here!*
	Can ya manage that? Still standin', are ya, Monk?*
	Better than I ever did! Lookin' like a true survivor, feelin' like a little kid.
	You... You're Driftveil's...?!*
	Hrrmph! Ain't just me!*
	Sweet Mew, all the Gym leaders are here! And actually doing something!
	So sorry... Not only are we stronger than you, but there are a lot of us!*
	Accursed Gym Leaders!*
	Said no one ever.
	Ignoring Team Plasma... That would be a terrible thing for us Gym Leaders to do.*
	I hate you so much right now.
	Bianca asked us to come, too.*
	Mew... dammit, Burgh.
	...*
	I'm fine! Don't worry!*
	No need to worry!*
	Holder of the Light Stone, please proceed!*
	Yeah, okay. You folks play nice now. I'm going into the final dungeon now.

No lava pits, no Chain Chomps...
Are we sure this is the final dungeon?

	...Come.*
	Augh! Gym leaders, defend me!
	In this castle, you may rest your Pokemon and access your PC. Fear not. First, have your Pokemon rest in that room. When they are healed, it is our lord N's wish that you be moved to the innermost part of this castle.*
	Oh. Well, that's convenient. To the healing wench!
	I am Concordia. I give peace and comfort to N.*
	So I wasn't that far off with "wench," was I?
	N has been separated from people since he was young. He was brought up with Pokemon... Pokemon that were betrayed, mistreated and hurt by bad people... Ghetsis deliberately brought only those poor Pokemon closer to N. N was touched by their plight, and started pursuing his ideals, thinking only of Pokemon. N's heart is pure and innocent. But there is nothing more beautiful and terrifying than innocence.*
	Babies are only terrifying if they're your babies. N won't be my problem for much longer.
	We had been secretly building this castle for several years by overworking Pokemon that we took away. Without being noticed by anyone...*
	When I'm Champ, I'm getting a Ground type user in my Elite Four to make sure nobody ever again builds a secret fortress beneath my own fortress. The fact I need to use the word "again" in that sentence is still pretty distressing.
	A battle between you and our lord N will reveal whether our lord N is an ideal hero. It will also reveal how you feel about protecting the current world, where people live with Pokemon.*
	Mostly it's going to reveal how I feel about N ruling any world anywhere, but that works too I guess.
	Ha ha! Now we can even infiltrate the Pokemon Storage System inside every Trainer's PC! If our king wills it, we can steal every Pokemon stored in a PC Box and release them all!*
	Wow, okay, now that's a threat! You'd think that would have been foreshadowed! I need to go fight N posthaste... how big is this castle, anyway?
	That room was the world that was provided to our lord N... I don't feel anything, even when I go into the room... But you may feel something.*
	Well that's ominous. A room where N was subjected to the results of the worst Pokemon abusers Unova can provide... who knows what horrors of N's childhood lurk behind this door?

Not pictured: Basketball Court, Bouncyhouse, Chocolate Wonderfall
okay maybe not that last one

Oh sweet Mew N had his own PERSONAL SKATEPARK in his BEDROOM. I was playing Tony Hawk growing up, and he WAS Tony Hawk! Tony Hawk with a sweet trainset and basketball court and airplane mobile and I don't know what that big bouncy thing is but it looks FUN as BALLS and I bet I can find a RACECAR BED behind those giant building blocks! Okay, not sorry for him anymore, I'm ready to fight!

Oh hey, so is he

	Welcome, holder of the Light Stone.*
	Oh, hey Ghetsis. I forgot you were played by special guest Hugo Weaving.
	The castle that appeared as if it were enveloping the Pokemon League is a symbol. It means Unova will change. The king of this castle is the strongest Pokemon Trainer in the world.*
	Really? I don't remember asking for a castle.
	He is accompanied by the legendary Pokemon. He has defeated the Champion. Added to all that, his heart burns with the desire to improve the world. If that's not what makes a hero, what more do you need?*
	Sanity, maybe? I'd say competence, except he faked his way past the Elite Four and Alder somehow.
	Now that the stage is set, we can seize people's minds and hearts. We can bring into being the world that I- no, that Team Plasma- desires more easily than you can imagine! We and only we will use Pokemon, and we shall rule the powerless populace!*
	You may not have noticed, but the populace is already pretty powerless what with the constant savagings by wild animals and general lack of qualified trainers.
	I've been waiting so long for this! I've kept my silence so no one could piece together what I planned. Now, those painful days are at an end! Go! Onward! Discover whether you have what it takes to be a hero!*
	You're the real villain, I get it already! Get out of my way so I can fight the minboss first!
	What I desire is a world for Pokemon, and Pokemon alone. I will separate Pokemon from people, so Pokemon can regain their original power. It's time to settle this once and for all! My determination is absolute! I will prove the value of my beliefs even if it means my Pokemon friends get hurt!*
	So are we gonna fight, or...
	Since you've come this far, I believe you are equally determined.*
	Damn straight! This day has been 3 years, 8 months and 11 days coming!
	If that's so, prove it to me! Show me the depth of your determination! You came all this way to battle me... But Reshiram is not responding. You haven't yet been recognized as the hero, have you?*
	Not many people do, no. It's an easy mistake to make.
	How disappointing. I actually kind of liked you a little. Through our many battles, I got the feeling that you might be a Trainer who truly cares for Pokemon! But I was kidding myself. The idea of Trainers getting to know each other through battles is ridiculous! You have two options. Challenge me to a fight you can't win, or leave this place and watch the birth of a new world where Pokemon are free of people! Zekrom! Come to me!*
	The Light Stone... It's trembling inside the Bag!*
	Hey! What are you doing looking at my sack, Madden?
	Your Light Stone is... I mean, Reshiram is...*
	That's not what I call it! EVERYONE STOP STARING AT MY SACK! I MEAN IT!

So, uh, didn't they cause the Apocalypse last time they fought?
Is that going to be addressed, or...

	Oh hey, that's a thing.
	Zekrom and Reshiram... They were once one life. One Pokemon. Complete opposites, yet the same. Zekrom and Reshiram are Pokemon that appear before the hero they recognize. Ah... I see. You really are a hero, too.*
	He probably just loves my devil-may-care attitude and roguish charm.
	I'll tell you what that Pokemon is saying to you. "I want to battle with you. Try to make me your friend and ally."*
	[That's rather more polite than what I actually said, puny mortal.]
	It plans to test you to see if you are really pursuing truth. I, also, am curious to see how powerful you are. Now, catch Reshiram and make it your ally!*
	[Yes, capture me if you can, mortal! I am Reshiram, Reshiram the White, Harbinger of the Final Truth, Bringer of Eternal Light! I have seen you battle as in a dream, your warrior spirit once more drawing me into this world! I have seen violence and death, trial and triumph, each battle bringing us closer to this, the final contest, the ultimate test! I am the very spirit of ancient Unova! I AM the Truth! Prepare for battle unending, conflict and strife! Dance with my flames, mortal, and despair-]
	Master Ball I choose you!
	[WHAT NO]

Is that a tuft of feathers, or are you just happy to see me?

	I think I'm gonna call you...
	[A name? I am a living legend! Quite literally one of a kind. My name is Reshiram. You know this.]
	Quatermain
	[I don't understand.]
	*cough*
	Ah... I see. Reshiram, who is said to lend its power to the hero who searches for truth, has recognized your power and now agrees to stand by your side... Hold on. Your Pokemon are hurt.*
	...no they're not? I just healed downstairs, and Quatermain didn't get the chance to attack me.
	There is no triumph to be gained in battling a weakened opponent.*
	Except that that is EXACTLY how Pokemon League is supposed to work! You've been a king for less than ten minutes and you've already ballsed it up! Stop trying to heal me, turn on the dramatic music and FIGHT!
	Now, I will create the future I desire! I shall sweep you before me!*
	[At long last, a battle for the ages!]
	[Truly, this is the moment we have all been waiting for!]
	Good play N, we should lead with the lower-level Pokemon.
	[Lower level? Foolish mortal, I am Zekrom the Destroyer-!]
	[Save your breath, brother; he does not hear us, and his other Pokemon are indeed six levels higher than us.]
	[Six levels? But... I am Zekrom the Destroyer, forebear of all Unova...]
	[Yes, well, the young people have been battling athletes for a month while we've slept in our stones, so I suppose it is to be expected. Don't let them bother you, let's have our fight like we planned.] *Dragonbreath*
	*Fusion Bolt*
	*Fusion Flare*
	*KO*
	[VICTORY!]
	Woah! Truly a battle for the ages! A conflict between two primordial beings, caught on camera!
	Yeah, yeah, a real riveting three turns of battle. N actually fields a full team though, so we're not done yet.
	[It won't take too long though.]
	[We'll see about that!] *Stone Edge*
	[Sure we will, level 50 rock turtle.] *Hi Jump Kick*
	*KO*
	[I will have my revenge!] *Focus Blast*
	[Augh!] *Hi Jump Kick*
	[Oh no!] *OHKO*
	Amazing! N's Zoroark was disguised as a Klingklang, but Monk's Pokemon saw right through and hit it with a supereffective fighting move!
	I mean, it was disguised as something else weak to Fighting. Also, if it was disguised as a Klingklang, that means...
	[For real this time!]
	[I might be almost dead, but you're still weak to Fighting and slow as balls.] *Hi Jump Kick*
	*OHKO*
	Urkel, please drink this Max Potion before you die, mmkay?
	[WELCOME TO DAIRY QUEEN MOTHERFUCKER!] *Blizzard*
	[Missed me!] *Hi Jump Kick*
	*OHKO*
	My last friend... please share your courage with me!*
	You're going to need more than courage to sweep my entire team with your last-
	Go Archeops!
	[Bring it on!]
	SWEET MEW IT'S THAT ACROBATICS FUCKER! URKEL GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT-
	*Acrobatics*
	[GRAAABLEARAR!]
	[A Ghost is fine too.] *Crunch*
	[AIEP AIEP AIEP!]
	Fuck that was a lot of damage...
	*Ominous Wind* *+Stats*
	Oh. Well that's alright then.
	*Shadow Ball*
	*KO*
	He did it! Monk has defeated Zekrom and the reigning Pokemon Champ, N!
	Everything's ruined. The ideals I held. The dreams Pokemon shared... Zekrom and I were beaten. Your truth... Your feelings... They were stronger than mine, it seems... Reshiram and Zekrom... Each of them choosing a different hero... Is that even possible?*
	Um. Yes?
	Two heroes living at the same time- one that pursues truth and one that pursues ideals. Could... Could they both be right? I don't know. It's not by rejecting different ideas, but by accepting different ideas that the world creates a chemical reaction. This is truly the formula for changing the world.*
	Yeah sure. This castle is mine now, get yourself and your false god off my property.
	After all of that, do you think you're still worthy of sharing the name Harmonia with me? You good-for-nothing boy!*
	Your last name is Harmonia? Bahahahaha!
	To start with, I spurred N into pursuing ideals. The reason we reawakened the legendary Pokemon now was to give MY Team Plasma more power! Power to control the fearful masses! That at least was well done. After saying you had to put your beliefs on the line and battle to see which one chosen by the legendary Pokemon was the true hero... You lost to an ordinary Trainer!*
	Hey now, you're in no position to go calling people names, Harmonia. I bet the kids called you Harmonica G in school.
	There is such a thing as being too stupid! Add it up, and you are nothing more than a warped, defective boy who knows nothing but Pokemon...*
	Pokemon and trains, and perhaps sweet skateboarding tricks.
	Monk! I never would have thought the legendary Pokemon would choose a Trainer like you! It caught me completely off guard. This doesn't change my goal. My plans have not been disturbed! In order to rule the world utterly, in order to manipulate the hearts of people who know nothing, I will have N be the king of Team Plasma. But, for that to work, you- since you know the truth- You must be eliminated!*
	Oh, right on to straight up murder then. You're much better at this King thing than N.
	Rule the world?? Wasn't Team Plasma's goal to liberate Pokemon?*
	That was just a convenient lie that I needed to create Team Plasma. Use your head.*
	Seriously, have you even been paying attention Cheren?
	What's to be gained from letting go of useful things like Pokemon? Certainly, manipulating Pokemon helps people expand their possibilities. That much, I can agree with. So it naturally follows that only I should be able to use Pokemon!*
	You fool! That's a ridiculous idea!*
	You can say whatever you want. A Pokemon, even if it's revered as a deity, is still just a Pokemon.*
	That's what I've been saying!
	Monk, so what if it chose you! That doesn't mean you're a threat. Come on! Now you'll face ME in battle! I can't wait to see the look on your face when you've lost all hope! I won't allow anyone to stop me! No matter who does what!*
	Ghetsis, Ghetsis, shhhh.
	What? What is it?
	Theme music. Full circle baby!
	Go Cofagrigous!
	[Grah!] *Toxic*
	Go... Well I guess Quatermain is still top of the party.
	[You guess. Okay.] *Dragonbreath* *Dragonbreath*
	*KO*
	[Row Row Fight da Powah!] *Head Charge* *Critical Hit!*
	*KO*
	Oh good, the Old Gods are all dead now.
	[I'm unconscious, not dead!]
	Wow, gas escaping from the body sounds almost like words. Anyway, get back out there, Urkel!
	[Too easy.] *Hi Jump Kick*
	*OHKO*
	[Oho, weak to Fighting Types eh?] *Focus Blast* *Focus Blast*
	[...did you really just miss with both of those, dawg?]
	[...maybe.]
	[Embarassing. Let's see how you like my Dragon murdering technique!] *Dragon Claw* *Dragon Claw* *Dragon Claw*
	*KO*
	[No! The boss is down!]
	[And the rest of you chumps are no threat at all.] *Crunch* *Hi Jump Kick* *Hi Jump Kick*
	*OHKO*
	*OHKO*
	*OHKO*
	What?! I created Team Plasma with my own hands. I'm absolutely perfect! I AM PERFECTION! I am the perfect ruler of a perfect new world!*
	Yeah, you're perfect. Perfectly bad! Oh sick burn! Cheren, come one, up top!
	Now, N... Do you still think Pokemon and people should be separated?*
	Mwa ha ha! Since I couldn't become the hero and obtain the legendary Pokemon myself... I prepared someone for that purpose- N! He's nothing more than a freak without a human heart. Do you think you're going to get through to a warped person like that?!*
	Man, and here I thought I was the ass. You're only allowed to think that kind of stuff!
	Alder, it's a waste of valuable time listening to him ramble on. He is the one without a human heart!*
	You're right. He's truly pitiful. N... I'm sure you have much to think about. I know you were not pursuing ideals because of Ghetsis' manipulation, but because your heart was really inspired. That is why you were able to meet the legendary Pokemon!*
	Hey, what about me? I met a legendary Pokemon too, except then I won my battles! I'm a hero! Who's the main character here?
	But... I have no right to be the hero!*
	Is that so? What you and the legendary Pokemon are going to do from now on... That's important, wouldn't you say?*
	Acting like you understand... Up till now, we've been fighting each other over our beliefs! Yet despite that... Why?!*
	N, even if we don't understand each other, that's not a reason to reject each other.*
	It's probably a reason to not hang out, though.
	There are two sides in any argument. Is there one point of view that has all the answers? Give it some thought.*
	Come on, that was funny! Pay attention to me, dammit! Don't just walk away with Ghetsis! You better be taking him to jail while I construct a suitable execution tower!
	I want to talk to you about something.*
	Oh Mew, why do you torment me so.
	Hee hee!
	It's about when I first met you in Accumula Town. I was shocked when I heard what your Pokemon was saying. I was shocked because that Pokemon said it liked you. It said it wanted to be with you.*
	Yeah, and being with me got poor Marvin permanently deaded. What's your point?
	I couldn't understand it. I couldn't believe there were Pokemon that liked people. Because, up until that moment, I'd never known a Pokemon like that. The longer my journey continued, the more unsure I became. All I kept meeting were Pokemon and people who communicated with one another and helped one another.*
	Really? Because it seems you spent a lot of time around douchebag Plasgoons.
	That was why I needed to confirm my beliefs by battling with you. I wanted to confront you hero-to-hero. I needed that more than anything. There's no way a person like me, someone who understands only Pokemon- No, actually... I didn't understand them, either.*
	Somewhere out there there's a Train Pokemon with your name on it, N.
	No way could I measure up to you, when you had met so many Pokemon and were surrounded by friends...*
	You didn't see Cheren hang me out to dry in that double battle on national TV, did you?
	The Champion has forgiven me, and...*
	No, N, the former Champion has forgiven you. Technically, you're the former Champion, so he's the former former Champ.
	What I should do now is something I'll have to decide for myself. Monk! You said you have a dream... That dream... Make it come true! Make your wonderful dream a reality, and it will become your truth! Monk! If anyone can, it's you!*
	Right then, time to go declare myself King of Unova! It's been a long time coming, but finally-
	Well, then... Farewell!*
	Wait NO

The End


It can't be the credits already!

Starring
Elrond of Rivendell as Ghetsis Harmonia


I had so many plans!

Battle Commentary
John Madden


Come on, I didn't even get to put my Pokemon in the Hall of Fame!

Hall of Fame
Quatermain the Reshiram
Urkel the Scrafty
Himmler the Unfezant
Teddy the Cofagrigous
Nemo the Basculin
Toad the Amoongus


Stupid vengeful narrator... at least mention the real heroes!

In Memoriam









No, I meant the readers! They're the real heroes for putting up with my infrequent nonsense!

Special Thanks
OCyrus, a good friend who kept badgering me to finish this
Nintendo, a good game company who managed to put out both a sequel and the next Gen before I finished
Countless unattributed art and photo credits stolen from Google, but especially Ken Sugimori and pokemondb.net
Bulbapedia for various fact checking services
And, of course, Viewers like You!

Aha! Finally, I have perfected a means to hijack this thread for my own devices!
You're too late, Lord Liepard! You missed the end of this thread... by a whisker!
Curse you Secret Agent Servine! I know you're responsible somehow!

...so, what about the postgame-

Thanks for reading!

[Xantalos]

[MagmaMcFry]

[ArKFallen]

It rests at last. Bravo!
Funny that Reshiram died his second battle with you. Guess there's a reason they retired from godhood

[Furtuka]

Woohoo! It's finally over~

Soooooo are you gonna do Black2 now?

[birdy51]

Huzzah! Bravo!

[Remalle]

Wow.  It sure has been a ride.